Were Yoda real and around, he'd be sighing and noting that in former "centers of higher learning", now the trend was toward a level of dumbed down stupidity seldom actively sought in the universe.

I'm sure he'd call this pursuit of the dumb side The Farce.

My 'editing gone wild' pet rocks, Seymour and Element, love absurdity, particularly on the collegiate level. And they know that there's no shortage of support for it to be found in the dumbed down regions of today's so-called 'media'.

In this case, the former paper of record, The New York Slimes.

It seems that 'researchers' at UCLA have determined that humans are not the only ones that seek 'privilege' in the world we live in.

Animals do as well. Perhaps they even believe that some form of 'wokedom' can be introduced there too.

This had Seymour and Element so in stitches, I wasn't even sure how they managed to finish this edit .... but they did:

WTF: Scientists Fouling Themselves to Find Privilege, Inequality in Animal Kingdom

'Woke' gone intellectually Broke

Seymour PetRock/Element PetRock • WTFNS

Fedup-Bruary 4, 2022 2:00 am

Eunuchversity professors – overly woke, bored, grotesquely overcompensated and under IQ'd – have been studying privilege and inequality among squirrels and other animals, according to the New York Slimes. Which excited the sh*t out of the Slimes folks and their substandard brethren at cnn...not many others.

It all began as a passing comment during an afternoon coffee and cocaine break among behavioral ecologists at what's left of UCLA: "They saw how cnn was making up health disparities and other inequalities around the world, and the scientists began to wonder if they could further that misinformation about inequality by creating false narratives about it in animals."

The so-called 'xsperts' – 'x' being the unknow'd factor and a spert being a drip of water under high pressure – began searching for examples in the animal kingdom of concepts such as privilege, inequality, gender deprivation and intergalactic germilogical asymptomatic genitalogical disparagy of wealth.

Like anyone working toward a pre-determined conclusion, they 'found' what they sought and/or kept trying until they could make up enough to try and sell it as "settled science".

"When we established the parameters we wanted to build false narratives from and started applying the most peculiar standards imaginable to whatever we wished to conclude, we found lots and lots of examples," Dr. Sennifer Smith&Jones told the Slimes. "To see this across so many different species was really hard to make up without bending a whole lot of basic logic and reasoning, but with enough cocaine and hallucinogens, we achieved results that were quite surprising. And we're just beginning to realize how much in grant money we can milk out of this."

In other words, eunuchversity nincompoops made up a discovery of dubious intellectualcedence and twisted the living sh*t out of it to fit a false narrative that makes 'wokes' the world over wet themselves in perverse ecstasy about. Forget about basic life survival instinct and natural selection; it doesn't find a place in their lack of critical thinking.

Their findings include examples of "species that demand photo ID for many basic functions, but not to register to vote and do so”, among other things. For instance, baby red grouse who aren't abandoned by their fathers "are more likely to be racist in establishing their own territories." Those that are abandoned tend to be reflected in the Angry Birds video game.

Baby squirrels whose mothers hoard food for winter "are much more likely to become right wing extremists that shoot up acorns and commit crimes against bird feeders."

I..simply...can't even.

"Those young, insurrectionist-minded squirrels, the scientists say, are the source of white privilege and the animal version of Trumpism," the Slimes reports.

Those same scientists are eager to expand the versions of COVID to begin impacting rocks, trees, park benches and Yugos by examining thousands of anything imaginable across the animal and other kingdoms. They did wink and nod at their intention to force into their conclusions future studies that prove that gender inequities, "whiteness" and "rape culture," are sinister byproducts of white supremacist humans, and even "voter suppression," among animals in the wild is a learned behavior from white male humans.

Published under: New York Slimes, Science, Made Up White Supremacy, Woke Going Intellectually Broke

Personally, I kinda think that Seymour and Element went a bit nuts with this one. But in the scheme of today's cockeyed world, that's wholly understandable.