What Does ECOWAS and ACOWSASS Have In Common?

Not much, as it turns out.

Got another one of those improbable letters from a "federal high court" in Benin, telling me about how ECOWAS was going to compensate me for having been scammed.

For only $85.

Not the cheapest scam I've ever been offered, but pretty close.

I should be insulted.

So I edited with that in mind:

On Thursday, March 17, 2016 4:33 AM, Federal Twelve O'Clock High Court <inadera1f.@road.ocn.ne.jp> wrote:

 

Federal Twelve O'clock High Court Of Injustice, Benin.
Address:358 Regis Road, Kentish Town
Benin, NW5 3RR
Tel: +229 99306614
Email (federalhighcourt1@foxmail.com)

Attn.

May it please the Twelve O'clock High Court Of Acowsass Benin Republic are here to make it clear to you that there was a case that was been handling in this ACOWSASS since July 10th 2015 concerning your funds because we got some reports that you did not received your funds since after every story you heard regarding the funds and all type of payments you have be paid to receive the funds but none is received by you.

And we are hereby to know the truth because the person that is in charge of the transaction said in this court here that you have received your funds and confirmed to him that you received your funds.  Funds is funds, but really.

Please we are here to hear the truth from you, because according to the president of this country Dr. Yayi Boni, he told us that you did not receive your funds since last year , he stated that his office did not have your name in file of those who received their funds from Benin Republic. Please bellow is what we want you to answer to enable us to handle this case normal as the reporter said that it has been done to you.

(1)Do you receive any money from Africa............ Oh f**k yes
(2)If you received money from him, how much.............oh f**k, at least $550,000
(3)Through which way, bank or courier do you received the money from......... oh f**k, I guess it was a dozen different couriers stranded around the country
(4) Is it true that you received money through western union ....... oh f**k, no...Money Gram

(5) In which date or year....................... oh f**k, I can't remember...several dates over several years
(6)Which authority approve the file ............. oh f**k if I know...whatever authoritah was signing off on this sh*t from whenst ever and wherest ever the f**k they were

Morenever, the only amount found as your funds $5.8000,000.00 -- in West African francs, making for about $9.95 in USA money last we calculated it on our abacus before a moneky stole it and turned it into a sling shot -- through your names, address and contact mobile details in which we have with us here that proved to us you are the really owner of the said unclaimed funds.

So you are advice to update this court the way you wish whether you will come down in person to collect your fund yourself. And you should Re-confirm your full information to this HIGH COURT as to proof to us That really you are the case client for us to close check with the Information we have with us here in monitoring searchlight system.

A...Your full Name..............
B...Your home address....... 
C......Telephone number......  
D....Your occupation...........     
E....Country..................             
 F...your international passport/or drivers license /or state I.D.      

Also forward the major e-mail they used to scam you because we needs it for more investigation in order to see if any of it wind up on Hellary Clinton's email server.  We could ask the Russians and Chinese about it, but we'd rather hear from you.

I mean their names, their emails, their phone numbers and office Addresses. According to our programs and constitutions, you are advise to come down to this county Benin Republic to appear before this court And sign your proper paper and collect your funds from us hand to Hand.  Don't believe all the stories you hear about planes full of foreigners crashing here.  I assert to you that no plane has crash here in the past five minutes.  Not at least that's landed in earshot.

Remember, the reason why we advice you to come down in person to collect your fund yourself is because many Peoples were complaining about Fraudsters every day from Benin Republic and we aren't trying to stop this fraudulent from Benin; we just want to hear about it because it give us a Chris Matthews tingle in our leggings like he get from obola.

And we want you to you keep this (FHC-2090) because this will ensure that when the Demoncrap National Committee, chairpoisoned by Debbil Washedup Schitz who moonlights as Medusa, finds you, they can use it to send you to the FEMA camp that hellary wants you in for telling everyone she wears 5 XXL butt thongs. And as soon as you comply with your full contact information requested, we will forward everything to the Benin presidency office to laugh our f**king asses off.

Get back to us soonest...our operators are standing by.  Well okay, one is sitting by being eaten by army ants and it would help if someone would respond.

