Wednesday, September 10, 2014

I Get To Meet Sandra Bullock!

Why the HELL didn't they tell me this before???  THIS would have made ALL the difference!!!

Not really, but it's a really nice thought.

My latest Illumi-nipplehead -- the one from the monkey business post a few days ago -- accepted my character's application for membership.

Even though Myra Manes is dead and 'living' six feet under a well knowd Los Angeles cemetery.

I guess -- like democrap "get out the fraudulent voters" --  they're desperate for memberships.

Here's my "acceptance" letter:

Okay now u have filled the form here are
the benefits of joining.
Once you pay your registration fee,
you   will be initiated and will be
given the sum of 5hundred
thousand   dollars and you will be payed
150thousand dollars every month.
Then you will be granted free
transportation to five good
countries  any time any day ( UK, Canada,
Australia, France,spain).
You will be given protection, power
wealth and long life.
NOTE: all this will be given to you if
only  you pay your registration fee.
the fee will cost you 150 USd  

*TOING*  Dang, there's always that cotton pickin' *TOING* croppin' up h'yar with these fellers.

Naturally, before my chara-orpse starts to play widdem a tad, I sent 'em one more email to see if they'd answer a few questions, not expecting them to read them too closely as you'll note...and what's more, arrange something that any one of my characters, my pet rock...hell, even me...would appreciate for reals:

I have some grave questions for you.

What happens if I want to have my remains remain in the US, rather than UK, Canada, Australia, France or Spain?  Can I do that?
I am happy to receive $500,000 initially; but with that as a base, I don't need $150,000 a month.  I and the groundskeepers would be content with $25,000 a month.  Can that be arranged?
The Illuminati will save further money on me because I have my own personal, very spiritual  protection.
I thought I saw somewhere that as a member of the Illuminati, I can meet famous people.  Can you dig me up the opportunity to meet Sandra Bullock?  I am always been in love with Sandra Bullock.  If you can arrange for me to have meet with her, I will spare no expense from beyond the astral bridge to pay your fee with dispatch.
Last question, can I get something other than an ebola vaccination with membership?  I'm kinda beyond the need for stuff like that.

Please advise soonest.  
My character was all excited, of corpse, awaiting the response from the reading-dysfunctional Illuminipplehead.  He didn't disappoint either with his reading dysfunction or my character's biggest request:
you can leave any were you want
everything you want will be done
no ebola virus
after you join i can arrange you to meet Sandra Bullock personal.   first you must pay 150USd, then i arrange you meet her. character gets to meet SANDRA BULLOCK!!!!
It's about now that my pet rock, Seymour, gives me that "remind me to tell you how many ways and reasons that you're a doofus" look and face palm.  Of course, Seymour's right:  why would Sandra Bullock want to meet Myra Manes, let alone the idjit behind the scambaiting character?
*Sigh* was good for a nanosecond dream.
At any rate, I don't want to disappoint Mr. Illumiknothaid just yet, so Myra lays it on:


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Blogger Sandee said...

u are jackass. bye. Bwahahahahahahahaha. You are also out 150.00 USD.

Have a fabulous day. My best to Seymour. ☺

10 September, 2014 09:53  
Anonymous Debbie said...

I know you are thrilled, ha


10 September, 2014 20:36  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hello everyone,i am Mr. MARK ANDERSON, i'm one
of the asshats sent by the lowly satanic wildebeest

turd (Grand masturbator) to bring as many of those
who are interested in becoming a member of
the great Illuminumbnuts order, i'm a business man, I
own a fly infested internet café in Nigeria and i
also own one of the Biggest collection of slave

employees there. I'm trying to expand into Accra Ghana

and my family now lives in Detroit, MI. I was once like

Idi Amin: fat, overbearing and full of shit. Then i saw an

opportunity to be a member of the satanic illuminumbnuts
hood of muthas and i took my chances and i
have been a member for close to 8 years
now. The higher you get -- and I like meth -- the faster

your teeth fall out. Illuminumbnuts makes your business

atrophy faster than you can ever imagine,illuminumbnuts
brings out all the cancerous butt polyps that merely fingering
your butthole can't reach.

Granted, in my fly infested internet café my slaves are
expected to generate 6,000 US DOLLARS per month

in scam income....or they are fed to army ants.

Needless to say, I always have openings,so if you are interested to be a member contact us now via JOIN


12 October, 2014 06:55  

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