Seymour's Devilish Edit

My pet rock, Seymour, loves South Park.

So when he read an article that seemed a parody of a South Park parody -- one about demon animals hailing Satan at Christmas -- he went into "editing pet rock gone wild" mode, and had a field day with the unveiling of a satanic statue in Deadtroit:

Satanic Temple finds perfect place for satanic sculpture unveiling: Deadtroit

By Seymour PetRock -- WTF News Soivice

 

DEADTROIT (WTFNS) - A Satanic collection of devil-may-cares unveiled a controversial bronze Baphoman sculpture in Deadtroit, a “perfect location” after 50 plus years of leftist control has sent the place to the devil.

Due to God being booed at the last demoncrap convention, the group figured that Deadtroit was the place to start. They figure that unveiling of its 9-foot-tall monument will go over acceptably too in Seattle, San Freakcisco, nyc, DC (in front of the Demoncrap National Committee Hall of Devil Worship) and Shotcago.

The upcoming sorta paraphrasing reprise of a South Park parody unveiled the one-ton likeness of a mix of demoncrap politicians just before 11:30 p.m. local time as supporters cheered, "hellary, hellary." Some of the heathens in attendance rushed to loot stuff, only to find Deadtroit is pretty much void of lootable places now.

The statue of a winged Baphoman – combining features from leading demoncraps – with body parts bought from Panned Parenthood, the head of the DNC chairpoison, and race/gender neutral with the Marie Barf hashtag “#DemoncrapLiesDon'tMatter”, resembled a design the group previously tried to get as the new demoncrap party icon. A nearby statue of a boy was removed because of the politically correct demand by feminincompoops to not have a 'negative male influence' diminish the display.  The feminincompoops are also demanding that it becalled a "baphowomyn".

Bruce/Caitlyn Jenner's cat, Booger, barked its approval.  Or was just trying to moo up a hairball forcefully. 

Jacked Upp, director of the Deadtroit chapter of the Demoncrap National Committee, said temple members planned to transport the sculpture to the Fauxtus home town, soon as they figure out where in Hell it is.

The Temple had unsuccessfully applied to have the statue appointed as hellary's running mate, but realized that because her crimepaign is starting to go to the devil, perhaps that declaration may have to be changed to 'Burnie' Sanders or Fauxcahontas.

On Saturday, the presentation of Baphowomyn in Deadtroit drew applause and adulation from msnbc, wherein the entire staph repeatedly wet themselves in satanic orgasms of joy that they got the statue name politically corrected. It was noted that the Satanic Temple previously tried to display the statue only to fear a backlash from their allies in ISIS scuttled the plan.

"We're sure our friends in ISIS are okay with this now, because Marie Barf is getting them jobs," said Al Barfton over a bullhorn that could be heard at cnn. A souse with msnbc reports that Brian Williams will relate his mission flown over Teheran with the Baphowomyn during the Iran-Iraq War in 1986 where he landed with hellary under sniper fire from the vast Fox News conspiracy. The fact that Fox News didn't begin until 1996 was dismissed by msnbc as being misconstrued dependency on what one's definition of “is” is.  


Seymour isn't thinking about a Pulitzer with this one; he thinks he'll need protection from the DNC.

Don't we all.

Would Hitlary Have Erased THIS Email?

Probably.

Since I don't have my own mail server, I reckon I won't.

Work email. A place for serious technical writing.

Most times.

Then there's stuff like I write, when it isn't reporting an event that management probably wishes they didn't need to know about, but would be mad if someone didn't tell them about.

At woik today I posted the following "How Questions Is Answered" email:

How Questions Is Answered.

Sorta.

Tornadoes have been plucking chickens long before humankind knowd about it. As humankind became aware of the phenom, most dismissed it with a shrug, “eh” or “that’s messed up”.

Not Elias Loomis.

In 1842, this visionary lost sleep at work whilst pondering what kind of tornado would take the time to pluck chickens. With enough lost sleep, he changed the question to how strong must be thine tornadic winds what are required to pluck a chicken.

