Old Scam Syne
*DISCLAIMER: No Siamese elephants or dwarf trainers were harmed during the upcoming edit*
When you get an email that starts with "DIPLOMATIC RONALD JOHN", you know it's gotta be a scam.
And badly writ, too.
Here's how it started:
I AM DIPLOMATIC MR RONALD.JOHN I have been trying to reach you on your
telephone about an hour now just to inform you about my successful arrival in
George Bush Intercontinental Airport Houston Texas (USA) with your two boxes
of consignment Box worth $12.5million USA dollars which I have been instructed
by UPS DIPLOMATIC COURIER SERVICE to be delivered to you. The Airport authority
demanded for all the legal back up to prove to them that the fund is no way
related with drug nor fraud money,
I have presented the papers I handed to them and they are very much pleased
with the papers I presented but the only thing that is still keeping me here is
the airport delivery Tag which is not placed on the boxes, one of the Airport
Authority has advise that we get the delivery tag so that I can exit the
airport immediately and make my delivery successful .I try to reason with them
and they stated the delivery tag will cost us just $95 Dollars only to get the
two tags placed on the boxes as that tag will enable me get to your house
successfully without any interference,they scanned the boxes and found out that
the fund is 100 % spend able and accepted by any bank in the whole world.
So all my character is tasked with doing is coming up with $95 to liberate Diplomatic Ronald John from the GHW International airport in Houston, TX. Because, his email concludes, "Urgent Response is needed because here is very busy and hot"
This was received on November 18th. Busy, probably...hot? LOL.
So as to not keep the diplomatic waiting, I had my 'editing gone wild' pet rock, Seymour, don his 'edit hat' and have a go:
related with drug nor fraud money.
I have presented the papers I handed to them and after checking my papers
The only thing that is still keeping me here is a group of mangy looking
One of the Airport Authority has advise that we can get out of here only
I can not afford to spend more time here due to my pending audition on
(Here Is Your Package Unlocking CODE(AWB33XZS). That will
Urgent Response is needed because here is very busy and hot
Email me :(firstname.lastname@example.org)
This drew no response from the diplomatic, but one of my long suffering scammers did bother to reply to this thus:
Why not indeed ;-)
He didn't bother to inquire further. And I don't blame him; a mere picture of Lena Dunham is nauseating enough...