Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Post Yukdum

Yes, there is a reason for the picture of one of the ugliest dawgs on the planet h'yar.  Won't take you long to understand why, either.

Now that I'm recovering from having caught the creeping crud for 2013, I noted my email scammers had apparently missed my editing acumen:  I had more than 20 of them lined up in one account, and 12 more in another, awaiting my wisdom.

Uh-huh.

The one that 'won' my editing acumen early on was Dr. Raymond Chi'en Kuo Fung, claiming to be with Heng Seng Bank in Hong Kong.

After reading what I dun to his email, I think he's regretting having 'won'.

Now, perhaps some of the 'illness delirium' that comes with the creeping crud, managed to find its way into my edit.  I'll let you readers decide that:


From: HANG SENG FUKDUMGOOD BANK <info@yahoo.com.hk>
To:
Sent: Tuesday, January 15, 2013 8:02 AM
Subject: HAPPY PLEASE READ !
Dear Friend.


I am sure you will be apprehensive/Skeptical about my Email due to the Level of Scams going on in the Internet in recent times.  But after you read my email, I sure you satisfied, yes?  My Name is Dr Raymond CH'IEN Kuo Fung Fukdumgood, I am the executive Chairman Of Hang Seng Fukdumgood Bank Of Hung-Dung-Ding-Dong, and I are off to see the Wizard, the meth-ity Wizard of Ozth, the wizziest wizard of Ozth if ever a wizz there wuz.
 
 
You forrow me so far?
 

There is the sum of $550,000.000.000.00 in my bank.  On paper, that is.  In actuality -- I am telled that this is word -- we have that amount in West African francs, which are worth....not much of anything, after you rinse them off from having been used as substitute toilet paper in some places.  That is why I am asking that you be my partner and we work together as partners so as to have the sum transferred out of my bank into the blind trust account of an animated cartoon chicken that repeats hisself in a southern American dialect.   


Foghound Leghump is, I think, his name.  I think, you see.
 
 
Please endeavor to observe utmost discretion in all matters concerning this issue because there are many of the unscrupulous types in our world, and so too many of thems winds up on the internet with email accounts.  And as we can surmise this to be sure, some will send emails out with stuffed like this writed all over their emails, yes?  But of course, my email is 100% inauthentic, on this you are counted!  So...once the funds is get transported, we shall then share in the ratio of 600% for me, 4% for you. My Personal Email Address Is: drraymondchienkuofung111@gmail.com
 
 
I think you will not to quizzle with my meth skills, yes?  Please if you are interested to be my partner in this project I need you to reply me back.  Now I knowz what you're thinking and yes, if you simply emails me "Me Back", I will laugh -- it is to laugh -- but then we must get down to get seriousness in this business, you seas.  I cannot contact you with my official email-address because it is been monitored by my wife's Mandurin Sumo poodle, Wun Dum Fuk, and he bites things when he's not peeing all over himself.


Also you are to Fill the information below.


1, Your Full names:.............................
2, Your ages, howsomanyevers you gots:..........................
3, Your primate phone number:...............
3a, Why you give your primate a phone number (we mean, what the fuck-san):.................
4, Your current country and residential address:........
5, Your Degree of Occidental:.................................
6, Your Level Of Investment In Rehabilitating Violated Crustaceans:...........................
7, Can You Handle A Panda Pumpkin Enema:...............................


So that the attorney can start putting together the necessary paperwork that is meaned to look authentic and we can only hope that it will, we need to you to put speed ahead of Valium.  Meth users would understand that, I think.  If interested  please  reply via my Private Email: drraymondchienkuofung111@gmail.com


Your earliest response to this letter that includes showing that you read it with full contents well noted, will be appreciated.
Kind Regards,
Raymond CH'IEN Kuo Fung Fukdumgood
 
 
The 150 or so scammers who received a copy of this edit didn't seem to care about it, one way or the other; Dr. Raymond Ch'ien Kuo Fung Fukdumgood, was a bit nonplussed:
 
this not what i send you.  are you serious or not to proceed?
 
Oh, I am mostest seriousness about this, but we must proceeds on the very nature of the email you sended me and I had reverse speaks with, okay-san?
 
From the silence since that reply went back to Dr. Raymond Ch'ien Kuo Fung Fukdumgood, I reckon it means we won't be having any more reverse "speaks".
 
And how's YOUR 2013?
 
 



 

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3 Comments:

Blogger SueAnn Lommler said...

I see yours is starting off in full swing!! Ha
As I was reading this, a senator...about 200 years old came one the news? Do they preserve these guys in pickling brine?
Sheesh...he could hardly form words!
His tongue is so old...petrified!!
Hugs
SueAnn

23 January, 2013 03:38  
Blogger Sandee said...

Meth skills? Bwahahahahahahaha. I've seen a lot of folks on meth and skills isn't a word that ever came to mind. Just saying.

Have a terrific day. Seymour sends is regards. :)

23 January, 2013 09:12  
Blogger Right Truth said...

$550,000.000.000.00 "on paper". Sounds like the government's accounting, ha.

As to the picture of the dog, I bet he/she has a good personality.

Debbie
Right Truth
http://www.righttruth.typepad.com

24 January, 2013 09:14  

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