Politically Correct Gestapo Barbie? **UPDATE**

Author's Update:  December 2016 brings lots of news.

Not all of it good.

Like for example, Hollyweird -- running out of movie ideas -- wants to make a Barbie movie.

Yes, that Barbie.

But they want to use very unBarbie looking Amy Schumer.

*sound of phonograph needle going off record sideways along with a multi-voiced WTF???*

Welcome to imagination and intellect bankrupt Hollyweird on the eve of 2017.  At any rate, since this is a *thing*, the blog author thought he'd revisit a take on Barbie from the summer of 2015, long as we're being imagination bankrupt:


Really?

Yeah...in Obola's hoax and change warped world, I can see this. 

"Hello Barbie" reputed to be an actual NSA mole.

One that's got feminincompoops going crazy over her politically incorrect looks.  But not her intent.

And Barbie thought her problems were over when she dumped genital-less Ken.

Here's a snippet from the article that got this 'thing' started:


In what has got to be one of the creepier consumer moves of recent years, Mattel has launched a new Barbie doll that can record childrens’ voices and upload them to the internet. Come Autumn of 2015, the ‘Hello Barbie’ doll will facilitate two-way conversations between children and their dolls. While the ostensible purpose of this technology is to create a doll that has seemingly organic conversations with kids, it’s difficult to not see this as yet another strange Orwellian surveillance tool.

As of yet, there is no direct evidence that the dolls will actually be spying on the kids in real time, but we do know they will be archiving everything the children say in a database, likely to be sold to data mining companies.  

And in the hoax 'n change Obolaland, that could also mean that access to what kids are saying is made available to...the N...S...A.

Which of course would only be the first step in the twisted world of Obola's Marxian makeover of Amerika.  Obola's demented of justice would probably then require Mattel to give Barbie specific questions to ask their human pre-adolescent hosts.  Things like:

"Do your mommy and daddy listen to that hatemonger Rush Limbaugh?"

"Are your parents unfair to other kids by reading to you before you go to bed?"

"Are your parents racist by making you peanut butter 'n jelly sandwiches?"

"Are your parents homophobic by being heterosexual?"

"Is your sister a pro-life anti-woman bigot?"

"Is your brother a sexist pig by having pictures of Taylor Swift on his wall instead of Caitlyn Jenner?"

"Have any of your friends ever criticized the rioters in Baltimore?"

"Please tell us the name and address of anyone you hear making negative comments about hitlary...er..hillary".

And with that, "Hello Barbie" becomes "Indoctrination Barbie".

Of course, the Nazis were way ahead of Mattel with their own Barbie:

Klaus was a concept that Obola apparently likes.  Certainly political correctness dweebs on college campi these days are in love with it.

Even if she sounds stupider than a Marie Barf nuanced hashtag.

Now, to be fair -- *snerx* -- Mattel hasn't announced that this is the intended plan for "Hello Barbie".  Of course, they'd never admit to it if it were.  Just like Obola knows nothing about what he's done until he hears about it on the news...

At any rate, that's the latest news on the latest version of Barbie coming to stores near you this year.

Which will offend the feminincompoops because she's still too feminine and perfect looking.  From what we hear, Mattel is working on that:

A lot of the Left will have problems with assorted aspects of this fix, so Mattel will go on trying to fix it until absolutely NO ONE (on the left) is offended.

Which would mean that Non Offensive (to the left) Barbie would wind up looking like this:

Which would offend everyone on the Right, but in toxic Obolaland, that doesn't matter.  

More Illuminincompoop Tweaking

Nigerian, Kenyan..whatever.

The Nigerian Illuminincompoops aren't happy with me.

That inspired me to further their unhappiness.

So I took their auto-response (seen played with a couple of posts ago), and edited it even further.

Which went over like a fart in a diva's photo shoot.

Witness:

YOU ARE WELCOME -- F**K, YOU ARE DESPERATELY NEEDED -- TO THE DILAPIDATED TEMPLE OF THE NIGERIAN ILLUMININCOMPOOPS.

