Randomality in Da New Yahr

Having left behind 2010, the sign covers that, too.

Okay, it's time for some more randomness as I allow my thought processes to go into free "fuhgeddaboudit":

1. There's nothing wrong with unemployment, that re-employment won't fix eventually.

1a. Except taxation, dammit.

2. Go Green Bay!

3. I like the original Law & Order (TOS).

3a. Which is good, 'cuz I can't get it from politicians.

4. No matter where you go, you'll probably smell it.

5. I made spagetti.

5a. It cost me one of the few remaining pans I had.

6. I walked around the local mall for an hour with a beautiful woman; staying in her 'six', she never realized it.

6a. And I don't have the bruises, to prove it.

7. After a trip to Washington, DC, my pet rock, Seymour, is pondering a run for the presidency.

7a. There will be no platform demanding reparations for Seymour's geologic relations, used as cat box filler.

8. Bradley Manning -- the US Military insider benefactor of Wikileaks -- is a traitorous sh**.

9. Anyone willing to bet that Brett Favre will stay retired for his 3rd and final time?

9a. Didn't think so...

10. Intelligence reports suggest that the Chinese are gearing up for war.

10a. I won't buy any more of their pupu platters, if it's with us.

11. Having a collosal conglomerated mass of solidified mucus, sucks. Glad I don't.

12. Is there really anyone that thinks Michael Moore is operating on more than two brain cells?

13. I am not putting porcupine sushi on my 'bucket list'.

14. I heard the radio commercial of the pigeons playing ragtime piano with their beaks. They sounded good.

14a. Too good, actually; I'm sure it was a cat chasing a mouse across the keys...

15. I'm sure that a mime as a radio traffic reporter is unheard of.

16. Season 10 of American Idol is about 9 seasons past enough.

17. One episode of anything featuring Eliot Spitzer is 60 minutes past enough.

18. I'm still cancelling my cable after football season's over.

18a. Especially since the History Channel sold out history to endless episodes of Ice Truckers.

19. Former speaker Bela Pelosi must have been grounded; I found her broom.

19a. And hid it.

20. Kudos to Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords on her amazing progress toward recovery.

20a. 10 billions tons of compost to The Daily Kos and Paul Krugman, for grotesquely lying about the rest of the story.

21. I found a psychic eggroll. It showed up already eaten.

22. I learned how to drive a stick: put wheels on it.

23. I also learned how to keep bees from driving you buggy: lock u buggy and hide the keys.

23a. I was smart enough to duck the boos and throwd joke books after that one...

24. If I'm right-handed and left-footed, does that make me libertarian?

25. A friend told me that they're experiencing bitter cold in Iowa; I didn't know my ex-fiancee had moved there.

26. Years ago, I spent hours trying to find the 'z' in xylophone.

26a. I can't believe I just admitted that....

27. Old habits are hard to break; just ask a nun.

I return you now to your own individualized randomality. This concludes this *FAIL* of mine.