With the sum of $85, you get in addition to scammed, a free autographed picture of Hellary Clinton in that 5 XXL butt thong; authentication that your email that passed through her primate server has been shared with Russian and Chinese intelligence; a sexting picture of Barney Fwank; and an invitation to Hellary's inaugural speech from the Federal Correctional facility she'll be in after being indicted for all the sh*t she's done.  And it only costs you $85.

Without wasting time, if you choose to send $85 for the Minister Imprinter, meaning you should get back to us the payment information.

We are hereby assuring you that nothing useful will come of this unless you send us $85; nothing useful will come of this whether you send $85 or not.

Thanks.
Best Regard.

Chief Ass Inspector: Mr. John Ali
Tourist Cannibal Taco Supreme

Kangaroo Court of Appeals of Laughter, Benin
Phone; +229 99306614

 

Most times, an edit like that ends the communication.  But there are some scammers out there that consider a reply -- ANY REPLY (and obviously one they ain't read) -- to be a signal to proceed.  And that's what I gots h'yar:

 

 

Federal High Court Of Justice, Benin.

Address:358 Regis Road, Kentish Town

Benin, NW5 3RR

Tel: +229 99306614

Email (federalhighcourt625@gmail.com)

Attention:  

This is to acknowledge the receipt of your email and to let you know that we receive the information you email us, We the federal High Court Of Ecowas Benin Republic are here to make it clear to you that everything concerning this issue has being handling normal, The suspect will go through Alot of pain for scaming you so all you need to do now is to send the sum of $85 so that the Minister Imprinter will sign out your fund certificate as the rightful beneficiary of this funds worth the sum of US$2,500,000.

From today hence forth any email your receive should be forwarded to us for verification so to avoid you from any other scammers/Impostor, I Mr, John Ali will make sure you receive your funds if you comply with me fully by following my instruction so kindly send the $85 through Western Union or Money Gram with the below information.

Receiver's Name: Dubem Nwaozuzu

Country: Benin Republic

City: Cotonou

Amount: $85 Only

Question: When

Answer: Now

I will be waiting for you to get back to me with the $85 payment information for the immediate release of your funds so get back to me as soon as possible.

Thanks.

Best Regard.

Chief Judge: Mr. John Ali

Supreme Court of Appeal, Benin

Phone; +229 99306614  

 

 

Fancy that...my character was originally entitled to $5.8 million.  Now it's just $2.5 million.  Hokayyyyyyyyy:

 

Now just a gall durn minute h'yar...yore aboriginal email said ah wuz entitled to $5.8 million.  NOW it's only $2.5 million???  What are you goat poking egg suckers at ACOWSASS trying to put over on me???  Where the goat f**k is my other $3.3 million???  

 

*Jeopardy Theme whilst we await their understanding soonest of my reply*

This is to acknowledge the receipt of your email and to let you know that we receive the information you email us, We the federal High Court Of Ecowas Benin Republic are here to make it clear to you that everything concerning this issue has being handling normal, The suspect will go through Alot of pain for scaming you so all you need to do now is to send the sum of $85 so that the Minister Imprinter will sign out your fund certificate as the rightful beneficiary of this funds worth the sum of US$5,800,000.

From today hence forth any email your receive should be forwarded to us for verification so to avoid you from any other scammers/Impostor, I Mr, John Ali will make sure you receive your funds if you comply with me fully by following my instruction so kindly send the $85 through Western Union or Money Gram with the below information.

Receiver's Name: Dubem Nwaozuzu

Country: Benin Republic

City: Cotonou

Amount: $85 Only

Question: When

Answer: Now

I will be waiting for you to get back to me with the $85 payment information for the immediate release of your funds so get back to me as soon as possible.  

 

These lads crack me up.

 

Now, in the world of customer service, when a legitimate business screws up, sometimes they'll waive fees as a sign of good faith.  Do ya think that mebbe...:
 

 

It's nice of you to give me back the $3.3 million USD that you took away in the previous email.  Now, if you were REALLY interested in good customer service -- after such a gaffe -- you would offer me NO FEE for my money.  Do you believe in customer service? 

*More Jeopardy Theme*

Sadly, when my character introduced the notion of "customer service" to Scamland, the scammers apparently saw that as a 'trigger word', tucked their tails and ran to cower and wet themselves in their safe zones, pretty much like political correctness lefties at a college campus.

