Politically Correct Gestapo Barbie? **UPDATE**
Author's Update: December 2016 brings lots of news.
Not all of it good.
Like for example, Hollyweird -- running out of movie ideas -- wants to make a Barbie movie.
Yes, that Barbie.
But they want to use very unBarbie looking Amy Schumer.
*sound of phonograph needle going off record sideways along with a multi-voiced WTF???*
Welcome to imagination and intellect bankrupt Hollyweird on the eve of 2017. At any rate, since this is a *thing*, the blog author thought he'd revisit a take on Barbie from the summer of 2015, long as we're being imagination bankrupt:
Yeah...in Obola's hoax and change warped world, I can see this.
"Hello Barbie" reputed to be an actual NSA mole.
One that's got feminincompoops going crazy over her politically incorrect looks. But not her intent.
And Barbie thought her problems were over when she dumped genital-less Ken.
Here's a snippet from the article that got this 'thing' started:
In what has got to be one of the creepier consumer moves of recent years, Mattel has launched a new Barbie doll that can record childrens’ voices and upload them to the internet. Come Autumn of 2015, the ‘Hello Barbie’ doll will facilitate two-way conversations between children and their dolls. While the ostensible purpose of this technology is to create a doll that has seemingly organic conversations with kids, it’s difficult to not see this as yet another strange Orwellian surveillance tool.
As of yet, there is no direct evidence that the dolls will actually be spying on the kids in real time, but we do know they will be archiving everything the children say in a database, likely to be sold to data mining companies.
And in the hoax 'n change Obolaland, that could also mean that access to what kids are saying is made available to...the N...S...A.
Which of course would only be the first step in the twisted world of Obola's Marxian makeover of Amerika. Obola's demented of justice would probably then require Mattel to give Barbie specific questions to ask their human pre-adolescent hosts. Things like:
"Do your mommy and daddy listen to that hatemonger Rush Limbaugh?"
"Are your parents unfair to other kids by reading to you before you go to bed?"
"Are your parents racist by making you peanut butter 'n jelly sandwiches?"
"Are your parents homophobic by being heterosexual?"
"Is your sister a pro-life anti-woman bigot?"
"Is your brother a sexist pig by having pictures of Taylor Swift on his wall instead of Caitlyn Jenner?"
"Have any of your friends ever criticized the rioters in Baltimore?"
"Please tell us the name and address of anyone you hear making negative comments about hitlary...er..hillary".
And with that, "Hello Barbie" becomes "Indoctrination Barbie".
Of course, the Nazis were way ahead of Mattel with their own Barbie:
Even if she sounds stupider than a Marie Barf nuanced hashtag.
Now, to be fair -- *snerx* -- Mattel hasn't announced that this is the intended plan for "Hello Barbie". Of course, they'd never admit to it if it were. Just like Obola knows nothing about what he's done until he hears about it on the news...
Which will offend the feminincompoops because she's still too feminine and perfect looking. From what we hear, Mattel is working on that:
Which would mean that Non Offensive (to the left) Barbie would wind up looking like this:
Which would offend everyone on the Right, but in toxic Obolaland, that doesn't matter.