To test his hypothesis – he couldn’t spell it – Loomis acquired a chicken, a powder charge and a 6 pounder cannon.

Loomis loaded the cannon with the powder charge. Then the chicken. The chicken thought it’d be the first to experience the thrill of flight without the risk of losing its luggage via Newark.

At the firing of the cannon, the chicken lost all love of flight...feathers...any worries about lost luggage.

And any resemblance to a chicken.

After an extensive search for and examination of the chicken con carnage, Loomis concluded that the chicken left the cannon at a velocity of 342 mph.

And from this, he concluded that tornadoes cannot work at KFC.

To this day, no tornado has EVER been hired by KFC.  



Stupor Volunteers of Hitlary are probably going nuts about now...I won't be nice to their Marxist lying broad.

They might be wise to take a hint:



But I don't  ;-) 

Lord of What?

Seriously.

I got an email from...The Lord John Thomas of Cwmgiedd, of the Judiciary of England and Wales.

I wonder how the dolphins feel about that?

I don't need to share with you the whole email; this one part will pretty much get you the gist of this whacking great wanker of a scam:


You are reading an e-mail from JUDICIARY OF ENGLAND AND WALES, UNITED KINGDOM. On a daily basis, the Judicial Office coordinates and transmits requests for investigative and humanitarian assistance. The preponderance of economic and financial crimes like Advance Fee Fraud, Money Laundering and Terrorist activities all over the world, etc has had severe negative consequences all over the world, including decreased Foreign Direct Investments and tainting of world's national image.

The menace of these crimes and the recognition of the magnitude and gravity of the situation led to the signing of Memorandum of Understanding on Wednesday 19th June, 2015 between British Government, United States Government, United Nations, Australian Government, Canada Government and Nigeria Government at the United Nations Headquarters located at New York City, USA. It was agreed that to retain the good image of Nigeria and the rest of Africa countries, all the scam victims who lost his/her hard earn money to these faceless thieves will be compensated with just US$250,000.00 (Two hundred and fifty thousands United Stated Dollars only) to avoid sanctioning Nigeria and some Africa Countries.  

 

 

If I didn't know better, I'd think that Marie Harf sent this out.

 

 

At any rate, what it became would horrify Harf and all her leftist moron friends:

 

 

The Judiciary of England, Wales, Walruses 'n Chips

Royal Courts of Jesters

11th floor, Thomas Less Building

Boing Boing, London WC2A 2LL

 

Dear Serf/Serfette,

 

Compliment of the day.  Today's compliment is "twatwaffle".  That beats being called a "bloody wanker". 

We hope this email would find you.  If it didn't, we hope it found somebody. 

You are reading an e-mail from JESTORIAL OF ENGLAND, WALES, WALRUSES 'n CHIPS, UNITED KINGDUMB.  On a daily basis, the Jestorial Office coordinates and transmits requests for invasive enemas and what works them bestest. The preponderance of enematic crimes like Advance Royal Rectal Itch Fraud, Monkey Laundering and Monty Python activities all over the world, etc has had severe negative consequences all over the TV world, including decreased showings of The Ducks Of Horkage, tainting of world's national image on Uranus.  The menace of these crimes and the recognition of the magnitude and gravity of the situation led us to hire someone to read us them woids and tell us what the crikey they meant.  Thus done, we signed us a Milk of Magnesia of  Understanding on Wednesday 19th June, 2015 between FIFA, FIFI, the Queen of Clubs, a pot dispensary in Boulder, CO, United Nations, an asteroid and Nigeria Government at the United Nations Hindquarters located on the backside of Hitlary Clinton, where it all got stuck in her industrial strength thong when she sat on the bloody collective in New York City, USA.  A whacking great tampon it's proven.  It was agreed that to retain the good image of Nigeria and the rest of Africa countries, firstly one would have to be created that people of Uranus and Burntimore would actually believe. 

