Ha
A 'puter problem fixed, just in time for anuddah edit by the ostentatious pet rock, Seymour.
"Am NOT!!!"
Do you even KNOW what ostentatious means?
"Uh...it means I'm from Austin?"
*Sigh*
Seymour did much better with an edit of a rather boring state agency news email. Take a gander:
"Am NOT!!!"
Do you even KNOW what ostentatious means?
"Uh...it means I'm from Austin?"
*Sigh*
Seymour did much better with an edit of a rather boring state agency news email. Take a gander:
You are subscribed to some boring periodical that highlights the academic accomplishments of Tupperware. This will be more fun, albeit strange.
Mischievous Animal(s) Amending Wildlife Zone & Other Signs
12/19/2014 04:03 PM MST
STATEWIDE which is fixable with diet and girdles- House Bill 1-1-1-119911 directed whoever in the state is in charge of such investigations, to start one. It seems that road signs are getting amended along state highways and other places.
And reports have it that a mischievous animal or animals are involved.
Originally, the state established that anywhere animals frequented heavily traveled thoroughfares and unfares, that they be equipped with airbags. This led to the unintended consequence of animals activating their airbags with a distinctive loud flatulence sound, causing stampedes from crowded elevators.
It is suspected that the rare but very “doesn’t play well with others” Western Barking Spider (Arachnis Flatus Whoa Dude) is responsible, but not for the signs issue.
Video surveillance snippets along with sparse eye witless accounts suggest that an organized gang of some kind of hard to find animal(s) are amending signs along road sides, intersections, off of bridges and overpasses and on some landmark buildings. One airplane towed sign was allegedly graffiti-ed shortly after the pilot made a wide turn to the west of Denver. “Ah haid it thar when ah went ta turn aroun’, an’ then th’ dadgummed thang sayed sumpin else than wha’ it sayed afore” reported the pilot to Department of Marijuana Enforcement officials, only to then remind him that he drove a Yugo for Dominos Pizza, before turning him over to a half dozen folks that wanted words with him over where their orders went last weekend.
State wildlife officials were nonplused to learn that the state School of Mines was now The Institoot Of Phffft Smellers, and that signs on I-70 now warn motorists to “Lookout For Mountain – Exit B4 2Late”.
“We think we have a moose out there that’s learned how to attach a Sharpie to its antlers and has a knack for almost legible graffiti” says a source close to a medical marijuana facility in South Park. It is suspected that this moose spends too much time close to pot dispensaries in the Gilpin and Boulder County areas, where wildlife post-high crashes after prolonged exposure and insufficient munchies are prominent.
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Labels: editing for fun and annoyance, making state agency emails entertaining, Seymour the editing pet rock
1 Comments:
The government is always quite boring, but Seymour did a great job spicing up their boring ideas.
Have a fabulous day. My very best to Seymour. :)
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