I know a scammer that kind of understands how Taylor Swift felt.
Kinda sorta.
This scam email rewrite will be mercifully short, friends.
Just like the email that triggered it.
Good day. I am Mrs Meili Chi Fu. I have a secured business proposal for you. Email me on (the aforementioned address).
The word must be out about what's happening to emails sent to this particular address of mine.
Nyuk.
So I forwarded it to the other address from whenst I'm replying these days, revised it with brevity and conciseity, and sent it back to the Mrs, and 25 selected friends and colleagues of hers. It went like this:
I am Mrs. Meili Chi F*** and I have a revived vagina proposal for you. Last year I was diagnosed with terminal crotch crickets that had eaten away most of my vagina. I blame those filthy Somali pirates who held me for ransom in '09, and I wound up freeing myself by having sex with the entire lot of them. Arrrrrr. Fortunately for me, Dr. Suk Wun Dong, a noted vaginal transplant specialist, was able to transplant the vagina of a virgin goat into me, and saved me.
Now that I'm a born-again virgin -- literally -- I need clients to defrock me. I understand that some of you boyz out there, receiving this email, love to f*** goats. Well, I'm better than any goat you'll ever backdoor, and I gotz what youz wantz, so let's goat for it.
Told ya it was short. So was the somewhat unexpected reply from Mrs. Fu, though the content of the reply seems to becoming an almost talking point response in scamdom:
F*** YOU ASSHOLE!!!!!
You know me....can't ignore thanks for a job well done:
*BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZER*....the plumbing's all wrong for you to do that, Meili. But hey...I'm sure one of your 25 peers and colleagues will be happy to defrock your virgin goat vagina. I'll send out a reminder email to them daily, for the next week, so's they don't get busy and fergit, okay? No need to thank me...it's what I do.
After a week of sending those reminders -- including copying her, of course -- I didn't hear back, so don't know if she appreciated my thoughtfulness or not.
Prolly not...
Labels: beyond stupid email scammers, born again goat vagina, Mrs. Meili Chi Fu, rewritten email scam
3 Comments:
A spammer of few words, a rarity.
Debbie
Right Truth
http://www.righttruth.typepad.com
Goat for it - haaaaaaaaaaaaa! I've just forwarded my brilliant news of my win on the Yahoo lotto - maybe you can be so kind as to do the paperwork for me to claim it? (I'll split the profits for your trouble..) x
@Shrinky: ha. Why not ;-)
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