Pissed

Oh yeah. 

And I can't blame the scammer for being pissed.  I mean, I took her original letter totally out of context.

And then I shared it with her colleagues and peers that way.

Here is how she meant her email to read (at least the first couple-three paragraphs):

Hello Dear.

I am Crystal Fabien, the only Surviving child of late Interior Minister Mr. Fabien Cael .My father was a highly reputable politician and business magnate who operated internationally during his days on a gold business and politics. It is sad to say that he passed away mysteriously in the recent crisis in Ivory Coast.

I had only one brother who is late also his name was Andrew. He died the same day my father died in the incidence of civil war that was fought in my country. I managed to make my way to a near by village where I am living now because of the tragic incidence couple with the ill treatment I was receiving from my uncles because of my late father's treasure/properties.

When my father was alive, he deposited, $4.5Million United States Dollars with a Bank here in Ivory Coast where I am. Mean while, I have spoken with the bank manager and have also discussed the possibility of releasing the fund to me, But the bank manager told me that they can not release this fund directly to me due to my age. My late father put in the agreement that I can only retrieve the money if anything happen to him by death and I must be at the age of 30 or if I must retrieve the found at any age then my uncle will have to assist me. Now my uncle is after my life because of the money.Yes, I read her original content and intent.  Yes, I took it beyond merely "out of context".  She's pissed.  I understand.  In fact, I am pleased that she is so, considering the context I took on her behalf:

crysfabie@yahoo.cn  

F**k,

I am Crystal Fabien, and I am incontinent.  No, I'm not a country.  I live in one, I think.

No, I am incontinent.  Also knowd as, I wet myself.

My father was a highly contemptible politician and business-taxing maggot who operated illegally during his days on a gold business and politics. It is sad to say that he pissed himself to death in Ivory Coast.  He forgot his Depends.

I had only one brother who is late also his name was Andrew. He pissed himself to death the same day my father did. It's a family thing here:  we piss ourselves continually.  I've been thrown out of six villages because I am always peeing myself.  I managed to make my way to another village where I am hiding now because if they see me piss myself, I will have to leave the country.

When my father was alive, he held a record for having pissed himself 124 times in one day here in Ivory Coast where I am. Mean while, I want Guiness Book of World Records to list him for his record, and they won't even respond to me.  I know he is world record holder for having pissed himself 124 times in one day.  Why won't they give him record?

I need a trusted foreign partner who would not know that I wet myself all day and night long.  I request that you stand as my Foreign Partner in supplying me with Depends.

1) Can you make arrangement for me to come over to your country where I will be free to pee in pools like Olympic swimmers?

(2) What is the penalty for peeing in a pool in America?

(3) They don't have blue dye that highlights when you pee in a waterbed there, do they?

Please consider these and get back to me as soon as possible.

Thanks and I have to go pee again...oops, already did.  Hope I didn't get any on the email...ewww, I did.

It took a couple days, but I did get a response.  And you can tell that she's pissed:

u think this funny???  F**K U!!!

Long as she's pissed, I figured not to waste it:

I'm sorry, but I missed how this would be possible in biology class...can you do both at the same time?

Apparently she doesn't know, as she hasn't yet responded to the question.  I'll let you know if she contacts me with an answer...