Scammer Gets ACKed

Unless the scammer had a clue about the misadventures of Bloom County, he was in no way prepared for this edit.

Not that he was expecting one in the first place.

A number of scammers have posted about their ATM cards that can allegedly hack any ATM in the world, on a post of mine that made fun of one such scammer.

They post their pitch in the 'Comments' section, and I regularly go in and remove them. 

Occasionally I'll edit and respond to their bogus hacked claims.

This time, I let a personal hero of mine -- Bill the Cat -- do the responding, sort of.

Much to my pet rock's disgust.

"Yeah...PHFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT!"

At least it wasn't a hairball that Seymour barfed up.

Here was the hacking scam as presented by the scammer:


Aahil Baadi has left a new comment on your post "A Scammer Ain't A Scammer If He Say So":

NEED A HACKED ATM CARD WITH PIN?
We sell physical loaded ATM cards . It is a crooned card that can be used to withdraw Cash at any ATM Machine. This Cards comes in Visa/MasterCard. Therefore it works at any ATM Machine that accept Visa/MasterCard Worldwide.
CAN I USE THIS READY MADE ATM CARD TO BUY STUFF IN STORES? OR ONLINE SHOPPING? PAY BILLS?
Yes, with this physical ATM card, you can use it to pay stuff at stores through POS. With this ATM card information, you can use it online to pay bills or do online shopping. When you order for this card, Full information about the card will be given to you. We also reload your card when funds exhausted.
DO I NEED TO ORDER NEW CARD EVERY TIME I SPENT THE FUNDS FINISH?
No, if you have already ordered our card, there is no need to keep ordering new cards, Just contact us for a reload. We shall easily reload the ATM card already in your possession
HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE TO RECEIVE ATM CARD IN MY COUNTRY?
If you are in the Africa, you will receive your card in 2-3 DAYS with guaranteed. If you are outside Africa Your card will arrive to you between 3 – 5 business days guaranteed.
HOW SAFE IS THIS CARD?
It is 100% safe to use this card. Because it will be shipped to you as a gift card.
DO YOU ALSO RELOAD ANY OTHER CARD NOT FROM THIS CROONED CARDS?
Yes, we can reload any Active and valid cards, any type of card just contact us for a reload (prepaid cards, credit/debit cards).
HOW DO I ORDER FOR THE ATM CARD?
EMAIL: (dukeblankhacker@outlook.com)...
HOW DO WE MAKE THIS CARD?
We use a machine MSR to crone this cards . You can also buy this machine from us also. You can order for the ATM card either the designed card or the blank card but still same information on them.
EMAIL: (dukeblankhacker@outlook.com).... Thanks   


A jackwagon load of douche canoes, to be sure.  But it didn't go back to the scammer or about 100 of his friends and colleagues looking like that:

On Friday, January 6, 2017 8:11 AM, AhhHell Baadeye <dukeblankhacker@outlook.com> wrote:

NEED A HACKED UP HAIRBALL FROM BILL THE CAT?

 

 We sell physical loaded hacked up hairballs from Bill the Cat.  It is a crooned and hacked up hairball that can be used to gross out your friends and neighbors.  We are not licensed by the government of the Bloom County EPA to sell these hacked up hairballs from Bill the Cat.  This deal comes in a variety of colors, textures and smells.  Therefore it will destroy pretty much anything it makes physical contact with Worldwide.

 

 CAN I USE THIS READY MADE HACKED UP HAIRBALL FROM BILL THE CAT TO BUY STUFF IN STORES? OR ONLINE SHOPPING? PAY BILLS?

Yes, so long as the retailer is an abject moron.

DO I NEED TO ORDER NEW HACKED UP BILL THE CAT HAIRBALLS CARD EVERY TIME I USE ONE?

 

 No, if you have THE one and only HACKED UP HAIRBALL BY BILL THE CAT there is no need to keep ordering new hacked up hairballs.  Unless yours suddenly implodes or sucks the breathable air out of a coliseum or something.

HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE TO RECEIVE A HACKED UP HAIRBALL FROM BILL THE CAT?

 

 If you are in the Africa, you will receive your hacked up hairball in 5-6 DAYS with guaranteed negative results. If you are outside Africa Your card will arrive to you between 1 – 5 business days with even more negative guaranteed results.

HOW SAFE IS THIS CARD?

 

 It is 100% unsafe, unstable, and prone to go radioactive stomach acid nuclear.

DO YOU ALSO REUSE ANY GONE UGLY BAD HACKED HAIRBALLS FROM BILL THE CAT?

 

 Yes, but we recommend that once one has gone bad -- kinda like feeding a mugwai after midnight and it morphs from Gizmo to Stripe -- you seal it in a lead lined, concrete sealed tank and bury it 600 feet underground.  That might keep your entire block from becoming the world's most toxic sink hole...maybe.

HOW DO I ORDER THE HACKED UP HAIRBALL FROM BILL THE CAT?
EMAIL: (dukeblankhacker@outlook.com)...

HOW DO WE GET BILL THE CAT TO HACK UP THESE LETHAL HAIRBALLS?
We use a Heimlich or vigorous back slap.  Sometimes, he loogies one when he farts.  There's no end to how he spits these things up/out.

EMAIL: (dukeblankhacker@outlook.com).... Thanks and don't rat us out to Berkeley Breathed or the EPA/OSHA.

 

The scammer, perhaps upon reflection, decided that my response did NOT constitute a potential 'sale' of one of his hacked ATM cards.

 

Perhaps he didn't reply because he feared the worst.

 

 

Even the pet rock snickered at that one...