It's not going well thanks to Al Sharpton, but we keep workin' on it.

To that effect, we are sending you this e-mail because we were required to send out 100,000 emails in the commie core math equation that aliens wearing purple hats sit on waffles and finger their anal sinus passages while whistling for moochelle obola to fetch a stick.  You will receive your stick when she's trained, though count on further delay. 

I WANT YOU TO READ BELOW CAREFULLY, THE NOTICE BELOW STAND AS CAUTION BEFORE IT IS TOO LATE.

 

MR. CHARLES WILLIAM ROME, Lord Aboriginal of Wankerputz presented an Authorization Letter for change of your gender that you are a haggis genital as of one month ago. After the investigations however,it was revealed that there are some dubious surgeons working for the Democrap National Committee in the basement of their Chicago branch who take bribes from Government Officials in Nigeria and the rest of Africa countries who are collaborating with some Foreigners to register mokeawhackadoodles on Uranus to vote for Hitlary Rodehard Clunkhaid 2016 as Most Likely To Go To Jail In A Sumo Thong.  He have also forwarded his Name and Address below as Most Likely To Be Squarshed By Her.

 

Name: MR. CHARLES WILLIAM ROME

Address: 139 Douchenozzle Place, Warshington DC Uniteds State of Democrap Disarray

 

But we wanted to confirm if actually this is reported on msnbc by bedwetter Melissa Hairy-Penis and hence decided to write to your email address which from we constipate a response from you, We will then know that you are dead and thus voting democrap illegally like all dead seem to do in Chicago.  IF PROVED OTHERWISE BY YOU THAT YOU ARE NOT A DUMBASS DEMOCRAP PLEASE, FILL THE Claimant Form below and SEND IT TO HON. MINISTER OF FINANCE, NIGERIA (ATTENTION DR. NGOZI OKONJO-IWEALA) IMMEDIATELY. SHE IS FORMERLY JESSE JACKSON BEFORE HE SAW THE PRESS BRUCE JENNER GOT FOR BECOMING CAITLYN.

 

CLAIMANT FORM:-

1.YOUR FULL NAMES (ALL OF THEM PLEASE)

2. GENDERS (PLEASE LIST THE ONES YOU CLAIM TODAY, TOMORROW, NEXT WEEK, ETC):

3. HOUSE OR OFFICE ADDRESS (P. O. Box not accepted)

4. YOUR PHONE NUMBER(S)

5. COUNTRY:

 

NAME: ATTN: DR. NGOZI OKONJO-IWEALA aka JESSE JACKSON

E-mail: federalministry_offinance_dept@financier.com

 

Immediately you send the above required information to DR. NGOZI OKONJO-IWEALA, she/formerly he will proceed with the Processing/Releasing of your ROYAL GENITAL SWITCHING IDENTITY CARD that used to have a Ducks of Horksrrd confetti flag on top within 2-3 working days based on our agreement.

 

PLEASE NOTE: YOU WILL NOT PAY ANY MONEY TO OBOLASCARE TO RECEIVE YOUR ROYAL GENITAL SWITCHING IDENTITY CARD AS LONG AS YOU ARE ILLEGAL DEMOCRAP. We have signed a contract with BELA PELOSI-CALIFORLORNIA COURIER for the delivery of all the ROYAL GENITAL SWITCHING IDENTITY CARD which should expired December 31st, 2035.

