Thursday, May 10, 2012

Same Scam, New Name -- II

It didn't take the Ashfraud people long to process my online 'application'.  I got this back an hour after it was submitted:

Thank you for completing your online profile for The Global Network for Distinguished Professionals listing.  Your profile is currently being processed, please allow 3-5 business days to determine eligibility.  You will be contacted within 3-5 business days by one of our representatives.

I can't wait....*yawn*

Meantime, I reckon I can tell y'all what I submitted:  to Ashfraud Registry I am knowd as Jack N. Meehoff (so when I speak with the sales rep who calls me, I can get 'em to say that a few times), and I am listed as a professional consultant for Denver Fresh Fish Dating (their motto:  "There Are ALWAYS Fresh Fish In The Sea of Love, And We're Your Master Baiter!").  And of course, I had to change my home telephone message to reflect the business.

Perhaps there'll be another story or two out of anyone calling this number besides the scammers over the next few days, but I digress.

Will they be as quick to suspect being 'counterplayed'?

The answer was no...and yes.

I got a long distance phone call from a speech impedimized person who's name sounded like Melody -- a woman from the sound of 'her' -- claiming to represent Ashford, and I responded with my unpatented 'redneck voice' that sounds like a mix of Festus from Gunsmoke and Larry the Cable Guy.  When she tried to verify my "bona fidass", ah gotz indignant an' fahred back with "Y'all jest hol up thar a spell...didcha jest calld me a bony fat ass h'yar?  Jes who do yew thank yew is h'yar?" 

The more she tried in her unprepared way to steer the conversation back toward the Registry, the harder I made it for her to "unnerstand mah axscent" with phrases like "y'all thank ah'm dumber than a buck toothed swamp thang, donche?  Ah'll tall yew wha'...", without ever telling her "wha".. 

Finally exasperated, she hung up on me after calling me "a stupid-sounding idiot who probably didn't have the money or brains to be in the Registry".

She sure nailed me on that 'un, didn't she?

Perhaps the Registry folks will finally put a 'flag' on my phone number...

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Blogger Sueann said...

Well I don't know what her problem was?! I could understand you perfectly. Ha!
And how rude of her to hang up on you when you were being ever so polite! Sheesh!!

10 May, 2012 01:52  
Blogger Sandee said...

Bwahahahahaha. I guess she doesn't want your money. Oh and I understood you just fine.

Have a terrific day. My best to Seymour. :)

10 May, 2012 08:22  
Blogger Right Truth said...

She didn't care if you had the brains, she only cared if you had the MONEY.


Right Truth

12 May, 2012 08:18  

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