*needle dragging across Jeopardy Theme recording...*

 

Not What Benin Had In Mind

The scammer came up with what he thought was a cheap and simple scam that would net him lots of small amounts.

The edit went small, alright...

Here is the scam:

Address: No. 51  Avakpa, Western Union Cotonou, Benin

Office Telephone: +229-99935539.E-mail:    westernunionspoof@inbox.lv

 

THIS REQUIRED AN URGENT RESPOND.

                      

AS MATTER OF URGENT WE ARE CALLING ON YOUR URGENT ATTENTION CONCERN YOUR FUNDS, PLEASE DO THE BEST YOU CAN TO GET US THE REQUIRED FEE OF $39 THIS IS BECAUSE THE INTERNATIONAL MONETARY FUND (IMF) HAVE  INSTRUCTED TO RETURN THE PAYMENT FILE BACK IF ANY BENEFICIARY HAS FAILED TO CLAIM HIM OR HER FUNDS WITHIN 72 HOURS. WE HAVE DONE OUR BEST TO ASK THEM TO HAVE PATIENTS WITH YOU TILL THE GIVEN DATE BUT THEY DON'T SEEM TO UNDERSTAND. WE ARE THE ONE HOLDING THEM FOR VERY LONG TIME .THIS IS THE INSTRUCTION ALERT WE RECEIVED TODAY.

 

NOTE; WE ARE INSTRUCTED BY THE IMF TO RETURN THE PAYMENT FILE WITHIN 72 HOURS IF THE BENEFICIARY DID NOT COMPLY TO CLAIM HIS/HER FUNDS. WE ARE NOW CALLING ON YOUR URGENT ATTENTION TO RESPONSE TO THIS EMAIL ONCE YOU RECEIVE IT AND DO THE BEST YOU CAN TO SEND REPLY TOGETHER WITH PAYMENT INFORMATION OF THE NEEDED $39 SO THAT YOU WILL START RECEIVING YOUR PAYMENT TO AVOID THE IMF BEEN TAKEN THE FUNDS BACK IN NEXT 72 HOURS.

 

HOWEVER, YOU ARE ADVISED TO GO AHEAD AND SEND THE HOME LAND SECURITY CLEARANCE FEE OF $39 VIA WESTERN UNION OR MONEY GRAM SO THAT WE WILL ASSIST YOU AND OBTAIN THE CERTIFICATE FROM THE CONCERNED OFFICE, BECAUSE THAT IS THE ONLY THING HOLDING YOUR FUNDS OKAY.  HERE IS THE INFORMATION YOU WILL USE TO SEND THE MONEY.

 

RECEIVER NAME: Olusanya Omobolanle Olushola

CITY/COUNTRY: COTONOU - BENIN REPUBLIC.

QUESTION: NOW

ANSWER: YES

AMOUNT: $39 DOLLARS

MTCN: 

SENDER NAME: 

COUNTRY:

PHONE NUMBER:

 

DO SEND US THE MTCN NUMBERS AS SOON AS YOU MADE THE PAYMENT. IF YOU CAN SEND THE FEE TODAY, YOU WILL PICK UP THE FIRST PAYMENT AND WE WILL SEND YOU ANOTHER $4,000 TODAY AS THE CLEARANCE CERTIFICATE IS THE ONLY THING HOLDING THE TRANSFER.

 

YOU WILL START RECEIVING YOUR PAYMENT IN NEXT 2 HOURS OF RECEIVING SAID FEE FROM YOU. WE ARE ADVISING YOU TO DO THE BEST YOU CAN AND GET US THE SAID MONEY TODAY AND YOU WILL START RECEIVING YOUR PAYMENT IN 2 HOURS OF SENDING THE FEE TO US. MEANWHILE WE ADVISE YOU TO FORWARD TO US YOUR DIRECT PHONE NUMBER FOR FAST UPDATE ONCE WE MADE YOUR PAYMENT WHEN FORWARDING THE PAYMENT DETAILS.

 

SINCERELY,

REV. MARK JAMES

+229-99935539  

 

 

I love how so many of these scammers think that representing themselves as reverends will get them anywhere.  I mean, look how it works for the massive racebaiter and tax cheat, "Rev" Al Sharpton?