 

IMPORTANT: UNDER PENALTY OF HAVING TO WATCH MSNBC ALONG WITH THE SIX OTHER NINCOMPOOPS THAT SEEM TO LIKE IT, THE INFORMATION YOU SUBMITTED TO DR. NGOZI OKONJO-IWEALA CORRECTLY IDENTIFY YOU AS THE RECIPIENT OF THIS ROYAL GENITAL SWITCHING IDENTITY CARD PAYMENT; NO OTHER LIVING PERSON OR ENTITY IS STUPID AS YOU ARE; IT IS A VIOLATION OF AN OBOLA EXECUTIVE ODOR FOR ANY PERSON TO INTENTIONALLY OR KNOWINGLY MAKE FUN OF MOOCHELLE FETCHING STICKS AND STUFF. BE WARNED

 

Indee ferr de flum de cheekin,  

The Lord John Thomas of Cwmgiedd,

Lord Chief Jester of England, Wales, Spotted Owls, Joe Bidumb and Chips  

 

 

I'm sure the Democrap National Committee will find this most amusing.

 

Not.

Still Begging (And Scamming) For Dollars

While this isn't related to the subject material, it kind of is.  After all, much of the Obola regime HAS been a scam.

I only partially digress.

A scammer long disposed of -- Dangote Alico, the online loan scammer who tried to scam my character, then tried to recruit my character, then begged my character for money for everchanging reasons -- occasionally resurfaces.  Once, with a revised scam that was no better than his first one.

Then...well, here's the deal:  I copy him all about all of the scams I edit and send back to the originating scammers and a growing assortment of their peers and colleagues.  Not that I reckon it makes them any wiser.  Certainly it doesn't Dangote, who responded to my edit of another spellcaster's scam thus:

I taught u are death  

 

My character had a ready response:

 

You probably taught you taw a puddy tat too, and you wuz wrong about dat as well.  I am not death  ;-)  

 

Now that we had that cleared up:

 

Please I am sorry please help me with money  

 

 

Awwww...why not?

 

 

What kind of money help do you need?  Investing advice?  I recommend growth stocks.  

 

Now Dangote is pouting anew.  Perhaps he and Obola should share a beer and a good pout together.

A Pet Rock's View Of What's "Consequential"

Vox.com pronounces Barack Insane Obola the most consequential president in history.

My pet rock, Seymour, knows a wagonload of bullshevik when he hears it.

And knows how to edit it, too.

For example, Obola's claim to have made the world "safer" with his total sell out to Iran.

Only Obola would claim an utter disaster as a triumph.

My pet rock enjoyed making the story more plausible than the AP ever intended:


18-day Obola negotiation yields to Iran

VIENNA (DAP) — After 18 days of bending over backward to get any deal so Obola could crow about another disastrous foreign policy clusterf*** up, Iran struck a deal Tuesday to get other countries to *wink* and *nod* at Iran's nuclear program while giving Iran billions of dollars in relief from international sanctions — an agreement designed to allow Obola to continue his hoax and change and further encourage islamofascism in the Muslim world.
     
The accord will basically not be worth the paper it's printed on, far as Iran is concerned, and it allows Iran to continue to call America "the Great Satan" and now "the Great Dupe".

The deal "is not built on trust, it is not built on verification, it is built on giving me something to brag about without having to explain what I just did to Israel," President Barack Obola declared from the White House, in a statement carried live on Iranian state TV in cartoon form. He said all potential pathways to an Iranian nuclear weapon remain intact.

In Tehran, Iranian President Hassan Rouhani said "it's nothing new, and we'll continue our drive to establish islamofascism everywhere".

On Tuesday in Vienna, all sides but one hailed the outcome. Announcing the accord, Federica Mogherini, the European Union's foreign policy chief, said diplomats "have pulled a Neville Chamberlain on the western world. The deal, she said, ensures that Iran's nuclear program "will ignore us just as Saddam Hussein ignored the UN."



From left to right, a collection of udopian idiots
    
In a final negotiating session with his counterparts from the United States, Britain, China, France, Germany and Russia, Iranian Foreign Minister Mohammad Javad Zarif said, "They wanted a deal so bad they practically wet themselves to make concessions to us."

Suckretary of State John Kerry, who did most of the bending over backward with Zarif, said persistence in appeasing paid off. "Believe me, we were willing to settle for a lesser deal, and that's pretty much what we did," he told reporters.

