Tuesday, April 4, 2017

The AMC Ambassador Sucked Too

There are ambassadors and there are ambassadors.

This is NOT an AMC Ambassador.

The email I just got allegedly from a former US ambassador, isn't one either.

It wouldn't even jump that bridge with James Bond at the wheel.

Here we go with an ambassadorian scam of fraudulent antecedence (and probably vetted in their usual substandard manure by the Counterfeit News Network):


I am Mrs Jendayi Elizabeth Frazer, Former U.S.A Ambassador to South Africa.
With reference to your entitlement fund and in line with the CHANGE OF BENEFICIARY'S APPLICATION.    Please email response soonest please.  



All I dun with this was to edit the original email and make her a former ambassador to Nigeria.

Eh.

That illicited this response from a somewhat indignant ambassadette:

Good Day Jack , 
Kindly be advised that this transaction is very serious and that my email communication with you is official and is been monitored by the U.S consulate RCPT server. 
Since you did not authorize Mrs. Holly L Mc Beath claims to your funds, let me take my time once more to reaffirm my position to you. I am the former United State Ambassador to South Africa kindly find  my attached ID Card in this mail. I worked with the U.S Consulate to South Africa, located at 333 E 38th St, New York, NY 10016, USA and my biography can be confirmed online with this link  https://web.archive.org/web/20090219150626/http://www.state.gov/r/pa/ei/biog/56774.htm
You are the actual recipient of this email, and we have considered the truth in Mrs. Holly L McBeath  alleged claims of your demise but it is not too late to claim what is actually yours. 
During my regime, we (The U.S Consulate) recovered so many unpaid entitlement funds due to citizens of the United States among which yours is included as a beneficiary of the United Nations Entitlement Funds Program (UNEFP) hosted in South Africa. We managed to disburse the said funds of US$7 Million to each beneficiary included during my stay but unfortunately we were unable to locate you, and then this claims from Mrs. Holly L McBeath has resurrected your payment file and she is on the verge to claim it but today as God may have it we have now found you and as part of the oat I swore to always carryout my duty to citizens of the United Nations, I will make sure you receive your entitlement funds valued US$7,000.000 and also, I can now assure you that we have received further instructions to deduct the cost of transfer Fee and Income Tax from your US$7 Million and transfer the balance to you with no further delays. 
If you don't have an account, quickly go ahead and set up an account with any licensed bank capable of receiving large funds. 
Your Full Name:
Your Phone Number:
Your Full Address: 
Once these details are provided, we will contact the paying bank with your details and send you fund deposit certificate from us that your fund have been handed over to them for your payment. I will instruct the paying bank, STANDARD BANK OF SOUTH AFRICA to deduct the Cost of Transfer Fee and the Income Tax from your entitlement funds and transfer the balance to your account immediately.
Sincerely Yours
Mrs Jendayi Elizabeth Frazer
Former US Ambassador
==
Before taking on her position in the Bush Administration, Frazer was Special Assistant to the President and Senior Director for African Affairs on the National Security Council and the first woman to serve as United States Ambassador to South Africa.
Prior to entering government in 2001, Frazer was an Assistant Professor for Public Policy at the Kennedy School of Government at Harvard University from 1995 to 2001. She was Assistant Professor at the Josef Korbel School of International Studies at the University of Denver and editor of the journal Africa Today from 1993 to 1995. She graduated from Stanford University with B.A. in Political Science with honors and African-American Studies with distinction and obtained her M.A. degrees in International Policy Studies and International Development Education, and a Ph.D. in Political Science; during her time at Stanford, former Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice served as a faculty member in the Political Science department.    
 
 
 
The ID, of course, is supposed to seal her 'authentication'.  It would no doubt at cnn.  Not h'yar.  
 
 This is the reply sent back to the ambassadette:
 
I never said that I didn't authorize Mrs. Holly L. McBeath to claim the funds you speak of.  I actually think that they justly belong to her after a concordat between my family and hers extending back generations to 1759.  You should see that your US consulate RCPT server works better than Hellary's did, otherwise the Russians are reading this sh*t right now via Wikileaks.
I read your resume at the bottom of this email and I must say that you sound like a justly dubious person of inarticulate antecedence. 
I have never been to South Africa OR Nigeria OR any other country within the continental African sphere, so it is with much dubiousness that I can be led to believe that I would have a fund amounting to $7 Million USD there.
I like the ID card; you obviously got it at a first rate flea market.
Is there anything else I can do for you besides confirm my existence?
Jack N. Ewehoff
Former US ambassador to Liechtenstein's colony on Mars

 
And I tweaked her alleged resume:
 
Before taking on her position in the Obola Administration, Frazer was Special Assistant to the President and Senior Director for Africans Having Affairs on the National Security Council and the first woman to serve as United States Ambassador to Nigeria where they get et by Nigerians.
Prior to entering government in 2001, Frazer was an Assistant Professor for Pubic Policy at the Kennedy School of Genital Studies at Harvard University from 1995 to 2001. She was Assistant Professor at the Josef Korbel School of Champagne Studies at the University of Denver and editor of the journal African Affairs Yesterday, Today and A Week From Now from 1993 to 1995. She graduated from Wassamatta U with B.S. in Political Science with hors d'eourves and African Studies with distention and obtained her pHd degrees in International Haggis Studies and International Underdevelopment Education, and a pHd in Political Chicanery; during her time at Wassamatta U, former Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice was at a far more prestigious institution doing much more important work.  






That drew a very unambassadorial reply:
 
 
you r stupid person  
 
 
Quite possibly, but apparently not stupid enough for you.  *BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZER*  Ambassadorial FAIL!   No WONDER you're a former ambassadette.
 
 
Meantime, I hope that Holly L. McBeath enjoys those funds our respective family concordats awarded her...

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