My child it really SUCKS to be one of us, but if you insist i can help you become a member of the Illuminincompoops if only you are completely mugu stupid enough to follow all we will say to you.  Before you apply you have to do the following:

1.  Take a picture with a fish on your head and send it to us.

2.  Sacrifice your favorite pet to our faux deity Ukulele Unga Bunga Horney Boo Boo.

3.  Marry a goat.

4.  Butt f**k a badger without losing your genital.

5.  Sing the Burundi national anthem using helium.

6.  Put a back up alarm on Hillary Clinton's fat ass...without her knowing.

7.  Explain in 500 words or more why if a sheep is a ram and a donkey is an ass, how that makes a ram in the ass a goose.

8.  List in 1 word or less everything good the democrats did for Detroit.

9.  Tell us in your own words why Boko Haram is an atheist organization that eats pork and rapes tree stumps.

10.  Has South Park ever made an episode about us?  If yes, tell us what season and episode.

Nextly you have to fill this spaces BELOW.

your name in Yoruba;
your country in Spanish;
your state of genital fungus;your Phone number;
your age at the time you tried to screw a sheep;
occupation at the time you screwed the sheep;

finally you must know our secret HAND TO GOAT GENITAL masturbate to join.  

 

 

That got this in reply:

 

 

asshole stop write to us   

 

 

Being the cooperative sort that I'm not, I sent it to them a dozen more times.  And from other email addresses as well.

 

I really don't play well with others.  Especially Nigerian Illuminincompoops  ;-) 

Fed Reserve Or Fed Up?

 Another day, another Obola nose growth.

SOP.

But this is about a scam email I got from one of Obola's minions...Janet Yellen, head of the Federal Reserve.

Well...that's what it claims to be.

Of course it ain't...just another sleazebag scammer.

Probably one that voted for Pinocchio.

Here's how it starts:


FEDERAL RESERVE BANK OF NEW YORK
33 LIBERTY STREET NEW YORK, NY 10045. USA.
NOTIFICATION OF CREDIT FROM BANK FEDERAL RESERVE BOARD NEW YORK.


Urgent Attn:

OFFICIAL NOTICE: this is to notify you that Series of meetings have
been held over the past (1) Month now with the Secretary General of
the United Nations Organization United State of America, which ended
last week It is obvious that you have not received your fund which is
now in the amount of $11,000,000.00 USD (Eleven Million United States
Dollars) as a compensation award to you, due to past corrupt
Governmental Officials who almost held your fund to themselves for
their selfish reasons and some individuals who have taken advantage of
your fund all in an attempt to swindle your fund which has led to
unnecessary delay in the receipt and so many losses from your end.

The National Central Bureau of Interpol enhanced by the United Nations
and Federal Bureau of Investigation FBI have successfully finalize to
boost the exercise of clearing all foreign debts owed to you who have
been found not to have received their Compensation Awards.

Now, how would you like to receive your payment? Because we have two
Method of payment which is by Check or by ATM card?

ATM Card: We will be issuing you a custom pin based ATM card which you
will use to withdraw up to $5000.00 USD (Five Thousand Dollars) per
day from any ATM machine that has the Master Card Logo on it and the
card have to be renewed in 3 years time which is 2016. Also with the
ATM card you will be able to transfer your funds to your local bank
account. Even if you do not have a bank account, the ATM card comes
with a handbook or manual to enlighten you about how to use it.

Check: A cashier check will be issued in your name and you will
deposit it in your Bank for it to be cleared within three working
days.

Your payment would be sent to you via any of your preferred option
above and would be mailed to you via UPS, because we have signed a
contract with UPS which should expire on (17TH) of April. 2015, You
will only need to pay $350.00 Only instead of $550 USD (Five Hundred
and Fifty Dollars). So, if you  pay before April. (17TH). 2015, you
save 300 USD (Three Hundred Dollars).  


And you've got to love how I ended it with the Commie Core math the left has designed.  Paying $350 instead of $550 is a $300 savings.

*DUMBED DOWN ALERT*

This one didn't cry out for an edit; it fairly shrieked for one, so forth I went, making sure to roll references to Mad Madness, Hilarity, the substandard DNC and other assorted angles into the mix:

FEDUP RESERVE BLANK OF NEW YAWHK
33 LIBEL STREET NEW YAWHK, NY 10045. USA.

