The Camel Mile
Oh, it started out simply enough: another 'banker' from Burkina Faso, having found untapped millions in his branch of the Bank of Africa, wanted my "confidential and secret" help to exploit.
At my expense, of course.
Well, with a name like "Abu Salam", I dipped into the "off-the-wall" corner of my editing files, and came up with something that the good doctor will never forget...if he was ever able to understand it in the first place:
I know that this message will come to you as a surprise; and you think to yourself, "wait, it's not my birthday or anything like that!". Well, Ferretlips, it ain't that kind of surprise.
I am Dr.Abu Salam. I go by Abu. My friends call me 'Gesundheit'. They are such smart asses.
I run a camel rebushing business here in Burkina Faso, the capital city of Ouagadougou, which next to nobody can pronounce without spitting.
I hoped that you will not expose yourself to my camels. They are so impressionable. I need your urgent assistance in shipping to me 10,000 rebushed camel assholes. I have many contracts to refush camels across the Middle East, and those perverts that use camels instead of women, well....they just wear out camels at an astonishing rate. My business is almost overwhelming.