A Monsta Scam

Yes, that's John Kerry.

No, he's not directly or indirectly connected to this particular scam. 

His political scams are quite enough, but I digress.

Sooner or later, scammers do come up with a new angle to scam from, though in the end, the scam template is the same.  In this case, they send you a counterfeit money order or cashier's check, you cash it, "keep" a portion of it, and wire the balance back to the scammers.  A few days later -- if you're not a suspicious sort at the outset -- your bank lets you know that the money order/check was fraudulent, and you're on the hook for the entire amount.

An "oh whoops" for you, a "score" for the scammers.

But not here ;-)

I received the following email that had the two elements I look for:  (a) sounds too good to be true and (b) it isn't true:


From: Fidencio Saucedo <f.saucedo112@gmail.com>
To:
Sent: Wednesday, April 10, 2013 5:21 PMSubject: JOB OPENING: Monster Energy Drink® Car Wraps

Would You Wrap Your Car in an Ad for $300 Weekly. Reply if interested.

Best Regards,
Fidencio Saucedo.
Hiring Manager,
Monster Energy Drink®


Before I bothered to respond, I did a little Gooble search on 'Monster Energy Drink Scam'.  And I found it here, among other places.


Still, I played along as interested and responded (as Ben Dover).  I received this lengthy, and telling response from the scammer:


Thank you for your swift response and your willingness to work with
us, Wrap advertising is the marketing practice of completely or
partially covering (wrapping) a vehicle in an advertisement or livery,
thus turning it into a mobile billboard. This can be achieved by
simply painting the vehicle surface, but it is becoming more common
today to use large vinyl sheets as decals. These can be removed with
relative ease, making it much less expensive to change from one
advertisement to another. Vehicles with large, flat surfaces, such as
buses and light-rail carriages, are fairly easy to work with, though
smaller cars with curved surfaces can also be wrapped in this manner.
Wrap advertising is available to anybody irrespective of the vehicle
you drive.


We are currently seeking to employ individual's world wide. How would
you like to make money by simply driving your car or banner wrapped
for Monster Energy Drink®


How it works?
Here's the basic premise of the "paid to drive" concept: Monster
Energy Drink® seeks people -- regular citizens, professional drivers
to go about their normal routine as they usually do, only with a big
advert for "Monster Energy Drink®" plastered on your car. The ads are
typically vinyl decals, also known as "auto wraps,"that almost seem to
be painted on the vehicle, and which will cover any portion of your
car's exterior surface.


What does the company get out of this type of ad strategy?
Lots of exposure and awareness. The auto wraps tend to be colorful,
eye-catching and attract lots of attention. Plus, it's a form of
advertising with a captive audience,meaning people who are stuck in
traffic can't avoid seeing the wrapped car alongside them. This
program will last for 3 months and the minimum you can participate is
a month.


You will be compensated with $300 per week which is essentially a
"rental"payment for letting our company use the space no fee is
required from you. Monster Energy Drink® shall provide experts that
would handle the advert placing on your car. You will receive an up
front payment of $300 inform of check via courier service for
accepting to carry this advert on your car. to this effect you are
advised to check your email regularly to get update as to know when
your upfront payment will arrive along with Graphic Artist address.


1)   You will receive Certified Check.  As soon as you receive the
check, you will cash the check for the decal wrapping on your car,
deduct $300 as your up-front payment. The rest of the funds should be
transfered to the Graphic artist that will wrap the decal on your car.
All you need is to confirm the acceptance and understanding of this
email.


2)  You will make a transfer of funds to the Graphic artist at the
nearest Western Union/Money Gram outlet in your area, the Info which you will
make the transfer to will be emailed to you soon.


3)  We'll like to have some Information about your car.


i) Type of Car and Color :


ii) Model/Year :


iii) Present Condition and the Mileage:


Note:  Please, confirm that you did receive this message so that we
can process funds that would be sent to you for the car advert.


It is very easy and simple no application fees required. Get back with
the following details if you are interested in these offer.


Applicant information:


Full Name:
Full Contact Address:
City,State,Zip code
Phone Number:


All other instructions will be sent out to you ASAP.


I..............Confirm to have received this email and understand the content.


