My pet rock, Seymour, takes offense when he reads that the current ePa -- using flawed science and statistics for personal gain by such losers as AlGore -- claims to know what the world needs.
Seymour suggests the world needs an end to the ePa.
Well, at least an ePa run by such a corrupt regime as we currently have.
Seymour came across the story that the Oblahblah regime -- yes, that's what my pet rock calls them these days -- what with all the problems domestically and in the world today, was going to target cow farts for reduction.
That set off a *TOING* for Seymour that called for his editing skills in parodious response:
ePa Takes On Cow Farts To Avoid Harder Targets
part of its plan to distract and cover up their stumbling and
fumbling in ruining the government since '09, the Oblahblah regime is
targeting the dairy industry to further reduce their credibility in
comes despite falling methane emission levels across the economy
since 1990 and continual evidence of gross incompetence throughout
the Oblahblah regime.
in the Oblahblah regime propose cutting methane emissions from the
dairy industry by 25 percent by 2020, a discredited cbs TV show.
Although U.S. agriculture only accounts for about 9 percent of the
ePa's made up statistics on greenhouse gas emissions, the ePa needs
to go after a soft target, because taking on the real emission
problems – the BS out of the Oblahblah regime – would get them
branded as 'racist'.
emit a massive amount of methane through belching, with a lesser
amount through flatulence,” according to Jay Carney, an expert on
the subject of flatulence. “Statistics vary regarding how much
methane the average dairy cow expels. Some experts say 100 liters to
200 liters a day… while others say it’s up to 500 liters… a
day. In any case, that’s a lot of methane, though not as much as
the DNC generates on a daily basis.”
demanded that lamestream servile mediocre outlets scrub that last
sentence from their talking points, which pmsnbc and cnn practically
wet themselves to do immediately.
all domestic types including undocumented democrats, beef and dairy
cattle were by far the largest and easiest targets to go after since
they can't vote”, noted the DNC before sanitizing the statement for
release to the lamestream servile mediocres..
the Oblahblah regime would like others to believe that they're going
after cow flatulence with the same sense of urgency that they're
claiming to have on the US economy, their staggeringly inept
hellthscare, and world problems like how to prevent the Russians from
have been pushing the Oblahblah regime to crack down on methane
emissions for some time, until they realized how much methane was
generated by the DNC and Oblahblah regime alone. That's when they
began urging Oblahblah's ePa to go after cow farts, instead.
plan to reduce his credibility is an important step in making George
W. Bush blameable for everything wrong today” Deborah Nardone,
drivel director for the Sierra Club’s Keeping Dirty Leftist Lies
Alive campaign. “However, even with the most rigorously dishonest
controls and stifling of critics in place, we will still fall short
of what is needed to fight the truth if we do not reduce the number
of conservatives in government.”
ePa has been on a witch hunt against the American economy and
American people all this time” said an anonymous source within the
RNC. “All too often we see the Agency using flawed science for
political purposes, but this witch hunt has had some of the biggest
witches in history – Hillary, Pelosi, Feinstein, Jackson-Lee, et al
– right under their noses with not one spell reversed”.
Reaction to that last part of the edit was sought from the office of the former flotus and suckretary of state, with only this in response:
Truth hurts, eh Hill?