Walker: Nigerian Scamstress? Part II

Of no great surprise, Mrs. Mary Walker "well noting" my reply (but not understanding a word of it), responded affirmatively, even eagerly, thus setting the stage for the furtherance of her efforts to give me the business.

Uh huh.

Here is her reply to my initial response (as full of typos as the previous):

Dear Dr. U. R. Phulovit
Thanks for your message the content well noted. Yes, it upset us much my relation no help us though i think he was good positioned to help. after much delibration with my husban we decided to partner with you an i hope you will not betrad the trust because this is money business we need to trust each other i will love both of us to undergo mutual trust agreement so that we understand ourself (I'm all for understanding myself one day, let alone finding a woman who can, but I digress).

I have this oportunity to tell you that this transaction must be undertopmost secresy (under WHAT?) and confidential because as you know this is my last hope in life (oh sure, play the sympathy card). you may be away that our government does not care for civil servant hear in nigeran that is the more reason we use every opportunity we have hear in our country.

My regard to your famly.

My next salvo:

Ma'am: it is well that you have properly discussed this effort to give me the business with your dominated other, and come to agreement on proceeding with your effort. I am gratified to know that you are one in this.

As for trust, I have no doubt that I can trust in your desire to give me the business thoroughly, and I will likewise work tirelessly, since I don't own a car. Beyond that, I will leave no stone violated to reciprocate in a manure you are richly deserving of, and obviously feel entitled to. I couldn't agree more to your entitlement in this regard.

With that said, I forward you now my promised bona fides (passport photo, above right). When you next have speaks with me, kindly provide me with an update of all that is needed from me to you in an informational manure, so that I can, in the words of a fleet captain I was once commanded by, "make it so".

By the way, I have written a tart letter to your relation (via the Texus Rangrs), excoriating him for leaving his blood kin in the lurch; that's not a thing that the Addams Family would do, let alone Cousin It. Of that I am certain.

Dr. U. R. Phulovit

Next up: Part III and I did WHAT?