Best Regards,
Fidencio Saucedo
Hiring Manager,
Monster Energy Drink®

Having responded under my guise of "Ben Dover", I went ahead and gave the scammer my actual mailing address; I wanted to see (a) from where the 'check' would come and (b) have the fraudulent document in hand.

Alas, my scammer apparently sniffed me out as a scam baiter....no further communications on his part were sent, and he responded no further to prods from ol' Ben.

So since I couldn't extend the scambait...I took option B...and edited his email.  Which of course, I sent to him and a cornudopia of his peers and colleagues:



Subject: Want Da Business:  We Gibts Youse Da Business: Monsta Camel Pee Drink(Revolting)

Thank you for your swift, eager, and 100% naive response and your willingness to work with
us without verifying one iota of this BS. 

Wrap advertising is the marketing practice of completely or partially covering (wrapping) a vehicle in an advertisement or livery, thus turning it into a mobile billboard.

Our angle is simpler:  send you a fraudulent check, you cash it, keep part, and wire us the rest.  We laugh all the way to our bank, and your bank kicks your ass.

We likes it.  We hopes you will too (at least until it's too late).

We are currently seeking to employ individuals world wide with intellects comparable to door knobs, tree stumps, and especially liberals, who frequently poll dumber than the former two. How would you like to think you're making money by simply driving your car or banner wrapped for Monsta Camel Pee Drink®


How it works?  Simple:  people bottle camel pee, add a spritz of uncola flavor and carbonation, and then we conceal it within counterfeit cans of the popular energy drinks.  Ain't we stinkers?

Now, for the basic premise of the "we're paid by you to scam you" concept:  we send you a faked email from a nationally-knowd energy drink maker, and claim that this energy drink maker seeks people -- we tried hamsters, cows and telephone poles, and none of them would send us money -- to go about their normal routine as they usually do, blissfully ignorant, thinking they're gonna make $300/week for one-three months by using their car as a rolling billboard. 

What does the company get out of this type of ad strategy?  The company we're faking being, heck they  don't get anything but grief from a poopload of low-information voters and idiots stupid enough to buy into this jackwagonload of sh**.    WE get free money.  Yours.

This program will last for 3 months, or until we can find not even the dumbest of morons to fall for it.  At which time, we'll have come up with something else to fool the fools once more.


You will think that you'll be compensated with $300 per week which is essentially a "rental"payment for letting our company use your car; we'll provide *experts* (we kill ourselves with that 'un...) that
will handle your money when you wire it. You will receive a *check* via courier service for
being suck...er...accepting to carry this advert on your car.  At the same time, you will receive the address of our resident *Graphic Artist* who will design the advertising for your car (f**k, we're laughing so hard here we can't breathe...stop it, stop it..). 

Here's how we intend this to work:

1)   You will receive Certified Check.  As soon as you receive the check, you will cash the check,
deduct $300 as your up-front *payment* (our graphic artist is going to need a doctor soon if he doesn't stop laughing hysterically), and then you wire the rest of the funds to the Graphic artist.  All you need is to confirm the acceptance and understanding of this email without question.

2)  Western Union or Money Gram is fine for you to wire money to our *graphic artist* (who is now hyperventilating in the corner, he's laughing so hard).

 

3)  Of course, we have to have some absolutely irrelevant information about your car.
i) Type of Car and Color :
ii) Model/Year :
iii) Present Condition and the Mileage:


Note:  Please, confirm that you did receive this message so that we know we found us a live one.

It is very easy (for us) and no application fees required since we'll get ours with the first *check* and wire transfer. Get back with the following details.

Applicant information:
Full Name:
Full Contact Address:
City,State,Zip code
Phone Number:

All other instructions will be sent out to you ASAP.  Oh, and we'll need to you to sign off on our little Disclaimer thingee:


I.............., being of simple mind and willing remainder, hereby do agree to get screwed by our Third World email scam, and to have our name and email address shared with every other 'fly-on-sh**' scammer within email range of Earth.  Confirm to have received this email and completely misunderstand the content.

No Regards,
Fidencio Saucedo
hR *Manager*,
Monsta Camel Pee Drink®

Much as I would have loved to received one of their counterfeit checks, I couldn't pull it off here.  HOWEVAH...I will try again from another email addy.  If it works...I'll share (the photos, not the faux money).