The breakthrough came after Kerry suffered an anal aneurysm removing his head to see the Miss America swimsuit competition.

Iran agreed to the continuation of a U.N. arms embargo that they can easily evade, knowing that it's been getting around it with help from places like Russia, China and North Korea, though it could end earlier if the International Atomic Energy Agency – doing its usual *wink* and *nod* substandard job – definitively clears Iran of any current work on nuclear weapons. A similar unenforceable condition was put on U.N. restrictions on the transfer of ballistic missile technology to Tehran, which could last for up to eight more years, according to the idiots involved in an Israeli sell out.

Washington had gone through the motions to maintain the ban on Iran importing and exporting weapons, concerned that doing anything substantive to stop Iran would ruin its desire for “smoke and mirrors” accomplishments and a deal it could crow about while Iran ignores it even before the ink is dry on the paper.



US Suckretary of State John Kerry, making stupid statement after stupid statement

    
Iranian leaders insisted the embargo had to end so they can continue to export islamofascism as far and wide as possible. And they got some support from China and particularly Russia, which wants to expand military cooperation and arms sales to Tehran, including the long-delayed transfer of S-300 advanced air defense systems — a move Obola is okay with, so long as it doesn't help Israel.

Another “void of substance” agreement will allow U.N. inspectors to ask pretty please for visits to Iranian military sites as part of their monitoring duties, something the country's supreme leader, Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, had long vowed to oppose. And Iran will be allowed to hem, haw and delay such visits, giving Tehran time to cover up any illicit activity.

Under the accord, which runs almost 100 pages of Jonathan Gruber-esque stupidity, Tehran will exercise the right to challenge the U.N request and an arbitration board composed of Iran and the six compliant, eager-to-appease world powers would then decide on the issue in favor of Iran.

More than one person watching the US wet itself to please Teheran remarked “this smells of Munich, 1938”.

The economic benefits for Iran are potentially massive. It stands to receive more than $100 billion in assets frozen overseas, and an end to a European oil embargo and various financial restrictions on Iranian banks, along with getting the nuclear weapons it eagerly covets.



Lame post surrender press conference
    
But it didn't come easily, as Iranian tempers flared and Western negotiators – Kerry in particular – suffered sphcinter failure trying not to let obola's signature surrender get derailed. The mood soured particularly last week after Iran dug in its heels on several points and Kerry echoed Nancy Bela Pelosi on the Unaffordable Hellthscare Act when she driveled “we have to pass it to find out what's in it”.
 
By Monday the remaining gaps were bridged in a meeting that started with Kerry, an accordian playing monkey, and a picture of Neville Chamberlain, and then involved the Iranians. A half-hour after Zarif's threat to expose Kerry as having “done the monkey” during the previous weekend, the ministers emerged and told aides they had an accord.

The deal comes after nearly seven years of bankrupt US foreign policy at the hands of Obola, Kerry and his predecessor, Hitlary Clinton. Israel is still trying to identify the truck that ran over it.

    

Suckretary of State John Kerry releases a fart

    
Kerry took the lead in bending over backward during the negotiations. Two months later, in Geneva, Iran and the six powers announced an interim agreement that temporarily curbed Tehran's effort to corner the toy minions market and unfroze some Iranian assets while setting the stage for Tuesday's one-sided accord.

It took time to get the final deal, however. Kerry and Obola had to bend over backward so much that they both made frequent use of Doan's Pills, and Obola had to institute trumped up race riots in Ferguson, Burtimore and other places, to distract Americans from the surrender he was trying to engineer in Vienna.

The disputes are likely to continue, however. In a foreshadowing of the public relations battle ahead, Jen Psuki and Marie Barf are ramping up their abjectly stupid press conference statements and hash tag campaigns to sucker the American public and Congress into believing this deal is better than sliced bread covered with feces.

It isn't.

A paper-waving Chamberlain returned to Britain in '38 to declare “it is peace in our time”, while having convinced Adolph Hitler that war was the answer. Similarities abound in this clusterf*** in a number of categories.

