Sunday, January 31, 2016

Scam Coyotes vs My Roadrunner

Sometimes, some of my characters feel a good deal like the Road Runner.

Which is fine; because Acme is still supplying the scam Wiley Coyotes.  And we all remember how that repeatedly turned out.

Like for instance on this one:

My Name is Mrs Jessica Peterside from United Kingdom who is suffering from cancer of the lungs and I wish to use my fund to serve the poor in your country since I have limited time on earth contact me( ) Regards Mrs Jessica Peterside  
A scam Wiley Coyote has the Road Runner in his/her/its sights.  Or so they believe.
Then, my character edits the above scam email and sends it back to the scammer, 50 plus of their colleagues, and an assortment of my random readers, looking a tad like this:
On a day in the life of a Third World twatwaffle, ''Mrs Jessica Peterside'' < a="">> doesn't know that she wrote:<>
My Name is Mrs Jessica Peterside from Nigeria who is suffering from having a peter on her side and I wish to ask you to help me have surgery to have the peter removed or at least relocated to where it can better suit my needs.  I need you because I have limited time on earth with a peter on my side; I am telled that extraterrestrials find side peters intriguing and kidnap them on a regular basis, whisking them away to their home planets to appear on alien talk shows like Ellentoid,  The Viewtoid and a solar systemal favorite, Uranus Idol.

Therefore, it imperative in my estimation that you contact me ( ) before aliens from wherever take me to compete on Uranus Idol, because I have no talents to entertain the very tough judges on that show, save for being able to fart Slim Whitman tunes in a key that exploded Martian heads in Mars Attacks!, which wasn't really a silly movie...that really happened and but for me, you'd all be subjugated by aliens that look like they have prostates for heads and hellary's ass in an oversized thong for faces.

Thank me later; I need you to save me now.
Regards Mrs Jessica Peterside  
And another scam by Nigeria's version of Acme goes phffffffft:
You'd think that they'd find a better scam maker than their version of Acme.  But nawp...


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Blogger Sandee said...

Well you altered this beyond belief. I love it.

Have a fabulous day. My best to Seymour. ☺

31 January, 2016 10:42  

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