A Pet Rock Goes Francais

While on a visit, Seymour -- the world travelling pet rock -- got hisself a moustache.

He thought it made him look worldly.

I thought it made him look like a Pringles Potato Chip commercial.

"Did NOT!!!"

Whatever.

At any rate, I got an email scam from  honela durmas  that was all writ in French.  Or, as Seymour insisted, Francais.  And he wanted to be the one to edit the reply.  In Francais. 

Who'm I to deny a worldly-looking pet rock widda Pringles commercial 'stache?

"Is NOT!!!!!!"

So for this edit, I let Seymour lay on his best "sack le blue" dialect to respond to the scammer and about 50 of his friends and peers.

Worry not, readers; it's "merci beau coup" short:


Subject: salut mon cher ami boned chance le fondu ami!

My cheri amour, messy bird coup save ze bone...

my cheri amour, boneless nachos le fock up...

my cheri amour, creepy suzette le mon deu est twatwaffle!

when le moon hits mon eye like a big pizza pie, that's

a food fight...le duck.

 

salut mon correspondance.  Je mensch da twot muy bien mondu boche douche!

Je m'appelle honela dummass j'ai 28 ans weigh le 450 kgs.  Le holy cowmoo!

 

C'est le gary indiana jones!  Je suis là pour corresponde avec vous les miserables en fante bowel le poots, bien?

 

Oui!

 

Je suis masturbate midde cheese grater...sach le shred!  Je vous pris de me répondre a mon
email  honela.durmas@yahoo.fr

 

Fountain blew nom de grrrrr Messy beautwat, mon ami!  Pastry resistant!

Now, I realize I could have used teh gooble translator to decipher the frenchie gobbletalk; but why bother when I have a worldly pet rock with a Pringles 'stache to do it for me?

 

"Is NOT!!!  Le BoneHaid!"

 

I'm betting that last was NOT francais...