Beyond the parties to the pact, spoilers abound.



Suckretary of State John Kerry tries to cover his horse face from photographers
    
In the United States, Congress has a 60-day review period during which Obola technically can't make good on any concessions to the Iranians, though we know how bound to the rule of law Obola doesn't consider himself to be. U.S. lawmakers could hold a vote of disapproval and take further action, unless Mitch McConnell and John Boehner suck in their cajones yet again and sell out the Constitution to give Obola what he wants.

Iranian hardliners oppose dismantling a nuclear program, and thanks to some of the secret compromises made by Obola and Kerry, they won't have to.

And further afield, Israel will be left practically alone to defend itself. It sees the acceptance of extensive Iranian nuclear infrastructure and continued nuclear activity as a mortal threat, and has warned that it could take military action on its own, if necessary.

Trust me, Israel:  with Obola and Kerry jacking up things, you will have to act on your own.

The deal is a "bad mistake of historic proportions," Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu said Tuesday, seeing what Obola & Co are doing more clearly than the blithering idiots at msnbc and cnn, who are more concerned with presidential candidate Marco Rubio's traffic tickets. 
 
Sunni Arab rivals of Shiite Iran are none too happy, either, with Saudi Arabia in particularly issuing veiled threats to develop its own nuclear program and require its citizens to NOT mail in vote for Obola's hoped-for suckcessor in 2016, Hitlary Clinton, like they did in '08 and '12 for Obola.
___
Disassociated Press is not responsible for what Kim Kardashian is wearing.  


My pet rock is thankful that he's radiation resistant.

Suddenly, Scammers LOVE Themselves Conferences

This seems to be a recent trend in email themes my characters have been receiving.  Take this one -- sure sounds credible and thoroughly professional -- to be held in South Africa at the end of this month (I'll not bore you with the whole email, just a flavor):

International Financial Reporting Standards (IFRS)     142 Catherine Street, Fountainbleau Randburg tel: 011 057 6001

