A Peculiar Birthday Gift To Me

Timing is everything.

I turned 65 today.  The pet rocks are snickering and referring to me as a "fossil".

Seymour is especially knowledgeable of fossils.

"Oh PHFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT!"

Now to the 'gift' I received:  an email.  From a scammer.  One that was sitting right near his/her/its computer, just waiting for a reply.

I didn't disappoint.

Neither, in the end, did 'they'.  A gift that gave to the very end.

Here's how it went:

How are you doing? Where are you? Are you busy?  

I need a little favor from you?

Thanks,

PAULINE

 The email was from a Pauline Harriot, or so it said.

My response was simple:

I am fine.

I am here.

Yes I'm busy.

What do you consider a 'little' favor?

And with that, I am suddenly chatting with someone new...or just inept:

Glad to hear from you. I really need to get an (google play gift cards) for a friend who is a cancer patient. I promised her an (google play gift cards) as a birthday gift but I cannot do this right now because we travelled for a friend's burial who lost her life to Coronavirus(covid19). I tried purchasing it online but unfortunately all effort to no avail. Wondering if you could get it from any store around you? I'll pay back asap. Kindly let me know if you can handle this.

Thank You.   

Instead of Pauline Harriot, I am now conversing with Brady Mckaig.  Please note the details in his email; it will come back to haunt him shortly.

Are you Pauline or Brady?

How is it that you're unable to get this google play gift card online?   

I love how the responses are almost instantaneous:

Sorry this Brady 

I really appreciate your love and concern. You can purchase Google play gift card from any grocery or drug stores close to you. Total amount needed is $200,in $100 dominations. Send me the pictures showing the claim codes at the back of the cards as soon as you open and scratch the cards.

I will forward it to her asap  Thanks again!

Okay, the ploy is simple enough.  A little more 'information' please:

Before I do this, remind me again who I am doing this for and why.  I have no problem with charitable donations, I just like to have all the facts from who is trying to give me the business.

Thanks.   

The response is within minutes, but 'Brady' kinda steps on his dick:

Thanks, I really appreciate it you are getting the card for my friend who's having COVID-19 today is his birthday 

I am privately in hysterics, while the pet rocks are even snickering at this point:

I see.  Her name is Pauline, correct?

She has COVID 19 or some variant thereof.

And his birthday is today?

It's clear I have a 'live' one here:

Yes    

Alrighty then.  Time fer da fun schtuff:

Fine.  I have a store nearby that has Google cards.

I will be back to you shortly.

Wish Pauline Happy Birthday

 and hope the gender reassignment wasn't

too painful.

The lack of attention to detail always amuses me:

Ok thanks I really appreciate it.  Please when you have the gift cards with you all you need is just scratch the back of the cards to revel the pin and then take a snapshot of the pin and send it to me thanks

I wait a suitable amount of time for me to 'run out' and buy gift cards...and photo 'em:

Alrighty then.  Easy as pie.

This should please your birthday person no end.

I live but to serve.

Of course, these are used Google cards off the 'net:

and...

The reaction from 'Pauline/Brady' was short, heart-felt, and capped off my peculiar and unexpected birthday gift with something of an exclamation point:

 motherf**ker

You're welcome.  I'll let you figure out where you stepped on your dick with this template.

It's been my pleasure.

And it was...