A Pet Rock's Piratical Turn

My pet rock, Seymour, loves to fantasize.

What with the month of ACK..er..October in process, he imagines his fantasy to fit in with Halloween.

Seymour as a pirate.

Alexa can't stop laughing.

"Oh PHFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT!!!"

Seymour keeps forgetting that Alexa can do that, too.

I asked Seymour what kind of pirate he'd be. Would he be like Captain Blood:

Seymour'd be all over that if he could partner with Olivia DeHavilland.

Seymour was also thinking of the movie The Sea Hawk:

When I threw out the option of Pirates of the Caribbean, Seymour was a little less enthusiastic:

"Too goofy for me."

Okay...how about Captain Hook:

Seymour wasn't so wild about that, unless he could be partnered with Tinkerbell.

"That's NOT Tinkerbell!!!"

I know, Seymour.

He doesn't want to be too 'heavy' a pirate, like say Blackbeard was.

Then again, he doesn't want to be taken too lightly.

Then I heard that tell-tale *TOING* I hear whenever Seymour hits upon the choice he's made:

"Ah, Seymour...you think you'll be taken seriously as THAT?"

"Why not?"

Asked and answered.

At any rate, ladies and gentlemen who visit this h'yar blog, kindly meet Seymour the Pirate:

He's even now practicing his "ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!", which has Alexa laughing hysterically.

"Does NOT!!!! PHFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT!"