Sheepishly Getting Their Goat

Danged things even got coffee named after them.

So why not make ewes of one in an email scam?

You'll see what I just dun there shortly...

Here's the scam that got this off-the-wall edit started:


GOOD DAY

MY NAME IS MRS.MARIANA HUMPHRY KYNASTON,.WIFE OF LATE AMBASSADOR OF JAMAICA TO IVORY COAST,PLEASE I WANT YOU TO REPLY ME BACK AS SOON AS YOU READ THIS MESSAGE BECAUSE I WANT TO DISCUSS SOMETHING VERY IMPORTANT WITH YOU,I AM A CANCER PATIENT WITH A VERY SHORT TIME TO LIVE AND I AM CONTACTING YOU BECAUSE I WANT TO ENTRUST THE SUM OF (USD$12.7MILLION)TO YOUR HAND AS A DONATION FOR CHARITY WORK., TO HELP THE ORPHANAGES, WIDOWS, AND MOTHERLESS CHILDREN AROUND YOU, THIS MONEY WAS DEPOSITED BY MY LATE HUSBAND IN ONE OF THE SECURTIY COMPANIY HERE IN ABIDJAN AND OUR PLAN WAS TO USE IT FOR INTERNATIONAL INVESTMENT BEFORE DEATH TAKE HIM AWAY FROM ME ,,I AM WAITING YOUR URGENT REPLY FOR MORE INSTRUCTION AND INFORMATION ABOUT THIS FUND,

REGARDS
MRS.MARIANA HUMPHRY KYNASTON  


Awwwwww...the old "I'm dying, help me give my money to charity" scam.

Uh huh.

Well, that ain't the way it went back to ol' Mariana and a host of her peers and colleagues:


GOOD DAY

MY NAME IS MRS.MARIANA HUMPHRY KYNASTON, A WOMAN AT BIRTH BUT MISLED BY A WORLD OF HORNY MEN SO NOW I AM LIBERATED BECAUSE I NOW IDENTIFY AS A EWE AND HAVE TAKEN A VOW OF CHASTITY AND LIVE IN A CONVENT FOR EWES ON THE LAMB.

PLEASE I WANT YOU TO REPLY ME BACK AS SOON AS YOU READ THIS MESSAGE BECAUSE I WANT TO DISCUSS SOMETHING VERY IMPORTANT WITH YOU....A THREE PECKERED GOAT GOT LOOSE IN OUR CONVENT AND UNFORTUNATELY I WAS ONE THAT THE CROSS EYED BASTARD RAM-A-LAMB-A-DINGDONGED. 

I AM CONTACTING YOU BECAUSE I WANT TO ENTRUST MY ORDER FOR ACME CORPORATION'S "BORN AGAIN VIRGIN EWE KIT" WHICH I REALLY NEED TO RECLAIM MY PLACE IN THE CONVENT, SINCE THE BITC...ER...MUTHA SUPERIOR BAAAH BLEATS THAT I AM NOT ONE WITH THEM AFTER GETTING RAM-A-LAMB-A-DINGDONGED BY A THREE  PECKERED GOAT IN FULL BLOWD HORN GOAT MODE.  I HAVE IT ON RELIABULL INFORMATIONS THAT THE QUALITY AND EFFECTIVENESS OF ACME CORPORATION PRODUCTS IS ENDORSED BY WILEY COYOTE, A FAMOUS ACTOR FROM MY CHILDHOOD, SO I KNOW THIS IS WHAT I NEED TO BE ABLE TO BLEAT THE GREGOATIAN CHANTS WITH PURE CONSTITUTED VIRGINITY.  

I AM WAITING YOUR URGENT REPLY FOR TO TELL YOU HOW TO PLACE THE ORDER FOR THE KIT FOR ME AND GET IT TO ME SO I DO NOT LIVE ON HAVING BEEN RAM-A-LAMB-A-DINGDONGED.

BAAAAH,
MRS.MARIANA HUMPHRY KYNASTON

aka SISTER BAAAH HUMBUG OF THE ST. METH 'N HALLUCINAGENS CONVENT FOR ANY OF EWE THAT THINKS YOU IS ONE

VADUZ, LIECHTENSTEIN  

 

The scammer didn't seem to know what to do with this; my character got back a 'no  text' reply.  One of the scammer's peers and colleagues did beg my character to desist sending them edited emails thus:

 

 

STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  

 

 

My character's answer back was just what the scammer wanted to hear...not:

 

 

NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  

 

 

Ram a lamb a ding dong  ;-)