And Kenny Didn't Even Have To Die

I'm pretty sure that most of the scammers I interact with, end up not liking me.

Call it 'instinctive intuition' on my part if you will.  I just know that they don't like me.

Not that I necessarily blame them:  some of them may have put a lot of time, effort and thought into their scam efforts, only to have me minimize and ridicule that hard work and effort.

Not all of them take the time to let me know that they don't like me.  But some do.  Take for example, Mr. Milton Daniel.  He doesn't like me.  He let me know it.  And here's why, starting with his hard-designed scam email:


THE RELEASE OF YOUR FIRST INSTALMENT PAYMENT £10,00000 USD
Western Union Payment Centre has received your application for the release of your daily payment. Be advised that it has been designated that the sum of £10,00000 USD be paid to you daily using Western Union Money Transfer service as approved by the U.N and the IMF till we send you a total of £50,000.00


*** You will be paid £50,000.00 daily till you receive your full amount in total of £50,000,00 ***


As a matter of urgency, in order not to waste more of your time before you start receiving your funds, Please be informed that a Clearance Certificate and your activation fee's for your first transaction must be paid before the Western Union Payment Centre initiates your transaction. And to this effect, our head of transfer department instructed us to stop the first transfer of the first £10,00000 USD, to avoid problems with the international monetary fund ''IMF''. But not to worry much, you will start receiving your daily instalment of £10,00000 after we confirm your payment of £170.00 for your activation fee, and after that your first instalment will be released to you.

The activation of your transaction will be handled by the approved Western Union official below; Approved Western Union Official: Milton Daniel
Email: milton.daniel6010@yahoo.co.uk


Now as I noted above, Milton Daniel may well have worked hard on his email scam.  Be that as it may, his hard work, if it was that, sucked.  Bad.  So I, being the sort that I am, undertook to help it out a bit.  Here's how: 


From: FLATUS INTERRUPTUS
To:
Sent: Tuesday, August 14, 2012 10:25 AM
Subject: Contact Dr. Milton Daniel

Please be informed that I have revolutionized sex change surgery forever! After years of experimentation on jungle monkeys, I have perfected the marriage of the penis and vagina into a single organ that can f**k itself! YES! I call it the Pevina! It eliminates the need for dating...courtship...marriage...just to get laid. Now you can lay yourself, and wherever you are! All the sexual conveniences right there in your shorts!

F**k yourself and forget it made easy. No more 'wham, bam, thank you Ma'am'...you can do yourself and not worry about having to call yourself tomorrow.

If you want to know more about my splendid sexual surgical revolution -- and it only costs you one time £50,000.00 Fifty Thousand British pound -- please to direct your questions and requests to Dr. Milton Daniel
Telephone:+447035930235

Contact Email: danielmilton935@yahoo.com.hk


Now that was so much better, wasn't it?  I thought so.

Mr/Dr. Milton Daniel apparently did not.  And I didn't need the gift of a psychic to know it.  For a few hours after I dispatched this wonderful edit to him and a couple dozen of his peers, he responded thus:


BASTARD
Sent from my Nokia phone


He doesn't like me.  And I didn't even have to kill Kenny to rate that.