Monday, January 7, 2008

A Year of Change

Welcome to 2008. A year of change, a popular phrase in politics, if a bit void of explaining exactly what kind of change. Save for the poor feller pictured at the right, who obviously ain't got any after being shaken down by the DNC/RNC, and I don't necessarily digress.

2008 is a leap year. Hell gets the chance to freeze over on February 29th, global-warming hysteria aside. Technically, 2008 is an even year in the numeric sense, yet 2008 is sure to be an odd year, with over 10 months of it devoted to a presidential election and all the related video, radio, visual, audio and choreographed fluff BS that will fly prior to (and most likely, therefrom).

But don't worry about politicians eating up all the attention: attention-whore celebs will get their due as well.

For this blog, at least in the early going, it'll be a time for a new approach to my online scammers, on at least one front:

(1) To be sure, I'll continue to deal with a few who started with me just prior to the New Year, in the manure for which y'all know me to apply, and for which they are developing a smell for, since it reminds them of home. For now, I'll stick with the "J. C. Howard" persona on all such responses. Meaning that if I get any affirmative responses from the scammers, they'll be directed to send the support to J. C.'s current digs (pun intended).

Note to Home of Peace Memorial Park Cemetery and Crematorium, Los Angeles, CA: just treat it as junk mail, and whatever you do, DON'T cash the money orders or open the spit valves.

(2) 2008 shall be the inaugural year of Dear Skunky: A Scammer's Advice Columnist. When a scammer sends me a "woe is me" letter, I shall answer it in the best* traditions of Dear Abby, et al. Thoughtful analysis and caring, compassionate responses will be non gratis. Seeking investment advice? Dear Skunky will be right there with the kind of investment background that's allowed me to personally prosper**, and can work for any self-disrespecting scammer, too. Dying scammers who seek a "good, upright Christian person" to handle their "estate" for the benefit of widows and other arachnids? Dear Skunky will see to their 'final wishes' in a manure befitting them. Have a job 'offer' that needs a 'reliable' person in the US to handle customer 'purchases' for an overseas business with 'domestic' customers? Dear Skunky will be happy to give them some pearls*** of wisdom.

For any and all scammers -- new, used, refurbished and cloned -- who seek answers, Dear Skunky will come up widdem, no matter how pathetic.

Of course, there'll be some of the standard fare that Skunk comes up with, such as older favorites from his archives (personal misadventures and seemingly timeless ones on contemporary life), and occasional delves into things of today from a somewhat uniquely Skunkfeathers perspective. At least one or two of which will occasionally start a flame war in the comments.

As Time goes on, change is perpetual. Rivers change course; politicians, too. Weather is cyclical; so too, the media and what they grab hold of to sensationalize (aka, climate change, about every other generation or so).

So and thus, welcome to Skunkfeathers '08.

Oh and yes, I'm still running**** for President, as candidate for the National Barking Spider Resurgence Party. But that's on the other blog, not hyar. Now, you might think that all the contributions from the scammers would be of benefit to this other endeavor; wrong. Granted, it's not a bad notion; but in keeping with the espoused philosophy of the NBSR Party, all contributions from scammers will be gratefully left to collect and compound what it is that them kinda things do. It amounts to the same thing as most politicians are full of, anyway.

* if there's an antonym to the word 'best' -- see Bill Clinton about the meaning of your specific word definitions -- apply it hyar

** haven't got a quarter or a pisspot to my name; easier to avoid having it repossessed that way

*** not the kind that a decent or classy woman would wear; more like the kind she'd let sneak out of her panty hose in a crowded elevator, maybe...

**** in the parody tradition of the late, great comedian/presidential candidate Pat Paulsen


Blogger Herb said...

YEE-HAW!!! Skunk for president...better stick with skunkfeathers for president or people will think I want another Klinton. Anxious to see how the "Dear Skunky" thing works.

07 January, 2008 05:21  
Blogger Jack K. said...

Do barking spiders have any relationship to mice on motor scooters? lol

Good luck on your Dear Skunky endeavor. If you like I can forward some that come to me. Just let me know.

07 January, 2008 07:34  
Blogger Stacy said...

This whole Dr. Skunky thing could have a real future. Dr. Phil's run's gotta end sometime and the public will be clamoring for the next greatest thing.

07 January, 2008 08:25  
Blogger deni said...

You got my vote.

07 January, 2008 09:40  
Blogger Little Lamb said...

You've got my vote. Let's see what a blogger cabn do in the White House! :-)

I think,I'll send you all my spam mail that's worth the read and you can have your fun.

07 January, 2008 14:59  
Blogger Little Lamb said...

You are too much like Mighty Dyckerson. The only difference is you attract a different audience. And you don't use bad language. And you don't do sick posts. Ok, so maybe you two aren't one and the same, but meeting you online, you could be anybody.

What do I really know about you?
What do I really know about Mighty Dyckerson?
What do I really know about anyone I met online?
What do I really know about anybody?

Ah, those are the questions/

I have no idea where I'm going with this. Ok, I'll stop babbling.

Sometimes you just gotta get stuff out of your system.

07 January, 2008 15:07  
Blogger Debbie said...

Skunkfeathers, you are asking the question we are all asking about "change". From what, to what?

Will you name the enemy for what it is, unlike the Democrats who are afraid to say Islamist? You get my vote, hee hee

Debbie Hamilton
Right Truth

09 January, 2008 14:20  

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