The Scam IRS Is Back...

There are certain and generally limited ways that the IRS will reach out and contact you when they want or need to.

While some of their agents would love to do it as pictured here, this isn't generally SOP for them.

Scammers from Benin don't seem to care to research what is SOP, so as to make their scam templates the least bit believable.  They just mention IRS and money, and hope that's enough.

Doesn't work here.  It especially doesn't work here with a couple of 'editing gone wild' pet rocks named Seymour and Element.

Like for example when this recent effort to give this household the business showed up:

Hello
IRS OFFICE
Greeting from IRS USA
Internal Revenue Service United States Department of the Treasury
Accessibility Skip to Top Navigation 2283 3rd Ave New York, NY 10035,
United States.

Greeting from IRS USA

We the Internal Revenue Service, believed that you received the
previous message we sent to you, prior to your dealings with the U.S
Custom Authority at (JFK) John F. Kennedy International Airport New
York as regards to your over-due contract payment consignment trunk
box wAorth $10,500.000.00 (Ten Million Five Hundred Thousand United
States Dollars only), which was endorsed in your favor and like we
stated earlier, we have dully screened through this project as
stipulated on our protocols of operation and have finally confirmed
that your contract payment is 100% genuine and hitch free from all
face and of which you have the lawful right to claim your fund without
any further delay.   

They went on to audibly flatulate that to make all this happen would cost me only $669 USD.

The 'real' IRS has never offered me millions from any source and most certainly never will...dammit.  The 'fake' array of IRSes out there will certainly keep trying to convince me that they mean it, even when they include mention of the offer coming from assordid West African states.

And that's where my 'editing gone wild' pet rock Seymour comes in:

From: MR. Henry 'Mark of the Demonic Ass' <mn5962351@gmail.com>
Sent: Wednesday, November 10, 2021 3:35 PM
Subject: Oh Hell No It's The IRS OFFICE

Oh Hell No It's The IRS OFFICE

Greeting from IRS USA with orifices wherever asses are.
Infernal Revenue Service United States Department of the Treachery
Accessibility Skip to Top Navigation...oh F**K, Code 404 Error

2283 3rd Ave New York, NY 10035,
United States and Newark.

We the Infernal Revenue Service, believed that you received the
previous message we sent to you, prior to your dealings with the U.S
Cussed Up Authority at (JFK) John F. Kennedy International Airport New
York as regards to shenanigans over a badly-construed template of 

dubious scammercedence worth totally nothing.

It nonetheless was endorsed in your favor and we have dully screened 

through this project as stipulated on our protocols of operation and 

have finally confirmed that this whole process is 100% genuinely f**ked

up and full of more hitches than you can imagine, and we're ready to 

turn your world up-the-f**king-side down without any further delay.

I want to personally assure you that you will have one chance and one

only to make this right, by paying our fees and penalties of USD $669

soonest. All we demand now is for you to do right now go ahead and
send the payment with the name listed below so we can forward it to
our bank accounts in the Benin Republic.

This is what you're paying for and won't receive:

Type:......CONSIGNMENT TRUNK BOX

Containing:...a date night with a full sized inflatable Taylor Swift sex toy

Size:...../ 2:1 CM.
Weight:...5.6KG.
Color:.....BLACK BOX
Registration NO: #98123964
Serial #8867843199
Pin number...*****

Contact us right away and let me know when you will send the noted

fee via MoneyGram or Western Onion before it will become too late for
Consideration.  At which point we turn you over for audit and sneeze

all of your assets, you non-compliant f**k, you.

This is an official notification and we advise you treat it with
utmost urgency, in your best interest which we and only we have

at heart, or some other organ, appendage...whatever.
CONTACT EMAIL serviceoffice602@gmail.com

This edit seemed to work better with the Benin version of the IRS than it might have with the domestic version:  nothing further from the scamsterers.  That said, I refuse to let Seymour or Element edit my taxes like this.

"Oh PHFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT!!!!"

Scammers And Epstein

Yeah it's a little dated, but even scammers don't buy that Epstein kilt hisself.

But they still expect me and my scam-wizened pet rocks to buy what THEY'RE trying to sell.

Like this little gem from the country of Benin:

Dear Beloved in Christ,

Permit me to share with you, my desire to go into Godly business
partnership with you.

I am Mrs. Maureen Greaves, married to Late Alan Greaves (PhD} who
worked with ( Total S.A.) the French Multinational Integrated Oil and
Gas Company and one of the five "Super major" oil companies in the
world as their Africa drilling rig supplier for 17 years before his
death On Christmas Eve 2013. Before his death we were both devout born
again Christian; lay-preacher and former social worker and my late
husband Alan Greaves; was an organist at the church for 40 years,
before his was attacked and beaten with a pickaxes on his way to pray
at Midnight Mass at St Saviour's Church in Sheffield and he died in
hospital three days later as you can confirm this link as stated
below:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2529286/A-year-murder-organists-widow-breaks-vigil.html

A year after his murder, organist Alan Graves' widow breaks down at vigil | Daily Mail Online Alan Graves, 68 (inset) was beaten with a pickaxe on his way to play Midnight Mass in St Saviour's Church in Sheffield. His widow Maureen, 64 (left) wept at a memorial service in the church a year ... www.dailymail.co.uk

.

When my late husband was alive he deposited the sum of ($15.5M) with a
bank in Cotonou Benin where he worked for 17 years last as the (Total
S.A.) Africa drilling rig supplier. I am contacting you because of the
recent report from my Doctor told me that I have some weeks to live
due to cardiac and kidney failure problem, having known my condition,
I seek your concept and permission to present you to the bank as my
late husband foreign investors to retrieve the fund and utilize for
establishing an orphanages home for the poor and needy, and also
propagating the word of God and to endeavor that the house of God is
maintained.