 

That's probably why they think that.

 

At any rate, I didn't shrink from the edit...but shrinkage did figure in:

 

 

Address: No. 51  Avakpa, Western Union Cotonou, Benin

Office Telephone: +229-99935539.
E-mail:    westernunionspoof@inbox.lv

 

THIS REQUIRED AN URCHIN RESPOND.  IF YOU NOT HAVE URCHIN TO RESPOND, WE WAIT WHILE YOU GET ONE.                      

AS MATTER OF URGENT WE ARE CALLING ON YOUR URGENT ATTENTION CONCERN YOUR GENITAL FUNGUS, PLEASE DO THE BEST YOU CAN TO GET US THE REQUIRED FUNGUS RELIEF THAT COST ONLY $39 THIS IS BECAUSE THE INTERNATIONAL GENITAL FUNGUS FUND (IGFF) HAVE  INSTRUCTED TO RETURN ALL GENITAL FUNGUS BACK IF ANY BENEFICIARY HAS FAILED TO ADMIT TO HAVING GENITAL FUNGUS AND NOT PAID TO MEDICATE IT WITHIN 72 HOURS. WE HAVE DONE OUR BEST TO EXPLAIN TO THEM THAT HERE IN BENIN, EVERYONE HAS GENITAL FUNGUS -- IT'S THAT FUNGUS AMONGUS THAT BINDS, ITCHES AND BLEEDS -- BUT THEY DON'T SEEM TO UNDERSTAND.  SO HERE WE ARE, HOLDING UP YOUR END OF THE GENITAL FUNGUS FOR VERY LONG TIME.  TODAY THEY SEND US THIS NEW INSTRUCT ALERT WE RECEIVED TODAY.

 

NOTE:  E FLAT.  WE ARE INSTRUCT BY THE IGFF TO RETURN THE GENITAL FUNGUS OINTMENT WITHIN 72 HOURS IF THE BENEFICIARY DID NOT COMPLY TO CLAIM HIS/HER GENITAL FUNGUS OINTMENT. WE ARE NOW CALLING ON YOUR URCHIN ATTENDANTS TO RESPONDS TO THIS EMAIL ONCE YOU RECEIVE IT AND DO THE BEST YOU CAN TO SEND REPLY TOGETHER WITH URCHIN INFORMATION OF THE NEEDED SO THAT DISPENSE OF OINTMENT AT $39 A SMEAR FROM TUBE CAN BE SENDED TO YOU SO THAT YOU MAY NOT WIND UP WITH GENITAL FUNGUS AS IT IS AMONGUS HERE IN BENIN, WHERE IT BINDS US, IRRITATES US AND MAKES OUR TALLYWHACKERS BLEED.  

 

AND FOR THE NEXT 5000 RESPONDENT URCHINS WE HAVE THIS SPECIAL:  ORDER NOW AND WE WILL PAY FOR YOU THE HOME LAND SECURITY CLEARANCE FEE OF $39, ABSOLUTELY FREE.  YES, THAT IS ABSOLUTELY FREE.  MOST GENEROUS OF US, HUH?  BE AMONGUS THE FIRST 5000 RESPONDENTS AND WE WILL ASSIST YOU AND OBTAIN THE OINTMENT FROM THE CONCERNED OFFICE, ABSOLUTELY FREE, BECAUSE THAT IS THE ONLY THING HOLDING YOUR GENITAL FUNGUS IN CHECK, IF IT LIKE OURS.  HERE IS THE INFORMATION YOU WILL USE TO GET YOUR FREE OINTMENT THAT WE WILL PAYS FOR.

 

RECEIVER NAME: Olusanya Omobolanle Olushola Onot That Of**kface Ogun

CITY/COUNTRY: COTONOU - BENIN REPUBLIC.

QUESTION: WTF

ANSWER: YOU EXPECT US TO KNOW?

