Here's Your Toll Road
This one's been the rounds before. It musta worked somewhere somehow, 'cuz they have resurrected it yet again on a mass email spamming.
Low informationers in democrap-miscontrolled bastions of FAIL might fall for it; the rest of most of us just hit *spam* followed by *delete*.
But not me ;-) As this one allowed for fun with the template, fun was had therewith:
|EXPRESSLY PH**K EWE Pass|
|Brought to you from an online scammer Disservice Center near some fly-infested internet café where traffic jams are usually ox carts lined up four in a row, stopped at an army ant crossing|
Just so's you knowd...we be most dessertedly pissed on you. Yeah, what that said.
You have not paid for driving on a toll road. You bad. You vewy, vewy bad. Let us forget the factoid that you don't has a toll road near you. Let us forget the factoid that from our fly-infested internet café, we has no ideas what a toll road is. Let us forgets the factoid that we are stupid and pretty inept Third World email scammers. Let us most insteadly focustrate on that we managed to email this to you, and thus in a udopian world of fairness, you needs to make hay fever in paying us for your failure to has a toll road to drive in your neighborherd. Yes, you would rightly guess that we are ACORNs that needed to find some way to scam. Be that ass it is...this invoice is sent repeatedly in hopes you decide not to be vewy, vewy bad...instead we hope that you is vewy, vewy stupid and believe this bullsh*t email instead of ignoring it like intelligent peoples do, 'cuz they pretty much know when they drived on a toll road.
Meantime, if you are vewy vewy stupid, we urges you to please let us lay a blowjob on your bank account and in the shortest possible time.
GET BUTTF**KED H'YAR
(oh heckydarnpoo, the link got stripped..we scammers HATE when that happens; when we finds the sommanabeeyotch what sabatoogied our email scam, we gonna be sooooo pissed off at you!)
|Terms, Definitions, Colonoscopies And Other Weird Sh*t Writed In A Languish We Caint Reads H'yar | Site Map With No Legend, Directions Or GPS Sh*t | Our Complete Lack of Primate Policy On Accounta Cuz We Has Sleeps With One | Our 100% Guaranteed Phishing Policy Totally Meant To PH**K Everyone We Contact Policy l How To Tell Us How To Pound Army Ants Up Our Ass||2014 EXPRESSLY PH**K EWE PASS, a Nigerian 419er scam of dubious antecedence and equally offensive culinary and hygienic habits|
The email address that this allegedly came from was no good, so I had to limit my sharing of it with 50 or so of the scammer's peers and colleagues, along with some friends of mine. A sibling even let me know that she'd received (and trashed) the same email, and thought mine was an improvement.