When Scammers Fail To Understand

Lots of scammers operate from pre-designed templates.  Deviation of any kind from that template can have confusing and amusing effects and responses from some scammers.

Like this poor feller/missie:


Urgent Information,
>>
This is to official inform you that United Nations Compensation Commission (UNCC) in conjunction with World Bank Authorities (WBA),
 has after investigation approved your 12,500.000 United States Dollars) outstanding compensation merit reward which was undergoing
 the investigation law of claimant since 5 years now, which has today been released into ATM MasterCard in your name for your urgent/easier
 collection, since MasterCard is 100% active and legit alternatives
claim permit worldwide, and also remain the safe and secure means for
you to receive/collect this fund at no hitch.
>>
Therefore you're advice here to kindly contact the ATM  Management
 office right away with your required details at bottom, which's for
 their recommendation before giving a more information of how you will
get the MasterCard from them successful as agreed.
>>
1. Full Name: ==========
 2. Country: ============
 3. City:================
 4. Home/Office Add:======
 5. Phone:==============
 6. Next of kin: ==========
>> 
 However note when contacting, then make sure you contact the ATM
 managing director: Mr. Paul C. Murphy only/direct on this email:(
 atminfo23@gmail.com ), so you must get his right direction at no
 mislead and be warn to read careful as well to avoid wrong contact
which may lead you wrong which wasn't of the plan in this
compensation.

Thanks & stay bless.

Mrs. Amina J. Mohammed
UN Deputy Secretary-General  

I say "feller/missie" cuz of the response my reply illicited:

Getting right directions from someone at the UN?

I'd be in better hands getting directions from a weasel.  

 

 

It becomes abundantly clear that the 'missie' has given way to a 'feller' in the reply, and that the feller didn't read the reply so good:

 

 

Hello dear,

Thanks for contacting in regards of your compensation of (
$12,500.000.00 USD) here, but for the legal proceed which to suit your
confidential then you're here with two ways alternatives for the
MasterCard collection which based on selection option will determine
if you will have to pay a service fee which to remain on your expense
due to the fact that this MasterCard was already placed into bond
insurance control by the paying authority to which result a legal
forbidden of deduction in any kind until the MasterCard hit into your
care to cash out the fund as it's for security reason.

However advice the option one is for you to visit this office for the
reactivation/collection of this MasterCard in person at no cost of
fee, but if you're unable to make the trip as i explained in option
one, only then you're required to apply this office to perform the
reactivate and shipping of this MasterCard to your destination at your
own little expenses such as,

1) Reactivation Fee: $53 USD
2) Shipment Fee: $110 USD

However the both two payment are total sum ($163 USD Only) while it's
mandatory to be paid if you are unable to make the trip down this
office to perform the service yourself at no cost of fee, therefore
you're hereby to select your choice among the two options and update
me back because i am available and ready now to participate on this
service with you right away based on any of your wish among the two
explained alternatives options for your MasterCard immediate
collection. Finally note: this MasterCard are to be cancel from your
name and forward into Government care account as unclaimed within 7
days if no valid cooperation from you.

I await your considerable option upon the two options above and advice
to only and always contact back with your secured private email for
security and safety MasterCard include our conversation as well
thanks.

Sincerely,

Mr. Paul C. Murphy
General Manager Atm payout Center.  

 

 

Fine...*game ON* in a snarky way:

 

 

So, do you REALLY THINK that I'm going to send $163 to a weasel simply on
your word?  Asking for a friend.

 

This reply obviously didn't fit the anticipated response the scammer expected:

 

 

What do you mean here or what are you thinking of this transaction?  

 

 

And here's where the fun begins...at least for yours truly:

 

 

What do I mean here?  Allow me to 'splain for a friend:

1. The UN is crooked.
2. Weasels aren't to be trusted.
3. Sending you $163 is like sending money to a crooked UN weasel.

If you need further explanation, I'm happy to supply it.  

 

 

...and I followed that with:

 

 

If you need an explanation in a different language, let me know.  

 

 

what?  

 

 

Would you like to try Azerbaijani for example?  In Azerbaijani, it'd look like and mean this: 

Beləliklə, sözünüzün üstünə 163 dollar göndərdiyimi düşünürsünüzmü? Dost istəmək.  

 

 

i do not understand this please.  

 

 

There are at least 180 or more language choices you can make, if English is difficult for you.  Take your time but choose wisely.  

 

 

When that didn't draw a reply, I followed with this:

 

 

Certain language choices do come with a money-back guarantee.  Restrictions apply.  Void where prohibited.  Dealer rebates extra.  

 

 

That drew a reply:

 

 

never mind please  

 

 

I would warn you against choosing Mandarin, Klingon, Ferengi, Dune or Uranusian as a language choice.  They have frequent translation fails.  

 

 

NEVER MIND  

 

 

Liechtensteinian might work out better, if you're remotely sprechen of das Deutsch undt schtuff.  Vas ist los meinen Herr?  

 

 

STOP  

 

 

What, before you fully understand what previously eluded you?  Is that any way to conduct yourself in e flat?  I was just getting on a roll, which is less greasy than a croissant.  Bet you didn't know that.

 

 

Alas, I'll never know if he/she knowd that or not.  No mores would they come to play in the email.  How WILL they ever get their questions answered, behaving this way?