Wednesday, July 29, 2015

Seymour's Devilish Edit

My pet rock, Seymour, loves South Park.

So when he read an article that seemed a parody of a South Park parody -- one about demon animals hailing Satan at Christmas -- he went into "editing pet rock gone wild" mode, and had a field day with the unveiling of a satanic statue in Deadtroit:

Satanic Temple finds perfect place for satanic sculpture unveiling: Deadtroit

By Seymour PetRock -- WTF News Soivice

DEADTROIT (WTFNS) - A Satanic collection of devil-may-cares unveiled a controversial bronze Baphoman sculpture in Deadtroit, a “perfect location” after 50 plus years of leftist control has sent the place to the devil.

Due to God being booed at the last demoncrap convention, the group figured that Deadtroit was the place to start. They figure that unveiling of its 9-foot-tall monument will go over acceptably too in Seattle, San Freakcisco, nyc, DC (in front of the Demoncrap National Committee Hall of Devil Worship) and Shotcago.

The upcoming sorta paraphrasing reprise of a South Park parody unveiled the one-ton likeness of a mix of demoncrap politicians just before 11:30 p.m. local time as supporters cheered, "hellary, hellary." Some of the heathens in attendance rushed to loot stuff, only to find Deadtroit is pretty much void of lootable places now.

The statue of a winged Baphoman – combining features from leading demoncraps – with body parts bought from Panned Parenthood, the head of the DNC chairpoison, and race/gender neutral with the Marie Barf hashtag “#DemoncrapLiesDon'tMatter”, resembled a design the group previously tried to get as the new demoncrap party icon. A nearby statue of a boy was removed because of the politically correct demand by feminincompoops to not have a 'negative male influence' diminish the display.  The feminincompoops are also demanding that it becalled a "baphowomyn".

Bruce/Caitlyn Jenner's cat, Booger, barked its approval.  Or was just trying to moo up a hairball forcefully. 

Jacked Upp, director of the Deadtroit chapter of the Demoncrap National Committee, said temple members planned to transport the sculpture to the Fauxtus home town, soon as they figure out where in Hell it is.

The Temple had unsuccessfully applied to have the statue appointed as hellary's running mate, but realized that because her crimepaign is starting to go to the devil, perhaps that declaration may have to be changed to 'Burnie' Sanders or Fauxcahontas.

On Saturday, the presentation of Baphowomyn in Deadtroit drew applause and adulation from msnbc, wherein the entire staph repeatedly wet themselves in satanic orgasms of joy that they got the statue name politically corrected. It was noted that the Satanic Temple previously tried to display the statue only to fear a backlash from their allies in ISIS scuttled the plan.

"We're sure our friends in ISIS are okay with this now, because Marie Barf is getting them jobs," said Al Barfton over a bullhorn that could be heard at cnn. A souse with msnbc reports that Brian Williams will relate his mission flown over Teheran with the Baphowomyn during the Iran-Iraq War in 1986 where he landed with hellary under sniper fire from the vast Fox News conspiracy. The fact that Fox News didn't begin until 1996 was dismissed by msnbc as being misconstrued dependency on what one's definition of “is” is.  

Seymour isn't thinking about a Pulitzer with this one; he thinks he'll need protection from the DNC.

Don't we all.

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Blogger Sandee said...

Seymour may need protection from ISIS too. I'm just saying.

Great job my favorite pet rock.

Have a rocktastic day. My best to your human. ☺

29 July, 2015 08:17  
Blogger Serena said...

Isn't Seymour too young to be watching South Park? He's a good boy, though, so give him a treat today. Um, what kind of treats do pet rocks like?:)

31 July, 2015 09:36  
Blogger Skunkfeathers said...

Serena, Seymour loves anything that's delivered. He's got the Fire Department on speed dial if I get within 10 feet of the kitchen.

31 July, 2015 10:45  

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