Friday, June 17, 2016

Odds In the Ends

Yes, there's a point to the appearance of Cpl. Klinger from MASH.  And you won't have long to wait for it.

First, feast your eyes upon this effort to give me the business by Naomi Gagnon, who sent an email that was void of text in the body, 'cuz it was all jammed up in the header:

Hello, Greetings to You,Please permit me to introduce myself to you, I'm Miss Naomi Gagnon only daughter of late Dr.fabrice Gagnon,im 21 years old, I am a Victim war and polical Crises which cursed the death of my father My father left a big amount of money with the bank USD 4.5MILLION DOLLARS, and I don't know about this, it was on the 10th of October last year that our family lawyer kindly hand over to me the documents covering the deposit to me Please it is a long story that if I started to narrate all of them to you, you will start shedding tears over there, but I will give you Full details in your next mail as soon as i hear from you but kindly bear in mind that I need you to help me out of this my critical condition and help transfer this money to your account and assist me come over there for security of my life and the fund and start a new life and destiny I am anxiously waiting for your kind response Thanks once again and please extend my greeting to your family. Thanks and God bless you Miss Naomi Gagnon

Okay...now let's get to the point of Cpl. Klinger being in this edit, sorta:

Hello, Greetings to You,Please permit me to introduce myself to you, I'm Miss Naomi Gagnon only daughter of late Dr.fabrice Gagnon,im 21 years old, I am a transhemerroideral gender neutral eunuch of dubious antecedence with no bathroom to call my own, since we usually foul ourselves behind a tree hereabouts.  I've heard all about these safe zones on college campuses in America where delicate flowers are protected from hearing "trigger words" like "self responsibility", "self accountability", "common sense" and such, and I am very much the interested in coming there so I can find out what a bathroom is, and learn what are the "trigger words" that should cause me to empty my bowels while curled in a ball on the floor, whining because my poor widdow feewings was hurt.  
 
I probably need to learn these things because my father abuse sheep and goats when his inflatable girlfriend left him for Otto from Airplane.  
 
It so dramatized him that he left a big amount of money with the bank USD 4.5MILLION DOLLARS, and this make me most ashame of my privilege which is all the rage there on American college campuses...I don't know about this, but it something I need to learn if I am going to get to vote in your election in November 500 times for who the DNC tell me to vote for, in exchange for my very own bathroom and safe zone in their pedophiles section of their basement.  
 
 
Please it is a long story that if I started to narrate all of them to you, you will start laughing yourself to ass off, but I will give you Full heavily redacted details in your next mail as soon as i hear from you but kindly bear in mind that I need you to help me get a gender friendly bathroom of which I am only now learning is so critical to the salvation of western society.  Silly me...I thought those ISIS bastards were more of a threat than a gender neutral bathroom, or needing a safe space from words like "conservative" and "hellary isn't trustworthy" and "peanut butter sandwich"...but I'm a simple Third World dildo brain that can only think for myself when I'm told what it is that is thinkable, like making pedophile-friendly bathrooms.  This is most important according to Debbil Washingmachine Snitz, the DNC chairpoison.  I am anxiously waiting for your kind response Thanks once again and please extend my greeting to the shrieking marmot on YouTube. Thanks and piss up a rope.
Miss Naomi Gagnon
aka Bruce Jenner's pet parrot, Marie Barf
It was obviously too much for Ms Gagnon...learning that her email upset so many people this way.

*snerx*

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1 Comments:

Blogger Sandee said...

Wow, that's some rewrite. It will take weeks for someone to translate this.

Have a fabulous day. I'm awaiting Seymour and Element's arrival. ☺

17 June, 2016 07:06  

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