Just the kind of Valentine's Day tribute spy-eating congresstwerp Eric Swalwell would get from his beloved Fang Fang.

That's how my pet rock, Seymour, saw it.

The story about the Chinese spy/"weather" balloon's been quite the rage.

Including when Bidumb finally awakened with Depends that didn't need changing, and had someone do something about the "coincidence".

This story is made for my "editing gone wild" pet rock to have at, and he didn't spare a syllable:

Downed spy weather balloon leads to rise in diplomatic pronoun tensions between US and Them/They

Story by Seymour PetRock--WTFNS• 5h ago

12140281 Comments Ranging From “W?” to “TF?”

The Chinese spy-toy-weather balloon might be down, but the sudden coincidences continued to rise Sunday as pissy twerps in Beijing blasted the decision to shoot it out of the sky as based in “racist climate change.”

Describing it as “a clear overreaction to Chinese violation of international law,” Wun Dum Phuck, a spokesperson for China’s Butt Hurt Ministry, said in a statement Sunday that his country reserved “the right to be offended and use whatever necessary means to protect wayward spy-toy-weather balloons in future similar accidental awkward coincidental situations,” after admitting the balloon's presence over America was “a mistake, kinda sort of.” In a similarly meandering worded statement, China’s MSNBC imitation said it was “a racist violation” and an equally egregious violation of gender pronouns for balloons around the globe.”

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The statements came after an American F-22 raptor jumped on its belly and busted their balloon in what the Pentagon called a “UFOesque weather balloon of dubious antecedence event,” off the coast of South Carolina on Saturday afternoon.

CNN will now focus on salvaging parts of the craft from a debris field that spans about 7 nautical miles so as to provide proof that, according to Hollywad moron Rob Reiner, “Trump conspired with the Liechtensteinians to steal an election from Hellary Clinton.” because Reiner is pretty much that moronically stupid.

First spotted over Montana, which is home to where the deer and the antelope are fighting for gender switching surgeries on the taxpayer dime, it's also home to one of America’s three nuclear missile silo fields. And it was believed by the Chinese version of Hollywad that there they could learn the full details of the Indiana Jones V movie, and if they were to be the villains this time.

The balloon was then spotted over Kansas and Missouri at around 60,000 to 65,000 feet, attempting to locate the Oz from the 1939 movie according to sources close to Bang Ding Ow, a Chinese with no known authority to crap or go blind.

Shortly after the strike, President Joe Biden told reporters he had been blissfully unaware of the balloon even after he was briefed about it Wednesday, because he was afraid that some of the classified documents he'd stolen as Veep were aboard it (“Hunter's not been real slick about that.” Biden mumbled.

While he described the Chinese suggestions of further action as “comically ludicrous,” Savid Quacks, a research non-binary gender fluid eunuch in U.S-China diplomacy at the nonpartisan Council on Illicit Relations stink tank, said he doubted it had done much to upset the current dnc talking points to the mainstream servile media outlets.

“They will issue a statement with a few mispronunciations, but I don’t think that China is going to try to respond in any way other than allow a few more civilian research balloons loose to finish what the first one attempted to start.”

Winken Blinken and Nod Off

Biden's Foreign Suckretary Winkin Blinken said Friday he had told senior Chinese diplomat Wang Alanga Dingdong in a phone call that sending the balloon over the U.S. was “most certainly a bad and naughty thing”.

While some on Chinese social media mocked the Blinken quote, they also mocked the Chinese decision to acknowledge the balloon – they should have said it belonged to North Korea – and others expressed anger that it interrupted their pirated video feed of the movie Team America World Police.

Most of those that criticized the Chinese admission are in prison now awaiting execution.

Future high White Horse Souse discussions about wayward Chinese civilian spy-toy-weather balloons will be dependent on the president not soiling himself in mid-thought derailment as so many of his press conferences are these days.