AMOUNT: NOTHING...FEE WAIVED FOR THE FIRST 5000 RESPONDENT URCHINS

DO SEND US CONFIRMATION WHEN YOU RECEIVE OINTMENT AND PROGRESS REPORTS ON IF IT ACTUALLY WORKS OR NOT.  IT WAS MADE BY A WITCH DOCTOR HERE THAT USUALLY ONLY MANAGE TO SHRINK STUFF.  THAT WHY WE WANT YOU TO TEST IT FIRST.  

 

YOU WILL START RECEIVING YOUR OINTMENT IN NEXT 2 HOURS OF OUR RECEIVING YOUR ABSOLUTELY FREE RESPOND FROM YOU. WE ARE ADVISING YOU TO DO THE BEST YOU CAN AND GET US THE SAID RESPOND TODAY AND YOU WILL START RECEIVING YOUR GENITAL FUNGUS OINTMENT IN 2 HOURS OF SENDING THE ABSOLUTELY FREE EMAIL TO US. MEANWHILE WE ADVISE YOU TO FORWARD TO US YOUR DIRECT PHONE NUMBER FOR FAST UPDATE ONCE WE MADE YOUR OINTMENT AND SHIPPED IT.

 

SINCERELY,

REV. MARK JAMES

+229-99935539

Witch Doctors of Benin UnInc,

(Shrunken) Head Office Benin Republic.

Witch Doctors of Benin UnInc®

When it absolutely positively has to be shrunk overnight Worldwide

With Witch Doctors of Benin UnInc service, shrunken heads and other parts is performed in 15-20 minutes and bank account is not required. We only shrink what you asks us to, guaranteed or your moneys back when applicable.  Title and registration fees extra.  Other offers not applicable since we don't have other offers.  Your results won't vary; ours didn't.  

 

 

No reply was received from the originating scammer, but a previous scammer did object to receiving this with that short phrase the late George Carlin noted "signals the end of the argument".  My response back "that's very small minded of you...been using that ointment, eh?", seemed to put an end to any further dialogue  ;-)

Pygmys And The Band

Pygmys and Foreigner have nothing to do with one another.

Except in a scam email edit.

Witness the following scam received here from the Repugnant of Benin:


PAYMENT REFUND COMMISSION

Payment Refund Commission (PRC) ECOWAS License Office. Republic Du Benin.

Attention, This is a Refund Commission set up by the new President of Republic du Benin, President Thomas Boni Yayi, ECOWAS Chairman

Apr 7

Payment Refund Commission (PRC)

ECOWAS License Office.

Republic Du Benin.

Attention,

This is a Refund Commission set up by the new President of Republic du Benin, President Thomas Boni Yayi, ECOWAS Chairman, in other to help restore the International image of our continents mostly West Africa and to pay compensation to the less privileges and also to fight against corruption in all ECOWAS member countries this year, 2015 with a five Key Agenda. The five key objectives of this Commission are stated thus:

1). To recover and refund to the legal owner any money extorted illegal from any Foreigner

2). To recover and refund to the legal owner any property extorted illegally from any Foreigner

3). To recover and refund to the legal owner any contractual payment denied from any Foreigner

4). To recover and refund to the legal owner any confiscated or diverted payment from any Foreigner

5). To Fish-out and prosecute any illegal act perpetuated against any Foreigner in the country

If you fall in any of the above category or have a case not mentioned where money was extorted from you within West Africa, do not hesitate in contacting this commission with the following details, (1) Your Full Name, (2) Country (3) Address (4) Occupation (5) sex (6) Direct phone number. Our Mission is cogent as well as our objectives while all general efforts are geared towards re-branding the International image of ECOWAS. Thanks for your understanding.

Mr. John Oka

Chairman Payment Refund Commission (PRC)

ECOWAS License Office.

Republic Du Benin,.  

 

 

It doesn't feel like the first time, since I've heard from ECOWAS and Benin before.  But they haven't had this kind of reply before:

 

 

Pygmy Genital Rebush Commission (PGRC)

ACOWSASS License Office.

Republic Du Benin.

