Guinea Pig

Yes, I am soon to be a 'guinea pig'. And not the CGI kind that's involved in some kind of animated hit movie.

I'm going to be a dental guinea pig.

A friend I've knowd for a long time now -- more than a quarter century -- is on the downhill slide of her career change, from medical transcriptionist, mommy and divorced-from-a-total-nitwit, to a dental hygienist, mommy, and divorced-from-a-total-nitwit.

And she's made good on her 'threat' to use me as a 'patient', now that that downhill slide requires human sacrifi...er...patients for the students to get experience on.

And here I'd almost hoped she'd forgotten me...dammit ;-)

Don't misunderstand here; I have nothing against dentists. I've seen a couple of good 'uns over the years. I read a pretty sharp and gifted one that also reads this blog (check her own blog out h'yar).

I just hate going to the dentist. I'm a sizeable guy, and with a bit of macho in me. I can take pain. Except the dental kind. When it comes to oral pain, I'm a candyass. Like the time, many moons ago, I had my wisdom teeth out. All four at once.

Good thing, too. 'Cuz after the dry socket I got on my lower left jaw, if I hadn't done 'em all at once, I would have never gone back, EVAH, to finish the rest.

Though, I've been lucky in a dental sense. I had 8 cavities filled in my youth. But none since. After the wisdom teeth crap, I went through 3 1/2 years of braces (to correct TMJ), with another tooth surgically removed prior to the braces. Except for cleanings, nothing since.

Though, I've been a tad...er...unregular in the cleanings in the last...er...uh...few years. And the check ups. Some of it, 'cuz I had a stretch with no dental insurance.

And some of it...'cuz I hate going to the dentist.

I had to go to a preliminary check up in the spring of this year, so her instructor could evaluate my chops as teaching aids, and where the condition of my chops would fit into her training. Because I'm a tad older, with middle-aged teeth, I got relegated to her later semester.

Ugh.

And the day of "what was I thinking, volunteering?" reckoning is fast approaching. All both of them: two four-hour segments. Possibly more, if I'm more of an oral challenge.

Ugh.

But, for a friend...what the heck. What's a little pain between friends, right? After all, she's had to listen to my really bad jokes and puns over the past 27 years or so. Time for me to pay the piper.

And anyway, this experience will do more than just benefit her, career-wise. It will give her a chance to justly claim an opportunity absolutely NO ONE has been able to justly claim since my early childhood, and all of my teen and adult years, and one that might just make up for all those years of bad jokes and puns.

She'll be able, for the bulk of those segments, to shut me up.

She's already an envied hero with my coworkers and friends...