Friday, March 25, 2016

The Pet Rock Baits Kim Jong Un Again

North Korea's little despot, Kim Jong Un, has his panties in a wad again.

Like they ever get unwadded.

My pet rock, Seymour, noted that the UN -- taking one of their useless unanimous stances -- imposed sanctions on North Korea for it's continued nuclear ambitions.

Which set off the little Pudgemeister.

The story was simply too good an opportunity for Seymour to tweak his favorite 'target to tweak':


North Korea leader orders military to be ready to repel 'Team America World Police' puppets if they attack

WTFNS
By Seymour PetRock 504 hours ago, based on a broken hour glass 

SEOUL (WTFNS) - North Korean leader Kim Jong Un ordered his country to be ready to defend against and repel an attack by the 'provocative puppets' of Team America World Police, in an unusual turn of events, official media said on Friday.

The comments carried by official KCNA news agency marked a further deterioration in what little sanity there might have once been north of the 38th Parallel after the U.N. Security Council reported that Trey Parker and Matt Stone – originators of South Park and the Team America World Police movie – steadfastly refused to consider making a sequel to Team America starring “the pudgy little douche bag” Kim Jong Un.

Kim made the comments as he supervised the exercise of newly developed multiple muppet launchers, which KCNA reported didn't work worth a kimshi equivalent.

Kim said North Korea should "bolster up (its) special muppet farces both in quantity and muppetity" and stressed "the need to get ready to repel the malevolent Western marionettes at any moment," KCNA paraphrased him as saying, since the original transcripts had him slaughtering every word containing an “L”. "Now is the time for us to pervert our mode of ala toward the enemies into an equivalence of defense in every aspect." Kim was obviously referring to when the puppet Lisa poked fun at his father's puppet, Kim Il Sung, in the original movie when he tried to say the word 'inevitable' and couldn't.


  
North Korea has previously threatened pre-emptive attacks on South Korea, Japan, the USA, Texas, Liechtenstein, Andorra, Uranus and Ceti Alpha 5. Military experts doubt it has developed the capability to fire a long-range much of anything with a miniaturized genital of Kim Jong Un attached as far as Wonsan yet.

North Korea on Thursday launched several projectiles that blew up Wonsan, South Korea's defense ministry chuckled, an apparent ill-executed response to the news that Parker and Stone remain adamant about not making a Team America sequel starring the pudgy little douche bag” this week.
The U.N. Security Council passed a rare and typically toothless resolution on Wednesday dramatically doing little to discourage North Korea from acting like fecal doo doo heads following its recent attempts with rockets and a hoverboard that caught fire on Feb. 7.

South Korean President Park Geun-hye on Thursday repeated a stern warning against the North to abandon its Team America Oscar ambitions and said should would work to "end efforts to become one of the Kardashians" by the North's leader.

Further inflaming tensions was the fact that during the Academy Awards substandard performances, not one mention of Kim Jong Un was uttered, causing the pudgy little douche bag to complain about racism in Hollywood, which also had to be paraphrased because Kim can't pronounce “L” worth a damn.
(Editing by Seymour PetRock)

My pet rock has pretty much given up on getting a Pulitzer ("have NOT!!!  PHFFFFT!"), but does imagine that the pudgy little douche bag is eventually reading these posts and perhaps will one day offer Seymour a job as the first pet rock he executes exotically...

"Yeah...uh...WHAT??????  PHFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT!!!!!!"
 

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1 Comments:

Blogger Sandee said...

Bwahahahahahaha. My favorite part is the photograph of West and Kim Jong Un.

Have a fabulous day Seymour. My best to your dad. ☺

25 March, 2016 09:34  

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