Dying To Be Friends

Yup.  That's how she started it.

Then it took the usual twist into full-blowd Scamland.

She even recruited people to impersonate a bank -- ING -- for authentication.

And that's where it truly fell apart.

But let's start with Ms Alisa Homere, living in the USA but being from Turkey:

Hello my name is  Dr. Alisa Homere, I will like to be friends with you. Can we know each other? please write me back i wait your reply.

 

Thanks

Dr. Alisa Homere  

 

 

Time to play:

 

 

And on what basis shall we develop this friendship?  

 

 

Game is on:

 

 

Welcome my dear 

How is life over there in your location hope pleasing and charitable.I am Dr. Alisa  Homere a Turkish nationality. residing in the United States.  am divorced without child. i am open and good heated woman of loving mind.

Please my dear may i know you and the country where you are living  presently and what you do for a living.

When i get your reply in my next mail i will disclose my main reason of contacting you. Here is my pictures  

 

 

She sent me a few pics, including this one:

 

 

I guess this proves that she's a doctor.  For a few bucks I can get me a certificate that says I'm a gynecologist, but meh:


Well...hello.

I am American.  My ancestors are primarily of northern and central European descent; I am, by blood, distantly related directly to the British Royal Family.

I am, however, a modest and humble man living simply.  I am a widower; my late wife died after 10 years of marriage, without child.  I have not chosen to remarry at this time.

I am currently running a medical marijuana dispensary in Colorado.  Not a user myself, but the industry is new and lucrative here, so it's what I do.

So...what is your main reason for contacting me? 

 

 

Most of which isn't true, but who cares.  She goes on:

 

 

You are highly welcome my dear.thanks for the reply how is today with you. hope fine. Like i said in my previous mail .My name is Dr. Alisa  Homere a Turkish nationality. residing in the United States.  Born June 20, 1980 . I had to contact you in this way because I want to do something very important. This will seem a little suspect true that you do not know me, and I do not know you either. I suffer from cancer of the lungs that is terminally ill, as a medical doctor with the stage of my illness i don't think i will make it up to 45 days from now due to the disease have grow and spread differently in my body. 

 

I am a divorce woman and I have no child of my own. I plan to donate all my property to charity homes and the less privilege if you can promise me that you will be hobble and trustworthy to follow my instruction to share this fund us$860,000 Dollars to the less privilege i have work for in my life get back to me with your full details as follows

Your full names: ........

Your address: ...........

Post code: ...............

City: ........................

Your Age: ................

Country: ..................

Telephone number: ...

Profession: ..............

By the special grace of God when the money enters your position take us$160,000 only and share the rest accordingly as directed you for me to have rest in the booze of my creator.

I await your immediate response and your complete information,

Dr. Alisa  Homere

+15048142576 

 

 

By most scam substandards, this one is pretty chinsy.  Only $160,000 for me and the rest for "booze of my creator".

 

I can imagine why her "creator" probably has a booze problem, but I digress.

 

 

I respond:

 

 

You're dying and have no one to see to your last wish?  Well...you've come to the right place.  I'm as hobble a person as you'll find.   (and I provide her the requested info from one of my most reliable and hobble scambaiting characters).

 

She replies:

 

I am happy to read from you, Mostly what i need from you is prayers and to assist the less privilege. I have noted your contact information's which i am going to forward to the bank now on your behalf to transfer the money to you as my appointed relation to receive the money also i will appreciate you to contact the bank with the below details that you are from Dr. Alisa Homere and have ask you to receive the amount i have in there bank into your own account please i need your prayers much because i don't know what tomorrow will tell in my life.  Here is the information of the bankING BANK A.S (Formerly Oyak Bank A.s.)
Eski Buyukdere Cd. Ayazaga Koy Yolu 16
34398 Maslak, Istanbul Turkey
Tel: + 905399127862
Fax: 90 212 286 61 00
Email: ingbsa@uymail.com
Email:  ErwinOljslager@gmail.com
Contact Person: Mr. Erwin Olijslager
Chief Financial Officer

God bless you and your family

Best Regards.
Dr.  Alisa  Homere+15048142576   

Curious that you live in the USA but still bank in Turkey.

Eh...I tend to notice the minutiae. 

Bank:  please note the last email below and respond.  

 

 

Meantime, she goes on:

 

 

It was nice to read from you? How are you dear.

Please i need prayers from you because my health is not all that sound.

Also have you contacted the bank for the transfer?

I am waiting for your reply.  

 

 

Yes, I reckon it was nice for you to hear from me?

Yes, I did write to your bank. 

Yes, I did hear from your bank.   

Thanks and God bless you. Don't forget to tell me as you receive the money from the bank.

I want to take my drugs and have some relaxation.  Waiting for your massage dear.  

 

 

Too bad you're not here...I've got some doobage doobage doo that would knock the socks right offa your ills.  Better than a massage.  Affordable too, kinda.  

 

 

My dear how are you, I bless God today that i am a little better.  Please let me know your conclusion with the bank when they will transfer the money to you.  

 

 

No sweat, Babycakes.  You'll be the first to hear...unless you're dead.  Then you'll be second, third or somewhere later.  

 

 

In the meantime, my character is having something of a different exchange with her ING Bank:

 

 

 ING BANK A.SING BANK A.S (Formerly Oyak Bank A.s.)
Eski Buyukdere Cd. Ayazaga Koy Yolu 16
34398 Maslak, Istanbul Turkey
Tel: +905399127862
Fax: 90 212 286 61 00

Re:ibas/jne/023

Date: 26/02/2019

Attn. Mr. Jack N. Ewehoff

With due respect,

On behalf of the board and members of staff of the above named finance hereby depose as follows, to out wise you that your details has been received in our firm.

To enable us proceed with the transfer of this fund, do reconfirm and forward to us the below details of yours

1. Full Name

2. Bank account details

3. A photocopy of your international passport or any proof of your identity.

4. Address

5. Phone Number

Await your response.

Feel free to contact the undersigned for clarification.

Your Faithfully.
Mr. Erwin Olijslager
Chief Financial Officer
Email: ErwinOljslager@gmail.com
ING BANK A.S (Formerly Oyak Bank A.s.)  

 

 

First, I would like your bona fides for confirmation.  

 

 

We don't underdtand what you mean try to clear us with your word.    

 

 

 bona fides:  your authentication

I would like you to authenticate yourself then we can proceed    

What do you mean this is a bank 
 

 Well I know that's what you CLAIM to be.  Anyone can go online and say "I'm a bank".

While all the while, not being a bank.  For all I know, you're a bank of fawg.

So I want authentication from you that proves you're a bank. 

Every legitimate bank can authenticate themselves by providing their "bona fides".

Provide me yours.  Then we can proceed.  Surely that's a word you can grasp?  

 

 

*JEOPARDY THEME MUSIC*...and here's what we waited for:


you has to come here to our bank to compete this transaction since you have this view.


Since you don't have a living clue what 'bona fides' and 'authentication' means, perhaps you'll understand this:  FAT F***ing CHANCE.  I am NOT traveling to a Third World crap hole to an unauthenticated "bank" just because your nose is out of joint and you can't do something as simple as authenticating your status as a bank.  A river could; fawg could.  You need to. Figure it out if you expect to do business with me.

 

it is clear that you are not serious about this business.  pls get serious or stop contacting us.


I'll have you know that I'm as serious as painful rectal itch is to a snake that hasn't a finger to scratch it with.  Think about that visual while you ponder your next reply carefully.


Sadly, they did ponder it...and ended all contact.


I guess they're no longer dying to be friends...