Saturday, July 16, 2016

While Seymour Vacations, Kim Jong Un Farts

Kim Jong Un has an addiction to threatening war.

Matters not on whom...he simply must threaten someone monthly or his fung shui is twatwaffled.

It apparently doesn't do to have your fung shui twatwaffled.

My pet rock, Seymour, the usual baiter of Kim Jong Un, is on vacation...so I drew the honor on this occasion of editing another 'threatens the world' story from the dilapidated Pudgemeister:

North Korea Threatens U.S. Mainland With Old Propaganda

Seymour PetRock – WTFNS

North Korea has released a new propaganda video that it made from old propaganda videos rebushed with a ham bone that threatens to destroy the United States with nuclear missiles currently under development between the ears of the pudgy little bombastmeister hisself, Kim Jong Un. The bombastic video makes it clear that, once the KMA-14 ICBM is perfected – aka, once the test shots stop blowing up buildings in Wonsan and fish off the coast – that nothing (nada, zip, zero) will be safe from North Korean atomic rebushed-with-hambone new-old propaganda video reprisals.

The video features numerous failed North Korean missile launches, but highlights the KMA-14 intercountry balls up missile. It's supposed to have a range – once it can get past North Korean territorial waters and the fish that live in fear in them – of up to 87 miles, enough to target cardboard cut out likenesses of Paris, more maybe even New York, placed on target barges that the North Korean military are desperate to hit, so as to avoid being the next exotic execution victim of the mecurial and unstable Kim Jong Un.

A shorter range version of the KMA14, the KMA-01, suffered a string of failures earlier this year. Of the six missiles launched, only one didn't blow up anything in country, with the sixth missile flying several hundred yards beyond the Yalu before crashing into Manchuria or exploding, blowing up some Chinese peasant housing and making Beijing a tad less than happy with their brat dependent.
This new video doesn't actually show a KMA-14 since it's still between the ears of Kim Jong Un and is meant to offset Team America World Police and their artificial intelligence computer.

When western analysts got hold of the video, it turned out to be a cartoon involving Wiley Coyote, Bugs Bunny, explosive filled carrots and a train. A spokesdoof for the official North Korean news service KGAG said that don't worry about the quality of the video, we're working on that.
Western experts calculate that the KMA-14 might reach testably dubious status in the year 2525, if man is still alive.

The video also shows picked photos of Wiley Coyote – seconds before the train hits the explosives filled shack that Bugs Bunny has towed onto a train track – looking like Kim Jong Un if real war ever comes.
 
State Department hash tag hag Marie Barf suggests that “if only Kim Jong Un had a job, he'd stop behaving so badly”, so as to avoid having to address the fiasco of the hellary email server fraud.

While I would be happy to accept a Pulitzer on behalf of my pet rock, I'm not so delusional as Seymour regarding the likelihood of that happening.

If Seymour were here, that comment would have gotten a big fat "PHFFFFFFFFFFFFT!!!"

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3 Comments:

Blogger Sandee said...

I don't know where Seymour is right now, but I know he won't agree with you assessment of his fine editing skills. I'm just saying.

Have a fabulous day Mike. Element says hello. ☺

16 July, 2016 08:29  
Blogger messymimi said...

Heeheehee! Sometimes i wish i could give that petty dictator a few of the spankings his mama missed!

17 July, 2016 05:38  
Blogger Sandee said...

Have a terrific Silly Sunday. ☺

17 July, 2016 08:09  

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