MORTIFICATION OF CRUDIT FROM BANK FEDUP RESERVE BOARD NEW YAWHK.


Urgent Attn:

OFFICIAL NOTICE: this is to notify you that a series of meetings have
been held over the past how many ever years of human existence, and

not one of them managed a perfect bracket in the Yahoo March Madness

Bracket Challenge.  So what the fuck good were they?

Secretary General of the United Nations Organization -- a "tits on a boar"

sort named Ban Mai Moon -- determined that if only 4% of the betting

population would have picked UAB over Iowa State, a perfect bracket

was more likely than anyone in the Obola regime telling the truth.

Due to current corrupt Governmental Officials who couldn't pick an

NCAA bracket from an old The Gong Show episode on Knuckleheadodian

TV, the current tournament has been declared null and void, and this

year's winner has been declared to be William & Mary.  How this could

be done was as easy as Hillary losing 30,000 emails.  Perhaps even

easier.

The National Central Bureau of Bracket Pickism enhanced by the United Nations
and Fedup Bureau of Inbloviation have successfully finalize to
boost the exercise of clearing all brackets that had Kentucky winning the tournament,

and awarded these games to William & Mary.  Which heretofore shall be knowd

and Mary & William, to make up for years of gendrification, sexualcation and

a host of other cations that can be filled in at ones' leisure.

Now, if you were in the running despite not having picked UAB over Iowa St.,

and this declaration has now totally screwed your pooch, worry not:  we intend

to screw your other pets, too.

And in order to defray our costs associated with this hijacking of a Las

Vegas cash cow, it will only cost you $350.00 Only instead of $550 USD (Five Hundred
and Fifty Dollars) that Obola wanted you to pay. So, if you  pay before April. (17TH). 2015, you
save 300 USD (Three Hundred Dollars).

Yes, we used Commie Core math on that, because aliens don't wear purple hats when trading

apples, pencils and pancakes.

Take note that you will have to stop communication with every other
person if you have been in contact with any. Nor may you continue

communication with wombats, platypus or talking Barbie dildos.

Also remember that the only difference between Debbil Washingmachine

Snitz and a pig is the spelling.

Note: Everything has been taken care of...Hillary is erasing your emails

too.  

Note that you have been advice to urgently proceed to the corner of

Western Union and Money Gram and told to meet up with our covert

agent to see to all the modalities and other sordid shit associated with

anything done by democraps.  

Contact's Name: Mr. David Wing Wang Wong Wong Wong
Address: 155 Anal Canal Street New Yawhk, NY 10003
AMOUNT TO SEND $350.00 DOLLARS ONLY in uninflated

dildos disguised as cucumbers.

Kindly get back to us as well with all the phone numbers of virgins

you might know who have never heard of Bill Clinton and like the

idea of being an intern genital humidor.

Your amended brackets with Mary & William as winner will be sent to

you via Nancy Pelosi's Flying Broom Service within 2 working days upon
confirmation that none of this email is in the hands of Trey Gowdy.

We are so sure of everything that's misreported by msnbc that we are

we are giving you a 100% Guarantee that you will get nothing good out

of this.  

Email Hillary immediately because it takes her time to get rid of incriminations.

Note That Because Of fraud and impostors in the DNC, We Hereby Issued

You Our Code Of Misconduct, Which Is (WTF-2015) So You Have To Indicate This Code
When replying back to us  By Using It As Your Subject.

Thanks for getting bent over by the Democrap National Crimeity while we looking
forward to serving ourselves gooder at your expense.  Marie Harf is working on

nuancing that so you can't understand it. 

 

Mrs. Janet Yellen

Janet Smellin' Yellen
Director Fedup Reserve Blank New Yawhk,
Fedup Reserve Broad helps undermine strong communities
by creating messes like Deadtroit, Benghazi, Yemen, et al.  

Much as I appreciate bad math and a worse email from the Fed, I reckon they didn't appreciate the response h'yar...