The Audience Was Amused

Not every scammer has a grasp of the basics of their craft.

Some forget to 'bcc' all the recipients of their email.

I kinda get a kick out of receiving those...I know that a lot of the email addresses I'm seeing probably come from the same place where I planted the one my character uses.

So when editing the email, it just don't seem right if my character doesn't hit 'reply all' and include all those folks in what my character done to the scammer's email, Ma.

Like this one:


Good day and Compliments,
My name is Jane Walker; I am from Heath town in Alabama City of USA. Presently I am in Afghanistan, where am working with the US International Red Cross Organization under United Nations programs. I am Nurse practitioners (NP), a health professional. I am 27yrs of age, single and also a born again Christian and I am also a Kingdom Minded person, It is my desire to serve the military faithfully and be a servant "of whom the world is worthy" according to HEBREWS 11.

Although I am assuring you that you have nothing to be worried about, as far as I am concerned, because I am doing this not by my power neither by my own decision but through a divine direction / instruction from God.

With a desperate need for an mutual business proposal that will benefit both of us, I have been blessed to come about some box contenting $2.5million US Dollars here in Afghanistan and i want to work with you to ship it out of this country and invest it in NGO FOUNDATION and HELPING WIDOWS AND MOTHERLESS CHILDREN AND POOR COUNTRIES with your advice and assistance, I am entrusting this $2.5m US Dollars to you and want you to use the money for the work of God in your Country.

If you are really interested in this transaction truly for the purpose of God's work only, in order to extend His Kingdom, and also for me to be well assured and have solid assurance that the fund that will be given to you, will be used wisely by you for God's work to facilitate what God is doing through your Country. As soon as I hear from you, I will tell you how to go about this project.

Yours sincerely,
Ms. Jane Walker.     


In counting all the email addys not masked, there were over 100 of them...including my character's.  So the edit went back to them all as this:


 Good Golly Miss Molly What's That Condiment You're Wearing?

My name for today is Jane Walker; I have had many such and unrelated names in templates gone by.  But before I digress, I am from Heath town in Alabama City of USA.  I was going to check Google Oith, but it had me somewhere's in the Gulf of Mexico on porpoise.  Not sure where I was going with that one, but back to my poorly-crafted template of dubious intent and antecedence.

Presently I am in Afghanistan, where am working with the Intergalactic Geologic Survey, a substandard offshoot of the Eunuched Nations programs. According to this h'yar, I am a Geology whisperer; I provide therapy and soothement to rocks.  Never thought that rocks got stressed?  Where do you think earthquakes come from?  And try being a lava rock, afraid of heights, and blowd miles in the air after an eruption.  Yes, there is a need for me.  And Afghanistan supplies that need nicely.

Lessee, what else am I supposed to say h'yar:  I am 27yrs of age, single and also a bored-again Buddirafsagarian with Wiccan fingernails.  I am also a Kingdom-minded person, It is my desire to serve faithfully and be a servant "of whom the world is worthy" according to the coffee maker HEBREWS MAXWELL HOUSE 11.

 Although I am assuring you that you have nothing to be worried about, if you're reading this closely you SHOULD be concerned, because you know I've gone completely out of my mind...AND...they're coming to take me away ha-ha, hoho, hehe to the happy home, with bees and flowers and chirping baskets that sit and smile and twiddle their thumbs and toes...*note to proofreader:  what hallucinogen-using whackadoodle is proofing these templates???*

Actually, I am doing this not by my power neither by my own decision but through a divine direction / instruction from someone snorting helium from behind a green curtain in the palace of Oz. 

 With a desperate need for a mutual business proposal that will benefit me while screwing the rest of y'all, I have been blessed to come about some box contenting a rapidly-aging quantity of molding hummus here in Afghanistan and i want to work with someone -- ANYONE -- including you or looks somewhat like you to ship it out of this country and invest it in ARGO FYS FOUNDATION and HELPING WINDOWS AND MUTHALESS CRETINS AND POOR ASTEROIDS with your advice and assistance.  I would have added to that list sh*t house wombats, but I've never met one and am not sure what they could add to this already surreal proposal.

 If you are really interested in this transaction truly for the purpose of a random Coke bottle dropped in a Third World locality, where it becomes some kind of deity that Hollyweird will use as movie fodder, it's here now.  In order to extend this already peculiar Kingdom to Uranus, and also for me to be well assured and have solid assurance that you are of limited mind but willing remainder, I will be happy to know that someone out there on the internet has the intellect of a petrified tree stump.

That could be important down the road, especially if the bridge is out at the end of it.

 As soon as I hear from you, I will know that you didn't read this email.  Hell, I tried and I didn't read this email. 

 Yours in douched pickle juice,
Ms. Jane Walker.    

 

 

It came as no surprise that the scammer didn't respond.

 

A couple of the scam baiters did:

 

F***ing hilarious!  Thanks for the laugh!

 

OMG...that's classic!

 

 

Opinions expressed here are those of individual scam baiters...and are happily endorsed ;-)