Saturday, April 23, 2016

That One Left A Mark

I do believe that I hurt someone's sensitive feewings.

Got a nonsense email from a nonsense scammer and being in a nonsensical mood, I edited it nonsensically.

Here's what the scammer got back:

From:
 western.u2@pisem.net
 To: jacknewehoff101@hotmail.com
 Subject: Re: RE: Contact Dr.Eric Antho­ny to release of
 your Mt­cn
 Date: Fri, 18 Mar 2016 11:34:39 +0300

 Attn: Benef**ktorary,

 Your chain mail received and noted regarding your platypus
 overbite was well acknowledged on my deck this morning and
 after our official verification perusal, we have all taken a
 shit upon it.  We thank you for sending us the paper
 upon which to shit.  Usually, we do it on the floor,
 and drag our asses around thereon like dogs, picking up
 slivers and army ants and other assorted ass irritants that
 are rife hereabouts.  The Ministry of Finance of
 the federal republic of Benin thanks you too, because it
 would have been their floor we sh*t on, without your email.

 Please you are advised to go through this email carefully
 and make sure you understand and comply with the contents
 before replying. We are instructing you to send us 100 rolls
 of Northern toilet paper, to be used by federal
 government of Benin so that we can finally clean up the
 floor of this building and hopefully get the fly population
 herein under one billion per square inch.   So,
 you will be receiving shipping instructions on how to send
 us 100 rolls of Northern toilet paper.

 1. Receiver name:...CHUKWUKA SIMEON OKOYE
 2. Country:... Benin Republic
 3. City:.......Cotonou
 4. Test question:. What for toilet paper?
 5. Test answer:....To wipe our fouled asses widdit.
 6. Amount:.....100 rolls

 This is the only official requirements needed and you are
 given a mandate to get this concluded, otherwise we will
 have to riot and loot a few dozen 7-11s in democrap
 controlled towns so that our demands are met.

 Kindly get this done so we are not forced to riot.
 While we live to riot, sometimes we wind up being second to
 the store and are left with ripped and torn bags of Cheese
 Nips, instead of the coveted toilet paper.

 This message is meant for you alone. Disclosure of it to any
 third party may lead to us being really pissed off at
 you.

 Please call us at +229-98663188 for any more detailed
 instructions you may need so as to not piss us off and leave
 us having to wipe our asses on the floor of this building in
 Benin, which is now unfit to live in anywhere BUT a Third
 World country. Also send Pine-sol by the gallon to help us
 void the stench around here. 

  Mr. Eric Anthony
  

Sometimes you get to see what other scams the scammers are engaging in when they don't read and respond to you.  This time, the scammer did read what I dun to their email, Ma, and they didn't bother to switch emails to respond from.

I must say, I love this response...best of 2016 so far:

BASTARD YOUR MOTHER FORKER BASTARD YOUR MOTHER FORKER BASTARD YOUR MOTHER FORKER BASTARD YOUR MOTHER FORKER BASTARD YOUR MOTHER FORKER BASTARD YOUR MOTHER FORKER BASTARD YOUR MOTHER FORKER BASTARD YOUR MOTHER FORKER BASTARD YOUR MOTHER FORKER BASTARD YOUR MOTHER FORKER BASTARD YOUR MOTHER FORKER BASTARD YOUR MOTHER FORKER BASTARD YOUR MOTHER FORKER BASTARD YOUR MOTHER FORKER BASTARD YOUR MOTHER FORKER BASTARD YOUR MOTHER FORKER BASTARD YOUR MOTHER FORKER BASTARD YOUR MOTHER FORKER BASTARD YOUR MOTHER FORKER BASTARD YOUR MOTHER FORKER BASTARD YOUR MOTHER FORKER BASTARD YOUR MOTHER FORKER -  

and it came from  mss.evlyne_loba@yahoo.com, rather than from either Sarah Davis (original email) or Dr. Eric Anthony (whom I responded to).

That one left mark enough to throw them off their game.

I'm sure my reply didn't help:

"BASTARD YOUR MOTHER FORKER..."  BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA  You funny, funny scammer.  Not convincing, but you funny, funny scammer.  After you get time out for potty mouf we might let you revisit Sesame Street.  There's a good four year old now.

That drew the exact same reply as above.  LOL.

Now I know that you work from templates and that I took you out of your template, so your template tantrum is understandable.  But really...go see the movie Johnny Dangerously and then re-try your template tantrum.  It might not help you now, but it'll sure entertain the sh*t out of whom ever else reads it.  

The scammer(s) apparently were not seeking advice for improving their template tantrums....nothing more from BYMF...LOL.


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1 Comments:

Blogger Sandee said...

Bwahahahahahahaha. How colorful that response. They are so troll like aren't they.

Have a fabulous day Mike. My best to Seymour. ☺

23 April, 2016 10:40  

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