Tuesday, December 23, 2014

The Pet Rock vs Kim Jong Un Again

My pet rock, Seymour, apparently loves poking fun at North Korean spoiled brat Kim Jong Un.

In the latest tiff over the Sony hacks over the comedy movie The Interview, Un has his future spokesGainesBurgers spewing all sorts of threats against the US, South Korea, Mars and Alpha Centuri.

Which my pet rock finds funny.

So leave it to Seymour to weigh in with a news edit fitting of a spoiled brat:

Kim Jung Un Wets Himself In Frenzy Over Latest Threats To Make US Pay

OOPS News Soivice – Seymour PetRock

SEOUL, South Korea (OOPS) — North Korean spoiled brat Kim Jung Un is pissed again. So much so, he wet himself during a rant to the official spokesperson for North Korea's talking points Ministry of SOP Rants From Dear Leader.

And then had the spokesperson fed to hungry dogs, creating a new job opportunity akin to that his puppet dadda created with the translator in Team America: World Police.

Such drivel, piddle and tantrums are routine from North Korea's massive propaganda machine during times of high tension with anyone outside of Pyongyang. But a long statement from the powerful-enough-to-poke-through-soggy-toilet-paper National Defense Commission late Sunday also underscores Pyongyang's sensitivity at the fact that Hollyweird made a comedy about assassinating a spoiled brat, instead of making him the focal bad guy in another Parker/Stone Team America sequel. This continues to be a sore point with Kim Jong Un, causing him to get so wound up he feeds relatives to hungry dogs and trantrums to the point of fouling himself.

The U.S. blames North Korea for making hungry dogs sick and having a leader that constantly makes biohazard clean ups necessary in the palace that Kim Jong Il fed Hans Brix to a shark in.

The National Defense Commission, led by Kim, warned that unless the US and its allies cut loose with a large relief order of Depends, “I get very angrier some mores and you not gonna rike it”, making more empty-headed (if not empty panties) threats to use its 1.2 million-member army to take over Toledo.

"Our toughest counteraction will be boldry taken against Mount Rushmore where we know Team America to be ensconced, Horryweird, and Arec Bardwin," said the irritated and fouled Dear Leader to the fill-in spokesperson for the commission's Policy Department.

Horry...er..Hollyweird and Arec Bardwin were not available for comment.

North Korea and the U.S., which fought each other in the 1950-53 Korean War, remain technically in a state of war because Un continues to be pissed (and wet himself) over not as yet getting a starring role in a Parker/Stone Team America sequel. He also wants his own hit single like his father's “I'm So Ronery” that climbed to #1 on the Top #1 hit chart on North Korean Radio, KGAG.

The rivals are locked in an international standoff over the North bombarded South Korean waters and fish, it's SOP human rights abuses, and it's recent use of dogs to eat unsavory family members. 

Seymour is laughing so hard right now, he might just wet himself.

"Will NOT!!!"

Anyone know if there are geologic Depends for giddy pet rocks?


Labels: , , , , , ,


Blogger Sandee said...

Seymour is getting better and better at these. Yes he is.

I don't think there are depends for giddy pet rocks though.

Have a fabulous day. My best to Seymour. ☺

23 December, 2014 09:58  
Anonymous Debbie said...

Kim wet himself, is that why their pitiful internet went out???

Have a Merry Christmas and a very Happy and Healthy New Year

Right Truth

24 December, 2014 13:19  
Blogger Sandee said...

• ★ Merry ★* 。 • ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ •
•。★ Christmas 。* 。
° 。 ° ˛˚˛ * _Π_____*。*˚
˚ ˛ •˛•˚ */______/~\。˚ ˚ ˛
˚ ˛ •˛• ˚| 田田 |門| ˚And a Happy New Year
* Joy to all! ♫•*¨* Peace on Earth ♪♫•*¨*

25 December, 2014 07:10  

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home