Attention,

This is a  genital rebush Commission set up by the new President of Republic du Benin, President Thomas Boni Yayi.  He takes quite an interest in pygmys and their small genitals.  So he has ordered me, the chairman of ACOWSASS to help restore the International image of our continents mostly West Africa and to take long overdue action on pygmy genital rebush compensation to the less privileged pygmys and also to fight against corruption in all ACOWSASS member countries this year, 2015 with a five Key Agenda. The five key objectives of this Commission are stated thus:

1). To discover and rebush the genitals of all pygmy legal owners of lost, stolen and or pillaged pygmy genitals

2). To recover and rebush to the legal pygmy owner any genitals extorted illegally by the rock band Foreigner

3). To recover and rebush for the legal pygmy owner any sex toys denied to them by the rock group Foreigner

4). To recover and rebush to the legal pygmy owner any confiscated or diverted genitals by the rock group Foreigner

5). To Fish-out and prostitute any illegal pygmy not cooperative of this commission even if the rock band involved is not Foreigner 

If you fall in any of the above category don't worry; you're a pygmy and don't have far to fall.  ACOWSASS intends this program to start out in West Africa, but do not worry because we plan to expand this to the basement of the DNC and what's left of Detroit by the end of 2015.  To precipitate, act like a cloud and rain.  Otherwise, please to use your pygmy keyboard in contacting this commission with the following details, (1) Your Full Name, (2) Country (3) Address or a pygmy bunny suit with the hands and feet (4) Occupation (5) sex (6) Direct phone number or drum code. Our Mission is cogent as well as our objectives while all general efforts are geared towards re-bushing the International pygmy genital image of ACOWSASS. Thanks for your understanding.

Mr. John Oka

Chairman Pygmy Genital Rebushing Commission (PRGC)

ACOWSASS License Office.

Republic Du Benin,.  

 

 

Nothing back from ECOWAS, Benin or pygmys.  Foreigner might call me a dirty white boy, but we already knowd that...

A New Year, An Old Scam Edit and a Laughing Scammer

An old scam idea recycled late in 2014 that looks just like this:




FEDERAL MINISTRY OF FINANCE NATIONAL HOUSE OF ASSEMBLY COMPLEX
SENATE HOUSE - UPPER CHAMBERS WUSE DISTRICT, COTONOU BENIN
Our Ref: FGN /SNT/STB

HELLO
ARE YOU DEAD OR ALIVE? IF YOUR DEAD YOU BETTER STAY DEAD AND IF YOUR
LIVING YOU BETTER READ THIS:


IF YOU FAIL TO SEND THE $45 THIS WEEK YOUR $2.500, 000.00 IS GONE

I have to inform you again, that we are not playing over this, I know
my reason for the continuous sending of this notification to you, the
fact is that you can't seem to trust any one again over this payment
for what you have been in cantered in many months ago, but I want you
to trust me, I cannot scam you for $45 it is for bank processing of
your payment, the fees of $45 is clearly written to you before, I did
not invent the bill to defraud you of $45 it is an official bank
payment processing fee, and the good part of this, is that you will
never, ever be disturbed again over any kind of payment, this is
final, and the forms from there becomes effective once we submit your
payment application processing fee and pay the form fee of $45 I don't want
you to loose this fund this time, because you may never get another
such good opportunity, the federal government is keen and very
determined to pay your overdue debts, this is not a fluke, I would not
want you to loose this fund out of ignorance, I will send you all the
documents as soon as bank payment processing fee is paid, you have to
trust me, you will get your fund, find a way to get $45 you will not
loose it,instead it will bring your financial breakthrough, find the
money and send it to our bursary.


The reason why am sending you this because I want you to receive your
USD2.5M immediately as we are trying to round up for this payment program.
The processing charges which was initially on the high price has been
cut down by the payout bank considering the poor economic situations
that make it difficult for the middle class citizens to meet up with
the processing charges of their entitlement. Upon the confirmation of
your processing charges you will get your $2.500, 000.00 into your
account within 15hrs.

Here is the payment information through western union money transfer
or money gram money transfer, finally my advice to you is not to
abandon this transaction because of the requirement of ($45)

Account Officer Info:.


Receiver's first Name: Johnson Emma
City:::::::::::::: Cotonou
Country: ::::::::Benin Republic
Text Question: ::::::code
Answer::::::::code
Amount required: :::::::$45
Sender's Name:::::
MTCN Number#:
Sender's address:

As soon as the payment is received today, you will receive your $2.5M
the same today without any delay.

