Is-Ain't

It's all Bill Clinton's fault, y'know.

In the mid 1990s, Slick Willie asserted that oral sex wasn't really 'sex', and that it all depends on what your definition of 'is' is.

The aftershocks didn't reverberate merely around intern apartments in DC and Merriam-Webster; they had cosmic repercussions.

In 2006, Pluto -- our 9th solar systemly planet -- was suddenly demoted by *some* astronomers, as not being a 'real' planet, for some silly classificational reasons. When discovered in 1930, Pluto -- named for an animated Disney pet -- was deemed worthy of inclusion into our solar systemly family.

Then came the same kinda thinking that turned 'is' into 'is-ain't', and *BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZER*, we boot out the 9th planet named for a cute animated dog. All the while, keeping the 7th one named for a below the belt orifice.

Well, move over, 'is', 'oral sex', and Pluto: you have company.

North Dakota.

In brief, the poor silly void between NE Montana and NW Minnesota, achieved a degree of respectability with statehood in 1889. And retained it, despite all the geographical and meteorological jokes, until some nosy North Dakota history buff found his version of redefining 'is': the omission of one word in the North Dakota state constitution -- "executive" -- put it at odds with the US Constitution. And thus, this historian asserts, North Dakota really ain't a state.
One faction within the void is preparing for the worst case scenario, and prepping border signs to read "Welcome To No Dakota..Kidding Y'all Since 1889".

The state legislature is preparing to address the issue with the voters, tentatively in November, 2012, to decide whether to fix the one-word omission or not.

'Is', 'oral sex', and Pluto, never got that chance.

So we have to wait until November, 2012, to find out if it's Minot, or Mightnot.

But don't worry about replacing your flags just yet: Califorlornia is thinking of splitting into two states. That star for the possibly former North Dakota-turned-Not Really Dakota, may have a need yet.

Depending on what their definition of 'state' is.