Contact me immediately on my private email:
(Mrsmuareengreaves@writeme.com) Hoping to receive your response
immediately.

Thanks and Remain blessed in the Lord.
l remain yours sister in Christ.
Mrs. Maureen Greaves Church Army evangelist)

Yup...bought that.  Even with the unnoticed (by the scammer) change of name.

I don't think that the scammer bought much of my edit of her email in return:

From: Mrs. Maureen Greaves <zhangisabelle07@gmail.com>
Sent: Saturday, November 6, 2021 3:13 PM
Subject: Dear Take A Letter Maria in Pizza Crust With Yeast Infection

 

Dear Take A Letter Maria in Pizza Crust With Yeast Infection

Permit me to share with you, my desire to go into an unholy

alliance with anything demonic, depraved, perverted and

demagogic.

In short, I want a job in the #fjb regime.

I am Mrs. Maureen Greaves, gender neutral non-binary 

octosexual anthropoid, formerly mated to Late Alan Greaves (pHd} who
worked with the French pedophilia ring Kids 'Fer Us and one of the five 

"Super major" sources of child trafficking operating out of the basement

of maligNANCY Pelosi's San Crapcisco personion.

Then the dumb sh*t went whistle blower, causing him to go Epstein

On Christmas Eve 2020 due to COVID after his plane crashed into

a meat grinder. Before his death I am reliably informed that he

fouled himself just like #fjb did at the Vatican.

I've spent the past 40 years transplanting other species genitals into

six year olds, just to see if Pfizer would grant me a contract.  I did get

a fan letter from Dr. Anthony Fauxci, but nothing else.

Before I underwent multiple sex changes and had a thorough mental

breakdown as a result, I deposited the sum of ($15.50) with a
bank in Cotonou Benin.  Thanks to interest rates there, I now have

a total of $13.59 in that account. I should have invested in 

The Clapper.

I am contacting you because of the recent report from my Doctor 

that told me that I have some weeks of further genital reassignment

surgeries because my piranha genitals just ate my ovaries and are

preparing to go after other vital functions.  

I seek your concept and permission to present you to the bank as my
psychoanalyst to prove once and for all that I deserve an appointment 

to the Navy just like Rachel Levine got.

Contact me immediately on my private email:
(Mrsmuareengreaves@writeme.com) Hoping to receive your response
immediately.

Thanks and Remain blessed by a flying waffle iron.
l remain yours sister in crisis.
Mrs. Maureen Greaves, Church of Goat Heat Baphomets, DNC branch)

I reckon the lack of response to this edit suggests that the scammer doesn't want to get crossways with Hellary...or groped by #fjb.

Scammers and Bidumb Fouling Everything These Days

While #fjb is busy screwing up everything from A to Z, scammers are getting pissed that he's out doing them in the screw'd up department.

Perhaps they'd do well to pay attention to just how screw'd up Bidumb is, but eh...they're not any brighter than the abject nincompoop from Vermont.

And after the Vatican, with emphasis on poop.

At any rate, a scammer from Cote Ivoire came along at a perfect time with a bit of schimel that's right up Bidumb's ass alley.

Here 'tis:

Dear Sir/Madam

I work with Nsia bank, and the account manager to an Engineer Jonas,
who has an account with valued at $16. 7 Million USD. He died with his
wife, and their two children on the 21st of April 2019 in a ghastly
car accident along Yamoussoukro express Road here in Cote Ivoire.

Since we’ve been unsuccessful in locating the relatives for two years
now, i seek your acceptance to present you as a relative to the
deceased, for the fund to be released to you as his next of kin which
will be transferred to your account, and upon confirmation in your
account it will be shared 50/ 50 between us.

All I require is your honest cooperation to receive and secure the
fund in your account till it is shared accordingly. It is risk free as
our interest will be protected. If you're capable to secure the fund ,
respond to my proposition by providing your address, age, occupation
and your mobile number.

Waiting to hear from you.

Mr. Peter zogbe John

This buffoon could be working for Bidumb's depressed suckretary, Jen Psuki, for all I know.

Which is why my primary 'editing gone wild' pet rock, Seymour, wanted a shot at an edit of John's email:

Dear Sir/Madam/WhateverTF You Consider Yourself

I work with Uber Oceanic Shipping, and am in charge of arranging

the dispatching of container ships chocked full of all the world's 

shippable sh*t to wherever the f**k it's supposed to go.

Until recently:  now all my dispatchable ships are stacked up outside

of New York and Los Angeles harbors because #f**kjoebiden is the

biggest incompetent nimrod the world has ever seen, far eclipsing 

Jimmy Carter, Idi Amin and The Three Stooges in the incompetence

department.

The senile old perv has jacked up the world's shipping all because

he crapped himself with the Pope and his punk kid is an amuck junkie.

All I have left to use for product shipping are three replicas of the

Santa Maria, the Pina Colada and the Wallflower, three undersized

wind-driven ships of dubious antecedence and poor lumbering.

Even Greenpeace wants no part of these tubs.

After we lost a similar ship -- the Liechtensteinian-flagged 

Flieger Schiesse, loaded with yo-yos that sank in an Atlantic

storm 38 times -- we need your help.

Throw out the self-soiling nincompoop, and put adults back

in charge, so we can get OUR ships unloaded and back here

to reload.

The shipment of Clappers, located next to an

auditorium is driving us f**king nuts...lights on and f**king

off all day and night.

Please clear this sh*t up.

Waiting to hear from you or someone that looks like you unless you look like #fjbPoopyPants.

Mr. Peter zogbe John

Seymour is eagerly anticipating a reply from John.

My other pet rock, Element, and my deactivated Amazon Alexa, aren't holding their breath.  Which I'm not sure how that'd work, though neither has turned blue so far.