Best Regards
Mrs.Jones Wanette  




I decided to make it one of my final edits of 2014, and how to open up 2015 and my 16th year of scambaiting.  It went thus:




On Saturday, December 13, 2014 12:34 AM, Mrs.Jones Wanette gave birth to a 20 lb vaginal turd <rcrobi521@gmail.com> and being ridded thus of Elizabeth Warren's brain, then wrote:

FEDERAL MINISTRY OF DUBIOUS DEMOCRAP FINANCIAL CHICANERY
DNC HOUSE - HEADS UP OUR ASSES DISTRICT,

WASHINGTON, DC
Our Ref: FGN /SNT/STB

HELLO
IZ YOU DEAD OR ALIVE?

IF YOU IZ DEAD YOU BETTER STAY DEAD AND

IF YOUR LIVING YOU BETTER READ THIS.

IF YOU'RE DEBBIE WASSERMAN SCHULTZ, IT

DON' MATTER WHAT YOU IZ...YOU'Z UGLY

EITHER WAY:


IF YOU FAIL TO SEND THE $45 THIS WEEK YOUR

INFLATABLE MANATEE SEX TOY IS GONE

I have to inform you again, that we are not playing over this, I know
my reason for the continuous sending of this notification to you, the
fact is that you can't seem to trust any one again after your previous

inflatable manatee sex toy deflated during fallating your pet duck.

but I want you to trust me, I cannot scam you out of a $45 inflatable

manatee sex toy, because my genitals is allergic to inflatable

manatee.  And snake bites.

I had a fantasy about you involving Preparation H and jelly donuts;

don't ask me, I just had it.

you will never, ever be disturbed again once you'd tried sex with an

inflatable manatee sex toy.  You simply can't GET any more disturbed

after that.  And once we submit your name to the inflatable manatee

sex toy protection program, it all good and I don't want to hear about

the psychological distress your pet duck suffered with the failed

fallating.

Ducks will do anything.  Just watch road side dead ones get lined up

on and done.  Necrophiliquacks.

the federal government under obola and even bigger pervs therein

is keen and very determined to make you get your inflatable manatee

sex toy as part of the obolacare fraud.  This is not a fluke; the inflatable

manatee sex toy looks good in and out of barlighting, unlike Sandra, who

is barely tolerable in barlighting, and a room clearer in the light of day.

I will send you all the documents that Professor Gruber made up

during his paid and personal workings with obola during the

obolacare stupidity campaign.

You has to trust me, I'm a democrap.  find a way to get $45 and sent it

to us because Swillary needs more botox before she mounts her broom to

start her campaign swing.

The reason why am sending you this because I want you to be among the

first 1000 persons to order this special $45 inflatable manatee sex toy; if you

are, you get a SPECIAL PRIZE:  an inflatable al Sharpton sex toy that bends

over the news media of msnbc and cnn ON AIR!  And you could be one of the

lucky* 1000 to receive this ABSOLUTELY FREE!!!**

Here is the payment information through western union money transfer
or money gram money transfer, finally my advice to you is not to
abandon this transaction because of the requirement of ($45)

Account Officer Info:.


Receiver's first Name: Jarrett Valerie
City:::::::::::::: Washington
Country: ::::::::DC
Text Question: ::::::What Is Uglier Than Me?
Answer::::::::Harry Reid's Genital Warts
Amount required: :::::::$45
Sender's Name:::::
MTCN Number#:
Sender's address:

As soon as the payment is received today, you will receive your inflatable

manatee sex toy -- fallatable pet ducks not included -- and if you're among

the first 1000 respondents, you get that al Sharpton yucky thing ABSOLUTELY

FREE!!! 

Best Regards

Lois Lerner

*  our definition of 'lucky' may differ significantly from yours..but we're progressive butt polyps, and we are pretty sure we know what's best

**  the shrinking pool of working taxpayers will get stuck with any costs like we stick them with everything else we f*** up...  

Of course I made it a point to copy this to the Democrap National Commie-ttee.  Wherefrom, it drew no response.

But one scammer who's dealt with my edits before, was apparently amused to see what I done to some of his peers:

Dangote Alico says  hahahahaha!!  

Maybe the zen master is finally getting through to him...