Good day The Knowledge of IFRS is now a standard entry level requirement for all finance professionals. Is no longer a nice to have – it is a necessity! The global acceptance of IFRS as a basis for financial reporting for both publically traded entities and other entities of public interest, such as state ­owned entities, non-profit entities, creates a demand for highly trained financial professionals to implement such standards and principles. Join us for this interactive and highly informative workshop scheduled for 30June -3July 2015 at Randburg Towers Conference Centre, Johannesburg South Africa Register Now! Few Seats Available! R 15,999.00 per Delegate    It goes on in almost excruciating detail to talk about what the conference is about and what the conference will cover, etc, etc, yada yada.  And of course, because it came to an email address of mine that receives about 90% scam emails, it finds itself treated accordingly:  edited.   Here's what that edit went down as:   Interassonal Fiscal Rape Standards (IFRS)     142 Catherine Street, Fountainbleau Randburg tel: 011 057 6001   Good day before this arrive The Knowledge of IFRS is now a standard entry level requirement for all good trained fly infested internet scammers. Is no longer a nice to have – it is a necessity! The global repugnance to IFRS as a basis for fiscal rape of assets by internet café scammers creates a demand for highly trained lowlife scumbags of dubious antecedence wholly lacking in standards and principles. Join us for this illicit and highly ignored by authoritah workshop scheduled for 30 June -3 July 2015 at Randburg Towers Conference Centre, Johannesburg South Africa Register Now! Sh**load of Seats Available! R 15,999.00 per Delegate (which is why sh**load of seats is available). Course Overview The aim of IFRS is to ensure that our scammers maximize their rape and pillage of the fiscal assets of our intended victims (aka, whoever receives and responds naively to our email solicitations).   This interactive training will help our scammers master the form and components of financial assets pillaging prepared under IFRS. Lecture sessions are supplemented by active sessions with severe beatings to attendees who fail practical application exercises during the seminar.  They so named will have their genitals eaten by piranha.   The course will cover the following key areas in interassonal financial pillaging: Introduction to IFRSs Content of IFRS Outhouse Pits Financial instruments: Why you can't play a C note in E flat Reducing scam discovery with all sorts of diversions like "is your fly open?"  Revenue from any source:  even cheating two kids with a lemonade stand is new requirement (IFRS 15) In- depth discussion on How To Identify Scambaiters (bastards)  Practical illustrations using models stolen from Russian and American Porn star photos Our New Total Lack Of standards for 2015 Don't Finger Your Butt While Scamming Assets -- where and on what Liabilities -- which lies work, which don't Financial Pillage Income Taxes -- we laugh at them like Al sharpton Revenue Recognition (if it's money we steal it) Foreign Currency Issues -- most of it ain't worth a sh** Objectives of the programme Understand how to scam people Apply our complete lack of principles in an online scam context Produce and interpret scam victim opportunities Make more money being a shiftless, dishonest piece of shi** Assess respondents to detect scambaiters (bastards) Provide a fiscal buttf**king to whomever, when and wherever Understand the requirements for IFRS financial scams Analyse and interpret IFRS financial scam opportunities Apply newly applicable IFRS amendments whenever we find one that works Be prepared to have your ass kicked by Ogun if you don't produce Receive information on the latest scam ideas and angles in IFRS in order to plan ahead Become familiar with internet sources  (guest books) to maintain up-to-date scam victim email addresses Understand the progress to date on the lack of standards to IFRS throughout the world Who should attend? This course is suitable for any lowlife piece of useless shit who hates the idea of working legitimately for a living.  Examples of some of the roles that will benefit from this course are:         * Third World Scumbags Leftist Scumbags Democrap National Committee Scumbags Super Volunteers of Hitlary Rodehard Clinton the staff at msnbc and cnn Obola regime Scumbags   Course Outline   Day 1 Introduction to IFRS Scamology 101 How To Lie How To Cheat Standards: Why We Don't Have Any Interpretations: We Don't Need No Stinking Interpretations The IFRS framework: fraud, fraud and more fraud Applying the hierarchy of interassonal standards to others, not us Current status of global warming on Uranus Update on NEW IFRS 13 War On Peanut Butter & Jelly Sandwiches How to research and stay up to date on IFRS  Case study: The Abacha Scam Template Scenarios   Day 2   IFRS 15 – Revenue from anyone by any means       How Inheritance Scams Credit Card Scams Business Scams Mystery Shopper Scams ATM card Scams Dying inheritance Scams Intimidation Scams from FBI, Interpol, IRS Dating Scams Craigslist/Ebay Scams Other Scams Common challenges experienced by scammers Case Study:  The Charles Soludo Scam Template Scenarios Day 3   Scam Employee benefits Meet Quotas: No Daily Beatings Free access to Muhammad's Sodomy House of Camels Post-employment benefits – what we'll do to you if you quit us Scenarios  Day 4 A recap of the first 3 Days for the survivors Pygmy buffet Common challenges experienced by scammers   End of the Workshop Facilitator Ms.Lize TerreBlanche Highest qualifications: She was sodomized by a goat herd and still won our coveted Scammer Of The Month Award 15 months in a row  Receive a Free Tour Of A Lagos Fly-Infested Internet Café and visit the only flush toilet outhouse in Nigeria!     For Registration and other Training arrangements call on the detail below Tel: 011 057 6001/ 011 051 4586   Fax: 0862 637 253 Email: info@bmktraining.co.za    http://www.bmktraining.co.za/   IF YOU NO LONGER WISH TO RECEIVE EMAILS FROM US We'll KEEP SENDING THEM ANYWAY YOU STUPID ASSHAT     Whaddaya think?  Do you think the scammers will sign up for the faux conference (and get scammed by some hidden registration fees not herein referenced), or want to sign up for the edited version?