Anatomy of a Piss-off III

With my seemingly contrite 'cave-in', I receive this message from Kelley Ko on Saturday, June 16:

"Uranus: I will be waiting for the wiring information of the company's balance as I instructed. This delay has terribly affected our operations, do you understand this? We are in dire need of those funds. I am trusting you that you will not fail me this time".

So I made up two Western Union receipts, complete with made-up MTCNs (Money Transfer Control Number), and emailed these to Kelley on Saturday evening. I even went so far as to note for him as you note, I did not keep my 10% fee, feeling guilty about how I treated you in this deal, so I sent the whole amount, less the WU fees. If confession is a tonic for the soul, I hope mine will be salved with this act.

Now, for those of you who are familiar with South Park, specifically Season 7, there is an episode wherein the entire show is taken up by Cartman's left hand seemingly possessed by a hand-puppet version of J-Lo, to the point that Ben Affleck dumps the real J-Lo to romance the hand-puppet version, with Cartman attached. Right up to the end, Kyle, Stan and Kenny aren't buying it, thinking it just an act on Cartman's part. One he vehemently denies.

Until Kyle finally concedes that maybe it was true. Which is what Cartman was waiting for all along.

Well, Kelley's reaction to taking the WU information I gave him, and taking it to his WU office on Monday, June 18, comes through like flying turds into a high-powered fan:

Email Title: WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU??

"URANUS, I DON'T KNOW WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU AT ALL! I ALMOST GOT ARRESTED AT THE WESTERN UNION BECAUSE OF YOU!! THE MONEY TRANSFER INFORMATON YOU GAVE ME DOES NOT EXIST!! I WAS EMBARRASSED AND HUMILIATED, AND THEY ALMOST CALLED CONSTABLES ON ME!!

I AM OUTRAGED OVER THIS!! DO YOU THINK WE PLAY GAMES IN THIS COMPANY? YOU WILL PAY FOR THIS!!!

And just like the aforementioned Eric Cartman in that aforementioned episode, it was time to close this series with a Cartmanesque reply:

Kelley:

You might have a point, Kelley, but to more immediate issues...have you ever seen South Park? Are you familiar with the character Eric Cartman, if you have? If yes, then you'll understand fully what's going to follow; if not, here is what Eric would tell you:

I lied.

He would then follow up with something like:

Neener F***ing Neener,

I just F***ing fooled you,

Neener F***ing Neener,

You're a F***ing Mugu!

MWHAHAHAHAHA!

Thanks for letting me drag this out an extra round. I was busting your balls, just busting your balls, Kelley. As for your point on how I will pay for this .... MWAHAHAHA! I will pay by hanging a trophy on my wall...your money order! And I will pay by publishing our email exchanges for all the Internet world to read! And all I had to do was play easy to your lead-in!

*BUZZER* LOSER! LOSER! LOSER! You have a right fine day, Kelley.

And that's how you find the commonality between Hillary Clinton, Kelly's Heroes, South Park and an email scammer, at least here in the world of Skunkfeathers.